A Job With Him

Words Are Harsh, Like Paper Cuts

"Well, I didn't expect us meeting again to turn out like this. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Wayne Ng, the guy who hurt you both in junior college. How have you been Joshua?" Wayne said nonchalantly despite the tension in the situation. I froze and my mouth was agape. I had been talking to the person that ruined my life before this entire time? But he was so different. His personality was so different. He exhibited such a friendly and approachable aura. How on earth could he be the Wayne who threw me onto the ground and gave me death glares whenever he walked by me?

"Huh. Thanks to you, I lost the love of my life 10 years ago. What do you think Wayne?" Josh hissed back. He was holding me at one place with his hand on my wrist. I placed my free hand on that arm and calmed him down. "Josh, it's okay. He was just doing his job as a career counselor. He didn't hurt me in any way so please, relax." Josh was about to say something but Wayne cut him off.

"She's right. I didn't lay a finger on her. That's because I have changed. I'm really sorry for everything I've done in the past. I realised my mistake and it was a coincidence when I became her career counselor. It's not like I could just reject it when the company assigned me to help her. I swear, I didn't plan this or do whatever you were thinking."

Josh took in what Wayne and I said and managed to calm down a little. However, I could see his right fist still tightly clenched. I sighed and pulled out of Josh's grip. I went in between the two boys.

"Look Josh, Wayne didn't do anything so stop getting worked up about him meeting me. He really did help me and I even know what I want to do for a living because of him. What he did in the past was in the past. He has already learnt his lesson and I could see that from the way he was so nice to me." What I said made Josh's mouth go agape. I then turned to Wayne. "I'm sorry Wayne. Josh just misunderstood you. I'm sure you didn't mean any harm on me. I'll text you on when we can meet again to continue where we left off alright? Really sorry for all of this."

I saw Wayne nod his head and smile at me. Then, I quickly grabbed Josh's hand and dragged him outside to the nearby bridge. When I stopped and turned to face him, his eyes were full of hatred and fury. I could see how much he wanted to kill Wayne and how shocked he was when I defended him.

"What the hell Amber? Why did you choose that bastard over me?! He destroyed our relationship before and yet, you apologized to him for my behavior and forgave him?" Josh pulled down his mask and yelled out. I was completely taken aback. I had never seen him get this angry and he never shouted at me about anything before.

"Listen, Josh... He really has changed. After you left and I found out about everything, he was sentenced to jail. I didn't keep in touch with him or my junior college classmates so I didn't know what happened to him after that. However, seeing how he acted when we talked about my career path earlier, I really don't think he is the old Wayne anymore. I didn't even know it was him until you came. So please, he already turned over a new leaf. So can't you do the same and forgive him as well?" I said as I stroked his hand and looked at him pleadingly. I wanted to let go of the past but I guess Josh wasn't ready to do so. What he said next made my heart break.

"Why can't you see that he hasn't changed? He is just acting friendly towards you so that he can hurt us, no, YOU again! Are you that stupid to see past his disguise? Or maybe you like him more than me, that's why you defended him instead of supporting me."

Tears filled my eyes as I became stunned. Without even thinking I said, "You know what Mr Byun Joshua? Maybe I am stupid. That's why I always defended you whenever someone talked about how you left me to become famous. I like him more than I like you? Pfftt... I should've known that you didn't trust me. To you, I'm just someone who would leave you for another man. I've had enough of this." I then turned around and started walking away. Josh realised what he had done and tried to stop me. He grabbed my hand and came in front of me again.

"Look Amber, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh on you. I didn't mean whatever I said earlier. Please, forgive me?" He begged me and I could see the sincerity in his chocolate brown eyes. I looked away from him for a while. How could I just forgive him so easily after he stabbed me with his words? I trusted him so much yet; he couldn't do the same to me.

I faced back to him and looked straight into his eyes. "Look, I need some time to think about all of this. About us. Please, just leave me alone for now," I pushed away his hand and speed-walked all the way to the nearest bus stop. I saw a bus arriving and ran to catch it. I got on it and sat down on the last seat at the back of the bus. I hurriedly plugged in my earphones as the tears I held back earlier fell down. I didn't care about where I was heading. I just needed to get away from him. I thought about everything he said as I sobbed quietly. A song started playing in my earphones. I listened carefully to the lyrics as they calm me down. Soon, I began to fall asleep as the song played.

"...
There aren't any stars in the night sky, so let's cut them out.
The paper cuts in my head are
Illuminated faintly by the light, on the verge of breaking, I fear.
The paper cuts in my head
Can you see
The world we've dreamed of?
..."