make it or break it // lee chaeyeon + miyawaki sakura

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Chaeyeon's POV

I blankly stare back at my own reflection as my heartbeat matches the loud chants from the audience in the arena.

This is it.

I'm finally making my debut.

All those hard work and heartbreaks will finally pay off in a few minutes. I'm feeling so nervous but excited at the same time because today will mark our official day as IZ*ONE.

My phone rings from the table in front of me, bringing me back to my senses, and so I quickly answer it.

"Unnie!"

"Chaeryeong-ah." I greet her while wearing a wide smile.

"Do your best okay? I'm here with Mom, Dad and Chaemin! We'll be cheering for you as always."

"Ya Chaeryeong-ah, you're making me cry." I playfully scold her as tears roll down my cheeks.

Dang it, I just got my makeup done!

"Don't cry you loser," she laughs. "You have no idea how proud I am of  you, unnie. Do good okay? I'll see you after the concert! I'm going back inside. Stop crying, you'll look ugly!"

I sniffle out a chuckle then I hang up, turning to the artist once again to get my makeup fixed.

"Are you okay?" Minju suddenly asks when she notices my teary eyes and the others look at me as well.

"Chaeryeong called. Just got a bit emotional."

"Aigoo, you look like a cute tomato." Yena teases with a giggle and I glare at her through the mirror.

While everyone's engaging themselves in our conversation, I swiftly glance at Sakura who was mindlessly sitting on the couch with her eyes focused on her phone.

I can't help but feel upset somehow.

For the past few days, she's been very distant to me. It all started after our picnic back in Japan. It's like, whenever there are cameras around that are shooting for our reality show, she treats me like how she used to, but when we're all alone, she puts up this space between us. I don't seem to understand why she does that.

I don't want to make it a big deal, though. Maybe she just wanted to get closer to the other members as well. Days after we were formed as a group, we were inseparable. Literally. So I'll just assume she's keeping a distance from me in order to get to know the others more.

Besides, I don't recall doing anything that would make her mad or upset at me, right?

Yeah, I never did anything wrong at all. I should stop overthinking.

I take deep breaths to calm myself down so I can completely be ready to put on a good show tonight.

-

"Next stage is Rumor. You're up in a minute!" The stage manager announces while people from the technical staff are basically scrambling around to secure our mics for the next performance.

Hyewon, Sakura, Tomi, Nako, Wonyoung, Yujin, and Yuri just got off stage after finishing their performance of '1000%' and the remaining 5 of us watch them from backstage since we would be next. 

"Good job girls!" The staff commends and when we bump into them, we give them high-fives and encouraging remarks. 

Sakura walks past me and I hold on to her wrist. "Hey, you did great out there."

She stares back at me in a manner which I can't really decipher. Her orbs that always glisten up whenever she speaks to me appear to be... surprisingly empty and stony right now. 

"Thanks." She shortly says before walking off as I hear my name being called by the others. 

...

After performing 'Rumor', we all gathered on stage to interact with the audience and the MC. Then, a video clip was played to entertain the crowd while we rush to our dressing rooms for our 'La Vie en Rose' stage. 

People were running here and there as we scurry around to finish within the designated amount of time before we would be performing once again. The dressing rooms were a total mess. No joke. As quickly as we possibly can, we get into our red outfits so that we can tidy up our hair and makeup afterwards. 

"Yay! I'm the first one to finish!" Yena joyfully celebrates as she runs out of the room to freshen her look up. 

"She's such a child, I swear." Yuri says with a laugh.

Soon enough, some of the members start to head out of the door and I was still stuck here, with my stupid pair of shorts and belt. I guess Sakura notices how much I've been struggling, so even before she could step out of the room, she nears me. Placing her arms around my waist to properly fasten my belt, I intently watch how her face wears no emotions at all.

"Saku-chan..."

"What?"

"We're okay, right?"

She looks up to me after fixing my belt, shooting a blank stare into my expectant eyes. She opens her mouth to say something, but a person barges back into the room so she quickly removes her arms off my waist.

"Girls, hurry up a bit." Eunbi unnie informs us, not really realizing that she had interrupted something.

"We'll be there." Sakura replies back, walking towards the door and leaving me behind.

I was hoping she would turn back to call me, but she never did. 

I guess I got my answer then.

-

Minutes turn into hours.

Hours turn into days.

Days turn into weeks.

I'm still left wondering what I had done wrong to Sakura.

She's been treating me differently. It feels like all those bond and closeness we've created and earned since Produce 48 were suddenly washed away.

And I don't even know why.

She refuses to tell me. Whenever I'd confront her about it, she changes the topic right away, or she would simply say, 'What do you mean? I don't know what you're talking about' over and over as if it didn't matter so much to her.

I don't really know what's going on, but the Sakura I once knew had definitely changed.