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CHAPTER FOURTEEN: LOVE IS BULLSHIT
LUNA FURROWED HER EYEBROWS as she looked at her younger sister. She didn't understand why she seemed so panicked, but at the same time she knew and understood very well. Luna carefully watched Estella's facial expressions as she asked her next question. "Is that a bad thing?"
"I don't know." Estella admitted with a frown. "I don't know how to feel, I don't like the things she makes me feel. I don't-" Estella let out a frustrated sigh as she cut herself off. She closed her eyes tightly, burying her face in her hands as she tried to find the right words for it.
"How does she make you feel?" Luna asked curiously, her head cocking slightly to the side. Estella looked up at her and Luna offered her a small smile and placed a hand over her sisters in reassurance. "It's okay."
Estella looked at her for a moment before softly sighing. Her fingers interlaced with her sisters as she sat up straight. "It's. . . weird. She makes me feel so many things that I've never felt with anyone I've ever been with. She makes me feel nervous and scared, but at the same time she makes me feel relaxed and she makes me feel all giddy inside and it makes me want to throw up because I sound so cliché right now and it's making me internally cringe." Luna laughed in amusement whilst Estella just smiled at her own words.
"Would you cringe if I told you that you were in love?" Luna asked, forcing Estella to look at her.
"If I were in love, why do I feel so scared? Why do my nerves get the better of me whenever she steps into the same freaking room as me? I hate it so much." Estella huffed with a frown pulling on her lips.
"You feel scared because. . ." Luna softly sighed as she spoke her next words. "Love is a terrifying thing, Estella. The words I love you is one of the most overused and abused phrases in the world which it makes it absolutely terrifying to hear someone say it to you, because you don't know if they mean it or not. Saying the words are completely different from showing them. Showing someone that you love them is always the first step before saying those three words that somehow manage to have such the biggest impact on your relationship, whether that's a good thing or not depends on the other person.
"Your nerves get the best of you because your heart―︎even if yours isn't beating―︎feels something for that person, a connection per say. It makes us vampires feel human all over again. You feel like your heart is beating at such a rapid pace in your chest, even though it's not moving at all. Your hands feel like their sweating when they're not. And your mind, your mind just spirals in dizziness. And though you might hate it now, trust me when I say it becomes one of the best feelings ever." Luna smiled at her sister who was watching her expression the entire time.
"Is this how you felt with Jasper?" Estella asked. Luna's smile seemed to brighten ten times more at the mention of her husbands name.
"It's how I still feel. Even after almost four years of being together, I still get that feeling every time I see him." Luna answered. Luna looked at her sister once more, taking note of the look that was on her face. "I'm not trying to push you to go for it, but I'm not going to say I don't not want you to go for it. You deserve to be happy, Estella. You've been through a lot. Do what you think is best for you." Luna gave her sister a kiss on the top of the head before she squeezed her hand and got up, leaving Estella alone with her thoughts.
Estella sat there on the bed, going through every thought that was swarming around in her head. She groaned in annoyance and threw herself backwards so that she was laying on the bed. Her hands were covering her face as she tried to decide what she should do.
"Love is such bullshit." Estella finally grumbled before forcing herself off of the bed and walking out of the room.
━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎━︎ 728 words Here's another short filler chapter for you! I'm not gonna lie and say that this book is getting closer to the end. It's a short little story that's for my baby Alice and Estella. I haven't decided how I'm going to end it yet but I think I have an idea.
