What we are now

Nightmares and insecurities

"We're Sorry, the number you're trying to reach is unavailable, please leave a voicemail after the beep."

Beep!

"Hey Sam's," I sigh "I was really hoping you'll pick up the phone... I was just at your house, and I need to speak with you."

I pause, thinking what to say.

"I don't really know why I'm calling, our last conversation seemed pretty final... But I really don't really like how things ended between us that day.

You meant the world to me, you still do. I've been really worried about you those past few months, that's why I was so upset with you last week, I should've been more patient, more understanding, I'm really sorry.

I feel like too much has gone without saying in our friendship, and a lot of it is my fault, I guess I wasn't honest with you like I should've, and I was pushing you away without even noticing because of that.

You'll probably never hear this voicemail, but I need to say this. I need to get this off my chest.

I love you, Asami."

"Now isn't that pathetic?" A voice says from behind me, and I turn around, seeing Asami standing in the middle of the street, an amused smile spread across her lips.

"Asami?" I mutter in disbelief "What are you-"

"You love me?" She cuts me off with a laugh "didn't know you were the kind of girl to fall helplessly for someone so completely and utterly out of their league."

"What?" I blink in confusion "Asami..-"

"This," she gestured between us and stepped forward, a pitiful smile playing on her lips "this will never happen."

This is wrong, something isn't right I... This is not what happened, this wasn't how it's supposed to go.

"It already has," I argue, clutching onto my statement like my life depends on it.

"Is it? Or are you just my dirty little secret?" She smirked "After all, it wouldn't be a first for you, now would it?"

My heart sank at her words "It's different..." My voice shook "it's different this time."

She leaned in to my ear "Watch out," she whispered, and before I got to understand what she meant, she pushed me to the ground, and my eyes widen as I see a pair of headlights making their way towards me.

I jolted upwards with a terrified gasp, feeling the cold air hitting my damp from sweat skin, making me shiver. My heart is pounding so hard I can't hear anything besides the pulse in my ears, and I choke out a sob, fisting my shaking hands as tears form in my eyes.

Then suddenly, I feel warmth wrapping me from behind, and I almost jump from the touch in panic, until I hear a familiar soothingly voice speak.

"Shh... It's okay... I'm here..."

I let out a trembling breath of relief, she's here... Asami's here... I'm not alone, I'm alright. I hug my knees as she rests her chin on my shoulder, her hands rubbing my tigh soothingly, and no words are spoken at this exchange, yet it's somehow more powerful then anything she could've said.

"I'm sorry," I choke out once I calm down "I'm so so sorry."

"Don't be," she said softly, pressing a light kiss to my shoulder, her lips sending a shudder down my spine "You really should stop apologizing for this."