And I Didn't Notice

Chapter 29 Kara's POV

Unedited. I apologize for any errors. 

Sorry for the wait I've been swamped with school and work. 

Here I am, in the D.E.O, for the millionth time. So tell me why it feels like I'm having first-time jitters all over again. I'm suiting up to spar with Katie currently. I've sparred with people without powers before, so I don't know why this is any different. Maybe because this time I'll be having an audience and I'll be fighting my daughter. No, it's probably the fighting my daughter part. I've fought in front of thousands of people before, so the audience is nothing. I can't hurt her while sparring, there will be Kryptonite in the room, yet I still can't shake this fear of hurting her.

"What's got your mind occupied?" Alex asked as she made her way to me.

"I'm just nervous, Alex. What if I hurt her or something?" I asked while putting my clothes in my locker. Alex sits on the bench behind me.

"Kara, have you seen her fight before? I have and trust me, she'll be fine. If anything she'll be thrilled! Katie has been itching to be equal with you, to have you treat her how you do Logan. So, don't hold back. Hold back and she'll hate you forever." Alex says.

"I can't do that Alex! I have so much more experience than her... I can hurt her still." I tried to explain. Alex got up from the bench and grabbed ahold of my shoulders. She inched her face closer to mine, so close that it was impossible to look away.

"Then do it," my sister whispered. "Hurt her."

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Hurt her. Hurt her. My sister told me to actually hurt her. What was that supposed to do, make me feel better? I want to do the exact opposite. I stood there waiting on the mat for Katie to arrive. The whole gang, including Winn and Mon-El were watching, except for Logan. The Kryptonite was especially strong for this specific session because I don't want there to be any chance of me breaking Katie. Sure, I'm beyond nauseous but that's all worth it. I could feel the sweat falling down my back and my ears getting hot. I'm guessing Lena sensed this and started walking towards me.

"It's just sparring, this isn't life or death," Lena said with a comforting smile.

"You don't get it, I could hurt her," I whispered mostly to myself. Lena laid a hand on my arm and pulled me closer.

"We all get hurt, that's life, but sometimes we get to choose who hurts us. Right now Katie is choosing you. She wants, no needs, you to treat her as if Logan or Alex were out there. It may sound crazy but she needs you to hurt her." Lena said softly. I couldn't help but scrunch my nose.

"Alex said the same thing..." Before Lena could ask what I meant by that Katie walks through the door. She looks surprisingly calm, she's determined. I can see that the Kryptonite is affecting her as well, but not nearly as bad as myself. Lena leans over and kisses my cheek with excitement. I'd be lying if I said that didn't catch me off guard.

"You got this!" She cheers then makes her way over to Katie. Get out of your own head. Get out of your own head. Okay, just...kick her ass. Katie hugs Lena firmly before Lena walks back over to everyone else. She creates a distance between herself and the others. We both just stand there, staring at each other. Katie is the one to take the first step forward. Before anything happened Winn calls out.

"Do you guys want some music? I want some music," he yells. Katie and I speak in unison.

"No!" I shout back.

"What's Up Danger!" Katie yells in response. Winn runs over to Alex's speaker and connects his phone. 

"Alrighty!" Winn shouts as he hits play.