Words I never Tell

Chapter 18

Candice

Stop. Give up. She's not yours. You are just making it hard for her to choose.

Tumayo na ako at pasimpleng lumabas bago pa magkainitan at tuluyang mag-away si Hariette at Ate Alliston ng dahil sakin.

Ate Grant will surely hate her. Their friends will take Ate Alliston's side. No mistress and cheater win the sympathy of everyone, not even once.

"Let me go with you. This room is becoming more and more of a drama theater." Inakbayan ako ni Ate Alice.

Sumenyas lang ito kay Ate Railey na magpapahangin sa labas. Tumango lang din naman si Ate Railey na mas ginusto magpaiwan para awatin kung sakali man na mag-away si Ate Alli at Hariette.

Much as I want to stay, I cannot afford to expose myself as the other woman. Mapapahamak ko lang si Hariette. I am not afraid of Ate Grant. I am more afraid that Hariette is afraid of what her best friends will think of her, of what ate Alli will do to me, to us, to everyone. I can sense her fear.

Tahimik kaming lumabas ng gym ni Ate Alice para maglibot-libot na lang sa area. I don't even know what I am doing here.

Dapat nakinig na lang ako kagabi kay Hariette when she told me na huwag na akong pumunta dito sa practice game nila dahil baka magwala na naman si Ate Alliston pag nakita ako. It turns out, Ate Alli hate me nga. Sa sobrang galit nito, pakiramdam ko nga gusto na ako nitong sugurin kanina pero napigilan lang sa kung anuman na binulong ni Hariette.

Or maybe she stopped dahil umiiyak na yung isa? She can't stand seeing Harriete crying too.

I am starting to wonder kung ano bang nagawa ko sa kanya? Why is she hating me so much? Totoo kaya na sila ni Hariette? That what's going on between them is real and not just what I think it is? Does she like Hariette as much as I do?

"Hariette likes you." Sabi ni Ate Alice. "But much as I hate it, I need to tell you this, Candice. I trust your judgment. You're too mature for your age naman so I believe you can understand why Alli is behaving like that, right?"

Umiling ako. Ang totoo, hindi ko talaga maintindihan kung bakit sobra yung galit nito sakin. She used to be nice to me naman noon. Lalo pa pag inaaway ko noon si Hariette. She's saving me. So what happened?

You take what hers. It's normal that she reacts that way, Candice.

"I was like you din dati when I met their group, Candice." Ngumiti pa si Ate Alice.

Patuloy pa din kami sa paglalakad. Hindi ko nga alam kung saan kami papunta.

"I was lost too. I want to belong. You can't help it. They are bunch of cool kids. They are nice too. Especially Leigh and Sammie. I first admired Leigh before Railey courted me."

"Niligawan ka ni Ate Railey? Si Ate Railey yung gumawa ng first move?" Nagtatakang tanong ko. Kasi naman yung aura ni Ate Alice sobrang dominating. Parang kagaya ni Ate Grant at Ate Alli. Tapos si Ate Railey pa yung nanligaw dito?

I wonder how that courtship went. For sure, epic iyon. Yung itsura pa naman ni Ate Railey and the way she talks, it's so soft. Swear!

"Yeah. But things weren't easy for us too. I guess ganun naman talaga di ba? Kung madali mo lang makukuha, we won't appreciate its value ."

"Yeah, if it's easy, It's easy to give it up too."

"It will be hard fighting for your place, Candice. Ako nga na legal na girlfriend ni Railey at mahal nya, nahirapan. What more sainyo pa ni Hariette? That won't be easy. Idagdag pa yung age gap ninyo."