chemical

28.

Halfway through the treatment i was already feeling miserable. I was nauseous and felt like i was going to pass out at any moment.

"You okay?" Calum asked when he noticed that i was unwell.

"Not really." I mumbled to him. I closed my eyes and layed with my head back.

"Just one more hour and it will all be over."

I doubted if i was going to make it till then. My eyes where already closed so i tried to sleep my way through the hour.

Calum gently shook my awake. "You're done for today."

My first instinct was to look at my arm to see if the needle was still there.

"I just removed it. I didn't want to wake you because i thought that you might need the sleep." He explained to me.

"I did, i had an another nightmare last night." I mumbled to him as i tried to ignore the fact that the room was spinning.

"Was it the same one as before?"

I shook my head. "It was a new one. It was about my parents and them wanting to take me out of here. They tried to bury me alive."

Calum layed his hand on my back. "It sounds to me like your parents are doing more bad than good."

I ignored his answer, i felt too miserable to have this conversation right now.

"Can we please go to my room?"

"Of course, I'll help you up."

He grabbed both of my hands and basically pulled me out of my chair. I felt way to tired to walk and Calum noticed that.

"Is it alright if i carry you?"

I nodded.

He carefully picked me up bridal style and walked to my room.

"How do you feel?" He aksed as he put my down on my bed.

"Extremely nauseous and dizzy."

"I'm going to give you an IV just incase you start to trow up." He explained.

I didn't argue with him because i wouldn't win anyways. I just had to accept that fact that there was going to be an needle in my arm for the next for hours.

After he was done with the IV he handed me a pill. "You need to let it dissolve in your mouth, it will help with the nauseous."

I did as he said even though the pill itself made me want to trow up.

"I think It's best if i leave you alone so you rest for a while."

"I think so too."

He covered me with my blanket. "I'll be back before you know it."

I tiredly waved him goodbye. I wasn't tired enough to take a nap so i decided to turn the tv on.

Not even an hour later there was a knock at the door. I first thought that i was Calum but i was wrong. It was Alice.

Alice walked in the room with a feeding tube. It was a sad sight to see.

"Not feeling well?" She asked as she sat down on the edge of my bed.

"Not really, i had chemo this morning. You also don't look that well."

She looked embarrassed at the ground. "I hate this stupid tube, it makes me realise how sick i actually am."

"I feel guilty for not helping you." I said to her.

She looked up at me and shook her head. "You don't need to help me in that way. You only need to be my friend and you're doing an wonderful job with that."

"I don't think sneaking you out the hospital or letting you use my scale is called being a good friend."

"That's exactly what a good friend is. You listen to me and try to make me happy in every way possible. I just get happy about the wrong things. But that has nothing to do with you, you're an amazing person and an even better friend."

I smiled at her, she doesn't deserve the shit she's going through.

She suddenly stood up and walked to the window.

"It's snowing!" Alice said excited as she looked outside.

I also looked at the window to see it for myself. It was indeed snowing.

I sighed and looked down at my fingers. I hated the snow because it meant that Christmas was coming.

"You're not happy that it is snowing?" She asked when she saw my sad face.

"I'm just not a big fan of the holiday's that come with snow."

"I know what you mean. I also don't really like Christmas or Thanksgiving. All that stupid food and then those family members that you only see once a year."

"Are you going home for Christmas?" I aksed her.

She nodded. "I'm going home for tree days to celebrate Christmas with my family. What about you?"

"I don't know. I think that I'm staying here."

"That doesn't sound like a lot of fun."

I smiled at her."It does to me. Just image how quiet and cosy it will be in here."

"If you say so."

I'd much rather spent Christmas in here then at home. Every year my mom would dress me up up some ridiculous outfit. She would take pictures for atleast 2 hours until she had the right one that could be posted. It was even worse if i had to do actual photoshot or some stupid commercial.

There was a knock at the door, it was Calum.

"How are my girl's doing?" He aksed with a smile.

"I'm doing better than Kate." Alice said to him.

"Really?" He asked as he looked at me.

I shrugged. "Let's just see that I've felt better but also worse."

Calum smiled as he sat down on the chair next to me bed.

The fun didn't last for long beacuse Alice's doctor knocked on my door. "Your mom is here to see you Alice."

Alice immediately jumped up with a big smile. "Finally."

"Bye Kate, I'll speak to you soon." She said to me as she walked out if the room.

I simply smiled and waved her goodbye. I kinda missed my parents or atleast the warm feeling that is suppose to come with a family.

"Everything alright?" Calum asked me.

I shook my head with tears in my eyes. "Why can't my parents just be normal?"

"I don't think there is such a thing as normal parents. Everybody has flaws even parents. "

I relaxed my head on Calum shoulder. "I really don't feel well."

"I know you don't but i can't give you any more medicine than you already have. Try to get some sleep mabye that will help a little."

I sighed, it felt like nothing was going to help at the moment.

"I'll try."

"Thank you."

He stood up and tucked my into bed. "You did an excellent job today Kate. I'm proud of you."

I thankfully smiled. "Goodnight Calum."

"Goodnight Kate, I'll see you in the morning."