Saving Her Lost Soul

Chapter 17

We are all set and ready to go. We head outside and we see Evelyn's mother on the way out at the desk, "Have fun guys," I roll my eyes. "Keep a close eye on the new kid Evie, he's not been here before."
"Yeah, Mom, I have done this before you know." She's always hated the way here mother doesn't trust her with anything. Her Mother is always second guessing her. We head outside to the first section.
Evelyn goes through the safety procedures, blah, blah. I could give the talk myself I've heard it so often. I start attaching myself to the line ignoring her. "Riley, you can't just go, I'm not finished."
"Is that what you said to my boyfriend whilst you fucked him?" her mouth falls open in shock, "Yeah, don't think I didn't know about that. You were my friend, I guess a shitty one at that." I say as I climb the ladder.
"Riley. . . wait. Let me explain," she says as I'm half way up the ladder. I stop and look down at her.
"What is there to explain? You fell for his charm, as did I and you didn't have the guts to tell me. It's okay Evelyn, I'm used to being let down. Story of my life," I carry on climbing.
"Riley!" Flynn calls. I glance at him but I don't stop, he quickly starts attaching his line. "It's okay, I'll catch her up. She's such a bloody drama queen. You owe me so bad bro."
"Yeah, you're right. Night out on me when we're back," Tyler says. I carry on up the ladder, bloody stupid fucking feelings. I hate them, that's why I wanted to feel numb. I reattach my line once I'm at the top and start stepping the platforms.
"Ri, stop. Just wait, okay?" I get to the other side and I turn around. He slowly crosses the platform. He reaches me and he shakily re-attaches onto the wire. "The fuck are you? The height doesn't bother you? It's like you were walking on the ground."
"Are you afraid of heights?" I ask in disbelief.
"I'm not like really afraid, it's just not natural. I'd walk anywhere after you, you know? Over hot coals, over mountains, over a thousand nails."
"Yeah, okay," I mutter.
"Why didn't you tell me he cheated on you too?"
"What does it matter? It was all a lie anyway. Apparently Elise was his real girlfriend anyway. Whatever, it's enivitable. I'm just not that special," I shrug.
"Don't say that to me. You're special to me, you're the best thing in my life. I will do everything in my power to keep you Ri. I wish I didn't have to fucking hide this because your insecurites are showing like fuck. I want to show you off so you wouldn't feel like this. I'll talk to Tyler." My mouth falls open at his raw confession.
"He will never understand us," I whisper. I pull him behind the tree so my family won't see us. "I don't want you to lose your best friend because of me. I'll just have to deal with this. I'm sorry, I just. . . it's all ever known."
He presses his forehead to mine, "Are you sure? Because I would you know? I don't want you feeling like this. I hate seeing you upset."
"I've always been this way Flynn, you just opened the gates. Sometimes I feel like I should be crying but I'm still broken, I can't. I'm not normal."
"I don't think I'd want to see tears in those beautiful eyes. They should be shining not crying. I love that I'm the only one with a key to your heart. I make you feel and I'm the only one. You are mine and I am yours," he pulls me towards him and kisses me.
I feel his trembling body as he puts his weight on the tree. It's like he's pulling me from the edge, he's protecting me even when he's terrified. "You really are scared of heights," he pulls away from my lips and gives me a shy smile.
"It's not normal to be so at ease up here," I giggle.
"I'll protect you." I laugh and he laughs with me.
"I thought you'd be scared of heights too if I'm honest." I stop laughing and he frowns at me.
"It's the only place I can't be hurt, or at least where people haven't hurt me." I shrug. He nods his understanding.
"Flynn?" Tyler calls and I step back away from Flynn but Flynn keeps his hand on my hip until he knows I'm stable. I'm attached to a bloody wire, I'm not going to fall. Tyler comes into view around the tree. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah, your sister is just a drama queen like I told you." I slap Flynn's arm playfully and he rubs his arm like I wounded him.
"You sure you're okay?" I nod and reattach my line to the next wire. I walk over away from them. I attach my line to the zip wire, I look back and they are both struggling over the last platform. I let my body fall and I hold onto my line feeling the wind rushing through my hair.
I feel free as a bird coming down here. I take in the surroundings, it's so beautiful out here. My feet reach the ground and I run to stop myself from falling. I detach myself and I walk into Evelyn. "Riley, I want to talk."
"Why? I'm not your friend, so why does it matter?"
"You were once. I'd like to be again, I know I wasn't a good friend."
"I don't have friends, Evelyn. People hurt you, it's easier to be on your own."
"So what is he? You look friendly with him." I look up at Flynn who's hesitating to come down the zip wire.
"He's Tyler's best friend. He's not my friend. We have to get on for Tyler's sake but we will never be friends. I cut all ties when I had the accident."
"You were my best friend Riley. I'm sorry I did that to you. He told me everything I wanted to hear and then when he got what he wanted he ghosted me." What does she expect from a guy like him who was openly in a relationship? "I was too afraid to tell you, I didn't want to lose you."
"I'm not even that upset Evelyn."
"Why? Can you please stop calling me that. You never call me that."
"That's your name!" I snap, "I was upset at the time but it was all a fucking lie! He was the worst fucking person! He ruined my life, he was a shitty boyfriend! I'm not fucking doing this with you." She takes a step back from me in horror.
"I've never heard you swear before. Please call me Evie, you always used to. He's dead Riley and you speak with such ill will. He was a douche but was he really that bad?" I walk towards her with anger written all over my face and she backs up holding her hands up.
"Riley!" Tyler shouts from the platform where he is. I stop in my tracks and start walking to the next section. I know she's with me.
"He wasn't the person you all thought he was. Yes I killed him, yes it was an accident. You don't know what it was like for me so you'll never comprehend. He broke me, the accident broke me. I can't feel, I can't get close to people. He ruined me and you didn't even notice." Although that is starting to change.
"Then tell me Riley, you always used to. You used to tell me everything about how he took you to the lake for a picnic and you shared your first kiss. When he asked you to be his girlfriend on christmas day."
I stop and turn around and she stops dead, "I told you all the good moments. I didn't tell anyone when he took my virginity without my permisson! How he used to hit me when I hung out with you, or how it was all a lie. It was all game to him, he did it to get up the social ladder. The rich naive girl that could be easily manipulated!" her mouth falls open.
"He what?" I see Flynn and Tyler has got to the bottom of the zip wire. "He wouldn't, he was always so nice. He loved you," no he didn't.
I walk towards her, "He didn't love me. He wasn't nice!" I shove her and she screams. She falls to the floor and I turn my back on her.
"Riley!" Tyler shouts. I'm never going to get through this course with her here. I look over my shoulder and they are running to her aid. Flynn helps her to her feet and I keep walking. "Riley, stop." Tyler shouts at me.
"No, I'm not going to fucking apologise. I told her I didn't want to be friends. She fucking pushed me! I don't even care she slept with him but to defend him! I ain't listening to that!" he catches up with me and he grabs my hand. I shove him like I did with Evelyn but he holds his ground.
"I didn't ask you to apologise. Calm down, you have a right to be angry but you can't go around assaulting people." I shove him again and carry on walking. "Fuck sake Riley. I thought you had calmed down somewhat!"
I reattach and start climbing, "I'm always going to be broken, I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you! I'll never be the same as I was. Maybe I should just grab a bottle and save yourself all this bother!"
"Riley!" Flynn growls. Tyler remains speechless and I regret my words but sometimes watching them hurt around me I just think it would be easier for them. I'm always going to be a fuck up. I'm too selfish to think of others when I'm hurting.
"How can you get through to her? She always pushes me away."
"I don't know, I just make her listen. I don't take her shit, I'll speak to her. Again," I roll my eyes. He can't keep up with me so good luck with that. I attach myself to the swing, "Riley!" I throw myself off and swing in the air and I hit the net. I swing back away from the net and once I'm swinging back to the net I hold my hands out to grab it. I start pulling myself up, all the weights I've been pumping has meant this is nothing.
It takes me mere seconds to climb it and get to the next section and attach myself to the tree. "Ri, just wait. Please," I ignore him and carry on, "Fuck sake." I look at the next platform. There's an easy option and a hard option. I go with the harder option, one so Flynn can't follow or atleast can't keep up and two because I like a challenge.
I attach the line and start stepping into the stirrups and I wobble. I find the next one to step into, okay this is harder than I thought. I keep going holding tightly with my arms to the wire trying to keep stable. I look back and I wobble and nearly fall, "Riley, be careful." I catch Flynn's worried face and I try concerntrate. The pain on his face lingers and I keep going. I reach the end of the platform and I reattach. I sit down waiting for Flynn, I know he can't fall but I should never have made him do the harder option.
He said he would follow me anywhere. I'm glad that he is keeping to his word but I hate that I put him at risk. I watch as he shakily makes his way over. Every movement has me holding my breath. Once he's close I stand up. He places a foot on the platform and I pull him closer to the tree. "I'm sorry," I say as I keep hold of his hoodie.
"Why are you sorry?" he strokes my cheek quickly and then attaches his line to the wire.
"For making you do the hard option. I didn't like the feeling of putting you at risk like that. I'm sorry."
"Hey, nothing would have happened to me. These wires are strong as steel. Why did you push her Ri? You nearly decked her before that."
"She wants to be friends and I don't have friends. She said he was nice! Nice?! She tried defending him to me. She said he loved me! I could have done a lot worse."
"Would it really be such a bad thing to have a friend? Maybe he did love you in his own way. You are very lovable."
"Yes, yes it would! She's hurt me before, she will do it again. Everyone hurts me, if she can't believe me over that fucker then I don't have a lot of hope, do I?"
"I wasn't really aiming it at her. I just meant in general. You need support Ri, all this anger isn't good for you. I don't think you really care what she did, it's him you're angry at. You are just so used to pushing people away."
"I know, okay? I don't care, that she fucked him. Well only a little bit, I'd be starting world war 3 if it was you though." I say and turn away. I thought I loved him but loving Flynn has made me realise that it was child's play. Nothing has come close to the way I feel about Flynn.
He laughs, "Not ever going to happen, not with her or anyone but you. Can you please stop freaking out now please? You're making me exhausted with your mood swings." he turns me to face him again. He doesn't make me feel embarrased about my feelings and I need that.
"I'd rather make you exhausted in other ways," I grin and he raises his eyebrow. I giggle and I see Tyler coming into view.
"Later, don't talk dirty to me now," he whispers in my ear and I squirm. "Now come on, I'd like to move on so I can get my feet firmly on the ground." I nod and walk around the tree to the next section. It's a tunnel, I crouch down and attach my line. I crawl into the tunnel and it sways but that's normal.
I continue to crawl through until I feel a hand on my backside, "Nice view," Flynn growls. I laugh but keep going.
"You do know it's safety requirements to be one at a time?"
"Please. . . they could hold 5 people. Besides I wasn't listening to the safety requirements because you freaked out." Once I'm out the other side I turn to see him grinning at me. I kiss him quickly before I let him out the tunnel.
"Yes, zip wire to the ground, hurry." I giggle at his fear of heights. I attach to the wire and push off the edge and feel the rush again. I run again when my feet hit the floor and I detach. I wait for Flynn but he's not budging.
"Oh come on you baby! I thought you wanted to get down!" I yell. I see him take a deep breath and he pushes himself over the edge. I see all his muscles are tense and I just want to hold him and help him relax. He reaches the ground but he doesn't move his legs so he ends up a heap on the floor.
I throw my head back and laugh and he curses under his breath, "Oh come on baby that was funny." I look around us and the place is dead as usual, it's too cold for people this time of year. I like that it's not busy when we go.
He gets up and detaches. He rugby tackles me to the floor and starts tickling me, luckly it's bark underneath us and it's soft. I can't breathe with all the tickling. His weight is pinning me down. "Nope, this is funnier baby."
I hear the zip wire and Tyler lands on his feet in front of us. "What's going on?" Flynn stops tickling me and I suck in a lung full of air and his weight disappears. I hate that I like things like that. The closeness, his warmth.
"He was pissed that I was laughing at his landing." I shrug and Tyler raises his eyebrows and pauses for a moment before he starts laughing. I stand up dusting myself off.
"Yeah, he hasn't mastered those yet." Flynn shoves him with his body and we all laugh. We walk to the next section, it's an assualt course. The first one is wooden poles that get higher with gaps inbetween they look like stairs.
I pick up a run and leap over them hopping to each one, "She isn't normal," Flynn mutters when I leap off the highest one to the ground. Most people do this by climbing them but I'm not normal. I walk to the next one going easy on the two pussy's behind me. I start climbing the net up to the tight rope.
I grab the rope and daggle my body and then hook my calves over the rope. I start moving across the rope. I like the feeling of the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I love working out the way my muscles and lungs burn. I reach the other net and climb down. I look at the other side of the tight rope and Flynn has just started across he seems to cope better with this as he works out and it's not high.
I go to the next one of hurdles. I leap over the high ones by swinging my legs over the wood and using my hands to propel me. I land and crawl over the small ones and repeat the process until I'm finished. I turn to see Flynn doing the opposite. "You're cheating!" I yell back to him.
"How are you so fit? I'm knackered!" he moans.
"I run twice a day and go to the gym. I exercise when I can't sleep because of nightmares. I was built for this," he shakes his head as he catches up to me. I see Tyler doing the same as Flynn, over the small under the big. Am I doing it wrong?
"You sleep well with me."
"Yep, I do." I grin and walk to the next one. It's a muddy pool and you've got to climb over tyres in the middle.
"Nope, I'm not doing that one. I haven't got another pair of trainers," he groans.
"My Mother will wash them. Everything goes in the wash when we get back. Underwear and everything." I whisper the last bit.
"Hmm, tempting." I laugh and I push him into the water and he somehow manages to pull me with him. I scream and he laughs. It's cold but as he holds me he burns me keeping me warm. He pushes me over the tyres and I help pull him over. It's all about team work after all. We wait for Tyler to catch up.
He wades in and he curses, "Fuck, it's cold. Gah," I giggle and we help him over. I push myself off the tyres into the cold water. I swim to the edge and I feel really heavy in these clothes. We walk together to the next one.
I jump onto Tyler's back and he holds the back of my knees. "I love you," I whisper hoping he wouldn't hear me. It was a spare of the moment thing. I'm happy and I guess it makes me more inclined to express my feelings. He snaps his head around to look at me. Oh crap, he heard me. I kiss his cheek and he smiles.
"I love you more." I frown but roll with it, I don't want to argue. He carries me to the next one which is the high wall. He sets me on my feet. My cold clothes cling to me, "I'll go first, I know you aren't keen on this one."
"I just don't get how they expect you to get up there without a rope. I'm too short to jump up there." Flynn holds his hand out to Tyler to help him up. Tyler nods and puts his dirty trainer in Flynn's hand and he lifts Tyler up so he can grab the top of the wall.
Tyler pulls himself up and sits with his legs either side of the wall. He holds his hand down to me. Flynn puts his hand out to me as he did with Tyler. I hold his shoulders whilst I step onto his hands giving him an eyeful of my boobs. I turn as he pushes me up grabbing Tyler's hand. Flynn pushes my foot and pushes my ass as I try push up.
Stupid fucking wall, I've never understood this one. I manage to get up with the assist of Tyler and Flynn. Tyler helps Flynn up as I sit at the top. I look at them as they carry on to the next one. I may be broken but this has been my favourite birthday. I have Flynn with me, I managed to tell my brother that I love him, because I do.
I am now appreciating how easy it was before. I won't take anything for granted like I did. To show affection, to let people in, to enjoy my life. It was always so easy but it makes it much more rewarding to be able to do these things again. I say I love you because it's true not on a whim. I used to say it all the time like it meant nothing. Now it speaks a thousand words.