Me, My Sensory, and My Synesthesia

Storms

I hate thunderstorms. They are literally the most terrifying thing after snakes and bugs. (Although the snake issue is complicated.... :) I'll explain more in a later chapter if anyone's interested or you can just PM me.)

Why do I hate thunderstorms? The thunder, for one. Far-off, it's not bad. Except I know it's coming. And there's nothing I can do. When the thunder is here, suddenly it's one loud crash after another. My skull reels from the chaos of the noise. Loud noises scare me anyways, but one right after another? I'd be hiding under my bed like a dog if I thought I could get back out again. And after it's done, loud noises bother me about 10x more than normal. I flinch when I hear someone speaking loudly, even if it's just the way they talk and I'm used to it. Anything falling or tipping over puts me into a mini panic. It's just too loud. The really gentle thunderstorms don't always bother me like this, but it's not just the sound that affects me:

I can't. Freaking. See.

When it's the middle of the day, you expect to be able to see. You don't expect to need to turn on a light at noon to make it from room to another without running into anything. I normally have superb night vision, even better than the rest of my family. But when it goes from afternoon to late evening within only a few minutes, my night vision doesn't really have time to activate. After a little bit my eyes do adjust, but I've always hated that time when it first darkens, especially for the really big storms. Why? I'm afraid of the dark.

It started with me being afraid of aquariums (I don't remember how this started). Then I suddenly became of snakes. Then my brain took the only two uniting factors (they're both darker than most buildings) and decided that the real enemy was darkness. I was able to get over my fear of aquariums (I think it was mostly the sharks), and for a while, I also got over my fear of the dark. But then one night I opened my eyes to go get some water because insomnia and right as I was about to put my foot on the floor, I suddenly saw my room covered in snakes. Rattlesnakes, cobras, all the venomous ones. I scrambled to pull my foot back under the covers. I knew it wasn't real because I could see them hovering in the air and...it was like how I see my synesthetic colors. I see them, but I don't see them outside my body. I saw the snakes, but they weren't outside my body. Still, it freaked me out so bad and I saw them for so many nights after that I had to recite song lyrics to myself until I was back safely under my covers.

Then I was able to stop doing this, but I still see the snakes in some way. Usually, it's only one. A huge cobra or something down on the floor by my bed. I can't close my eyes after seeing them or it only gets worse, so I have to watch myself go past it and watch it watch me.

So yeah. The dark and I aren't good friends right at the moment.

So, loud noise, the moment day turns to night, and then there's the constant fear of a power out. I don't think I have to explain why that's an issue after what I've just said.

And that is an in-depth explanation of why I despise thunderstorms.

Next time I'll explain a bit more of the snake issue. Sorry if anyone got freaked out reading about them in this chapter.