Flower ||| Ateez

Author's Notes

Hello my Flamies!

I had a reader ask me what my thought process was when going through writing my stories, so I thought I would take some time to write some of it down for anyone else who is interested!

For this story, I must say that I was really nervous to start it. Things are about to get a little personal here so I hope you're ready.

I want to start off by saying that I've always had a bit of a dark mind, if you guys haven't noticed with my other stories. I've been drawn to stories where the characters have dark pasts or have to overcome challenges and grow throughout the story. I do NOT in away condone what happened in this story, but my mind did get the better of me.

When I first discovered Wattpad and fan fiction (which I'd heard of people writing fanfic before but never sought it out) it was with an Ateez pirate story. I was hooked right away and I knew that I would love to do this.

Ateez came into my life when I was at a very low point for me. My family life has been getting worse and worse every year and sometimes I feel like I'm the only one trying to hold it together. Although now I'm to the point where I'm just about done. My dad hasn't been a good dad for over 10 years now, and it's slowly breaking everything apart.

I think a big part of 'Flower' came from me wanting to get my frustrations out on how angry I am at my dad. Like I said, my mind kind of ran away with me, but I know that's why Lily's adopted father ended up being such a scumbag.

I also wanted to show how much I had fallen in love with Ateez too by pulling from some of their content. I know some of you picked up on the scenes I mimicked in here when I could!

To be honest, I'm not quite sure how I fully came up with the entire plot line. This story came to me really easy. I knew that I wanted to put it in a college setting and have the characters all be at the age everyone in Ateez is now. Lily was modeled after myself, mostly, so I drew on that a lot and thought about how I would react in these situations.

I knew I needed to have some high and low points, so I had a lot of fun with them going to the mall and playing laser tag. The kiss from Wooyoung honestly surprised me as much as it did you guys haha. It just felt right for the moment so I went with it.

I've always been deeply invested in music, so having them all pursue the dancing side of things came naturally to me too (even though I can't dance to save my life...). I liked the idea of Lily being really strong in dancing and fitting in right away. I wanted her to have that natural bond with them that would allow her to open up and come out of her shell once she felt comfortable, especially after losing Micah.

Lily was never given the proper time to mourn him, either. So I hope I was able to convey that in a way that made it clear. He is another piece that I took from my own life, too. In 2014, I lost my best friend suddenly, 2 weeks before my 21st birthday. His older brother gave me a present from my friend and their family. He said it was specifically from my friend, and the charm reads 'I am thankful in God's design. He planned it so that your path crossed mine'. At the time I worked in a consignment store and someone brought in some old beads. One of them was a silver 'M'. It came in on a day that I was really missing him too, so I added it to his bracelet. It's been a comfort to me, even now, so I wanted Lily to have something she could hold onto as well.

At first, the idea of the boys actually forming a group and going on tour wasn't a part of the story. The idea just came to me one day and I was like, oh this is perfect! I knew they needed a story to follow on their own and I wanted to give them a goal as well. It ended up working out well since they had a safe place for Lily to stay too.

The biggest thing I wanted to get through in this story is that even though Lily grew up the way she did, she didn't let it change who she was as a person. I think that's one of the most important things in life. Everything can change around us, and we can adapt to survive, but there are fundamental parts of ourselves that we shouldn't let anyone change. This is the reason why I had her ask to have her father buried next to Carol. I know some of you questioned why she would do this, which is perfectly understandable! But Lily remembered his love for Carol, and how happy they had been before Carol died. Lily didn't let that change her kind heart.

I hope you guys enjoyed this little insight to my first story!! I'm planning on doing this again for a few of my other ones as well so please look forward to it!

If you have any questions for me about the book, why I did what I did, characters, maybe something I didn't touch on, anything like that I would LOVE to hear them! I could talk about this book forever haha. Don't by shy!! I love talking with you guys so much <3

Please feel free to comment here.

As always, you guys are my treasure and I love all of you so very much <3<3

~~flamewhipper