My Dear Laurens (Lams)

J. Laurens

"Who are you?"

A load of scattered questions filled Alexander's consciousness, all sharing the same answer.

Alexander let his arms stand by his sides and said, "Alexander Hamilton."

His anxious eyes met the curiosity reflected in the body language of the three men. They didn't know what that name meant, or what it would mean. Alexander knew what it could mean, and he didn't waste any time telling them his ambitions.

Before anyone could say another word, Alexander answered any questions they may or may not have been inclined to ask. Alexander's words came out desperate and hungry. On his knees, begging the world to grant him his wishes. Telling these men that he was not just another voice to be heard and only half-listened to. He assessed that Laurens, Lafayette, and Mulligan would if they were intelligent enough, share the same aspirations as him.

One would think that Alexander fumbled through his endless words and sentences. Sentences that morphed into paragraphs, but he did not. Language formed into a rattling of knowledge and conviction.

Laurens was in a trance produced by Alexander's raptured speech. He honed in on Alexander's lips to analyze every fiercely delivered word to understand the depth of his desires. Laurens studied every grape hanging from Alexander's esoteric, infinite vine. Each delicate, purple fruit was a part of Alexander's whole. His mind and ultimately raging intellect.

Laurens knew at this moment that Alexander had seized a portion of his attention that would no longer belong to him. He didn't presume that Alexander had meant to do any of this. Because if he had, Alexander succeeded. He had succeeded in tearing the clothes off of everyone in that room and letting them try to cover their true selves with lies and elaborate stories. Alexander told them the truth in two parts. One, his name would long live in America's history, and two, he was a whirlpool that would devour everything he needed to survive and more.

As Laurens imagined himself bare, and defenseless, and raw in front of Alexander, he recognized a look that he had seen in himself before. A look he was stunned to see in Alexander's eyes. While Laurens may have expected Alexander to be a hard man, that was not the poetry his heart had written. Although the verse was well-hidden, Laurens swore he caught a glimpse of it. It was vulnerability. His heart was trying to scale a wall of stone. There were no cracks or crevices to place his hands and climb further, just a slick and unforgiving mountain. An impossible climb, yet his heart didn't seem to give up despite its many failures. It was sensitive, bruised, and in need of a friend. Laurens wanted to help.

It was then that Laurens realized how long Alexander had been talking.

Laurens leaned over to his friend, Lafayette, and asked, "Do you think he ever stops?"

To that, Lafayette whispered one word in his native language, "Non."

After the brief conversation, Laurens let his focus wander momentarily to the expressions on Mulligan's and Lafayette's faces. He wasn't at all surprised that they shared a look composed of wide eyes, raised eyebrows, and ever-so-slightly parted lips. Laurens couldn't hold in a small laugh at his awestruck friends. There wasn't much he did to try and hide his amusement other than dip his head down to the floor. For a split second, Alexander's monologue wavered. Laurens hoped it hadn't been caused by him.

It had.

Laurens quieted his humored mind and looked up at Alexander, who had reached a halt. Apparently, that was only due to the obligation of a normal breathing pattern. Lafayette took this moment to introduce himself to Alexander. Lafayette must have also seen potential in the nineteen-year-old future scholar, and Laurens guessed, wanted to show Alexander he wasn't alone in his devotion to change. However, before Lafayette began, he handed a pint to Alexander who took a drink along with the rest of the group. There were only four glasses, and Laurens wondered why they were not only missing one glass but one man as well. Even though Burr had disappeared for a reason unknown to Laurens, he didn't ponder for long. Laurens was still sitting down when Lafayette displayed his cause to the table (with only slightly slurred words).