Living Life With The Parker Boys

Chapter Twenty-Eight: The Familiar and the Strange

Chapter Twenty-Eight

The Familiar and the Strange

I lied in bed that night, staring at the ceiling, wide awake. I’d slept too long the two previous nights and now I was paying the price. My mind was wondering places I didn’t want it to. I could not for the life of me stop thinking about that picture of the Parker family on the beach and how it would never be mine, not that I wanted it in the first place.

That was the question, wasn’t it? That’s what it came down to in the end.

What did I want?

Blake wanted me to seize the opportunities this place could give me.

Richard wanted to me to give them a chance.

My parents wanted God knows what...for me to be a better person? To be rid of me?

Beth wanted what I wanted, so she says.

What do I want?

I want to go home. 

Wherever home is. 

I want to be with my family.

What family?

I want to be happy.

Happiness comes with a price.

The next day was like torture. I watched from my bed as the sun made an appearance, peeking over the hill top, casting an orange, pink hue across the sky. The morning moved slowly. I got dressed for school, I ate breakfast and I got a ride with Logan. Everyone’s voices and every sound just seemed like background music. I barely muttered a word all morning, I think it’s the quietest I’d been since I’d arrived. I saw the worried look Beth cast towards Richard at breakfast. It just wasn’t my day.

My mind refused to work during class and I did nothing to stop it from doing so. Through each class I lent my head against my desk or doodled meaningless drawings in my notepad. I avoided everyone at all costs. During lunch period instead of sitting in the canteen I walked towards the back of the school steps where the stoners hung out. I’d seen Ash wonder around the place a few times. The time I’d spent in my old school had been at the back of the school, like this one. Except the people were uglier, meaner and not as rich as they were. It wasn’t hard to get one of them to pass me a cigarette. I just had to put on my expressionless face mask and ask them. They weren’t looking for trouble, probably to scared of getting found out by the teachers and then inevitably their parents.

I dug around in my pocket before pulling out my lighter. I lit the cigarette, placing it between my lips. I took a long drag. This was all too familiar. The smoke hovered in the air before being carried away by the wind. I inhaled the smoke deep into my lungs, knowing that I had been doing well without smoking until now and not caring. When it was short enough to burn my fingers, I dropped it to the ground, crushing it beneath the sole of my shoe. I didn’t bother going back to class after that. Instead I stayed at the back of the school, waiting for the final bell to ring. I would have left and walked back to the Parker house but after last time I decided to stick with getting a lift. 

The Parker boys were the last to exit the school building, most of the cars had left the parking lot already. I was lent against Logan’s car, waiting impatiently. I didn’t say a word when he unlocked the door and hopped in. 

“What’s up with you?” He asked along the way. I didn’t bother to reply. We didn’t speak the rest of the ride. When he finally pulled up outside the Parker house I jumped out, happy to be out of that claustrophobic space.