Epilogue
I put the three PT on the table while my eyes are close, Sere is with me. I let her see what is the result, that's why I'm waiting for her reaction. I'm so nervous, omgosh!
This days I always vomit! every morning nga e, then every time na gigising ako ang sama ng pakiramdam ko, I don't know why. I told this to Ate Dionne, pati na rin kay Sere. They suggested na I should use PT, kasi feeling raw nila na buntis ako.
Halos mamula pa yung mukha ko when they asked me kung kailan yung last na ano! omg! I can't tell, nahihiya ako. Yung mga tanungan kasi nila bulgaran e, walang preno yung bunganga, grabe! basta alam niyo na yun.
“Anong result?” kinakabahan kong tanong habang nakapikit pa rin ang mga mata ko.
Sobra talaga yung kaba na nararamdaman ko, Sana positive kasi ilang months na namin gusto magka-baby ni Saint, every time I babysit my niece and nephew I felt jealous? hindi naman siguro no? tuwing nakakasama ko kasi sila parang gusto ko na ring magka-baby, parang ang sarap sa feeling na may sarili kang anak, na ikaw ang nag-aalaga at nag-aasikaso. I also tell about this to Saint, we started to do a family planning but until now parang hindi sang-ayon sa amin.
Kaya nga this time, I hope it's positive.
cross finger…
“Sere? ano na? kinakabahan ako! One line pa rin ba?” nalulungkot kong sabi.
My eyes are still closed and ayoko pang i-open. Still waiting to her reaction.
“Girl?”
“What?” I bit my lower lip after I said that.
I closed my fist, habang nagdadasal sa isipan na sana positive, sana may baby na sa tummy ko huhu. I really want to have a child, I mean WE.
“Sere!” I pouted, ang tagal naman kasi e.
I heard her sighed heavily, kaya mas lalong napapikit ako ng mariin. I think I know the answer, sa simpleng ganun lang alam ko na ang sagot, ayoko pang imulat ang mata ko, ayokong makita yung PTs.
“Oy, ano yan? bakit nakapikit si Kanji? naglalaro ba kayo?”
I heard Sceven voice, for sure siya ang nagsalita. He is with someone, hindi ko makita pero sure ako na may kasama siya.
“Pinagti-tripan mo ata si Kanji, babe.”
Oh! I think si Clyde kasama ni Sceven, ka-boses niya kasi e at saka babe ang tawag niya kay Sere, alangan namang si Sceven ang tawagin niyang babe!
“Shut-up!” mataray na sabi ni Sere. “Stop asking nga, psh.” she added.
Tahimik lang akong nakikinig sa kanila… habang kinakabahan pa rin.
“Okay, you can open your eyes na Kanji.”
I shook my head. “Sabihin mo muna kung anong result-”
“You should open it na, grabe! What kind of sp**m does Saint have-”
“Stop!” naiiyak kong sabi.
When I opened my eyes, I immediately took the three PTs. I think we should stop na? or magpa-check up na kaya ako? until now wala pa rin e.
Ayun na lang yung last wish ko but until now hindi pa rin magkatotoo, nakakalungkot.
“Your mouth, psh!” Clyde scolded her.
“Anong stop? where's Saint ba? tawagan niyo nga at papuntahin dito, iiyak na naman si Kanji girl!”
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