I don't want this here to end (Sequel to 'Smiling, like there's nothing wrong')

Part Three

“So are you going to be my bridesmaid, Rheanna?” Rachel asks me, with a smile, her teeth glistening in the light.

“Yeah why not?” I ask her.

“Well I don’t know. Do you want to come dress shopping with me then?” she asks. I take a deep breath before nodding. I can’t really say no, can I? This is for Jay after all. I mean he is Nathan’s best friend after all. It’s only right for me to try and get on his right side.

“Come on then” she says, as she stands up.

“What now?” I ask her, with my eyebrow raised.

“Rachel, I thought you were going tomorrow, though?” Jay asks her, also looking confused. I can tell what their night consist of, just looking at the pair of them. It would be them two sitting on the sofa, watching Avatar and every couple of seconds, her interrupting with things like “What’s that?”, “Why are they blue?” and even “I don’t get it Jay! Can we watch sex in the city instead?”

“No, I want to go now” she says again.

“But the shop will be shut now. It’s half nine” Jay tells her. Her face scrunches up for a second, and then it relaxes again.

“Oh yeah” she says, as she sits back down, next to Jay.

“So how did you two meet?” I ask, with a smirk.

“Well me and Jay used to go to dance school together years ago and then we recently caught up on twutter” she says, as I try to keep a straight face.

“You mean twitter?” I ask her.

“No, twutter. It’s a website where you send each other twuts and you can talk to people” she says. I don’t know what was worse the fact that she called it twutter or the fact that she said the same thing twice, only using different words.

“She means twitter” Jay confirmed. Wow, going dress shopping is going to be hard work.

“So how did you meet? Was it at school too?” she asks and at that moment I see a smirk forming across Jay’s face and then his mouth starts to move slightly.

“Outside the school gates” he giggles to himself.

“What?” Nathan asks defensively. Jay looks shocked by this and shakes his head.

“I didn’t mean it. It was just a joke” she says, but Jay knows that Nathan would never have found that funny. We had a hard enough time when all the papers were accusing him of being a paedophile and with a throw away comment like that, it isn’t surprising. Not to be mean, but Rachel isn’t the smartest person in the world and she would probably believe Jay’s little comment, which would live us with nothing but more bad publicity.

“Did you really meet her outside the school gates, Nathan?” Rachel asks and I see in her eyes that she’s serious.

“No!” Nathan says, bitterly before standing up and storming out of the room. I turn my head towards the door, where he left and I hear him stomping off up the stairs. That usually means that he’s especially annoyed. I would go up and see if he’s ok, but at the end of the day, we have quests and it’s rude to leave them down here alone.

“Sorry” Jay says, as she looks over at me and I can see that he’s genuinely sorry, but he shouldn’t have said that in the first place, should he?

“Oh give it a rest Jay, we both know you’re not sorry” I say, bitterly.

“What? Yes I am” he insists.

“You’re just upset that he stormed off, you wouldn’t care if he didn’t and besides if you were a true friend to Nathan, you wouldn’t say things like that to him, would you?” I ask him and with that he looks down at his lap. I know he’s sorry, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to let him get away with it.

“Maybe I should leave” Jay says, and with that he stands up and trails towards the door. I follow him, where I watch him walk out of the door. I close the door behind him and as I walk back into the living room, I can’t help feeling slightly bad about the whole thing.

“Hey” I hear Rachel say, which snaps me out of my thoughts and back to reality. I forgot Rachel was here. If I hadn’t, I would have made sure she left with Jay, but now this is awkward.

“Oh hey. Jay’s just left, shouldn’t you be following him?” I ask her. I don’t want to sound rude, but I really don’t want her to stay here with just me and Nathan. She seems weird and I can’t be dealing with people who are stupid. No offense to her, she’s just not got the same brain capacity as the rest of us humans.

“No, that’s ok. I can stay here for a while longer” she says, as she picks her bag off of the floor and puts it on her lap. She then pulls out a compact mirror and begins to do her make up.

“Seriously though, haven’t you got places to go?” I ask her, still trying not to sound rude.

“Nope” she replies, whilst putting lip gloss on her lip and as her mouth closes again, her hand slips and the lip gloss ends up going all over her chin. She puts the lip gloss back in her bag, like she didn’t even realise.

“You’ve got a little bit of lip gloss on your chin” I tell her, but she just wipes her forehead and then smiles at me. “Got it” I say, sarcastically.

“Thanks Rheanna” she smiles. At that moment I have an idea.

“What’s that?” I say, looking around me.  I knew this would make her leave.

“What?” she asks, also looking around the room!

“I think I can hear Jay calling you” I tell her and then she stops looking and looks back into her bag. “He’s got cookies” I add and at that moment she jumps up from the chair and runs off out of the room. Where the hell did Jay pick her up from? She’s not right.

Once she’s gone, I take this opportunity to go and see how Nathan is. After all, he was pretty upset about that comment earlier. When I get to our room, I knock lightly on the door.

“What?” he asks, from inside the room.

“Can I come in?” I ask him. Even though it’s my room too, I think it’s only fair for me to ask him whether I can enter. After all I wouldn’t want him barging in, if I was upset.

“Yeah” he says and I can tell from his voice that the comment got to him. I open the door slowly and then I walk inside the room. I find Nathan lying on the bed, with his phone in his hand. I close the door behind me and then I walk over to the bed. I sit down on my side, with my legs crossed.

“What are you looking at?” I ask him, trying not to look, in case he tries to hide it from me.

“Oh just pictures” he tells me, as he rolls over, so he’s now facing up. He then sits up next to me. I smile at him and then he turns his phone screen so I can see it.

“When did we take that?” I ask him. It’s a picture of me and him in a park. We look so happy and I just wish things weren’t so complicated. We haven’t even had a chance to do everything couples do. We can’t go out and kiss in public, we can’t tell everyone that we’re engaged and to top it off, we have to sit back whilst the whole world judges us and it kills me.

“That was in Scotland, remember?” he says. We went there just after Nathan proposed to me. We figured we needed to get away so we could start our relation ship on the best note possible. I thought everything would have blown over when we got home, but it didn’t. Everyone was just the same as before and they hated what me and Nathan had. The fans tried to stick up for Nathan, but as for me? I had no one. The only person I have left is Nathan and I can’t lose him too. I love him so much and I just hope he feels the same way about me. Sure he might say he does, but he also said that to Shauna didn’t he and look how that turned out.

“Yeah, I remember” I say quietly.

“Everything was so simple out there, so perfect. We didn’t have to hide from anyone and we could be whoever we wanted to be. I wish we still had that” Nathan sighs.

“Me too. No one accepts us and it kills me, but we have to keep trying we can’t give up on us” I tell him. I can’t let him give up because then I’ll have nothing. I love Nathan and everything, but if I lose him, I lose everything. That’s why I don’t care whether I love him or not, I need him.

“I know” he sighs, as he gently pulls my head into his chest.