The Donor

Chapter 26

LAUREN’S POV!

“I love you, baby.”

I thought the woman in my arms had fallen asleep in my arms, hence my uttering of the words I wasn’t yet ready to say to her when awake. The shallowing of her breaths and her tightening arms around my body, she does that when she’s asleep, subconsciously pulling me closer to her. I don’t know when I started to love her but I know I was definitely falling for her even before my birthday weekend, before our first time together. I thought it was safe to say that I loved her. I knew then she wouldn’t have any objections; telling me it’s too early to say things like that, telling me she doesn’t feel the same way. But then she speaks and I know my assumptions about her being asleep were wrong. I know my assumptions about her rejecting me could possibly be true when her answer is something anticipated, and not hoped for.

“Lauren, we need to talk.”

And then my arms tighten around her. Why did I have to say I love her? I couldn’t have waited until the time was more appropriate? When I knew where I stood in terms of her emotion? When she didn’t just reveal to me she kissed her fucking ex-girlfriend? What if she just thinks I’m saying that so I don’t lose her to Abbey? I mean, I don’t want to lose her at all, but there are more reasons for my love besides feeling threatened she’d leave me for someone as perfect as the blonde.

“Lauren?” The young woman lifts her face from my chest to look up at me, her dough brown eyes swimming with her own nerves. I clear my throat to hide the pre-emptive choke in my voice and I blink faster than usual to bat the threatening tears away.

“Of course we can. Maybe we should get out first?” I suggest, referring to the lukewarm bathtub we’ve been sitting in for what must be almost an hour. Camila nods hastily and unwraps herself from my arms, carefully standing up and stepping out of the tub. I can do nothing but admire her body as she does so. Particularly in a situation like this where the possibility of losing her looms. I envy the water droplets that caress her skin.

Camila wanders over to the towel rack, wrapping herself in the warmest one she could find and carries another in her arms for me. She’s turned facing me, still securing the towel around her body and I know she’s waiting for me to follow my request and step out of the tub. The clear moment of hesitation washes my faces and she attempts to hide her huff, but I still hear it, and she reluctantly turns away from me and toward the door, allowing me the privacy I have always required.

“Camila.” I call her name and she turns back around, confusion apparent across her face. It takes seconds. You only need five seconds of bravery, of confidence, and you can achieve so much. In a brief five seconds, I decide to finally give her what she has been secretly hoping I would do for a long time. In a brief five seconds, I choose to stand up from the bathtub while she watches.

Brown eyes lock on mine during the movement of me standing up, and then stepping out of the tub. She watches me the entire time, but doesn’t switch her gaze to the area I so desperately want to cover up, but I don’t – for her. Everything in my mind is telling me to cover myself with my hands, cover the area she isn’t even looking at but can.
Her face is no longer washed with confused, but pride.

I nod softly and after her own brief five seconds, she decides to act on my allowance. Her gaze drops slowly down my body and settles on the area she still had never seen. My body tenses and my eyes move away from her, not wanting to see her honest reaction. I look back at her the same moment she looks back at me, not a second passes until she smiles at me. A smile so soft, so genuine. There’s that look of pride again. She’s proud of me.