chemical

36.

In what felt like the far distant i heard people talk to each other. But i soon realised that Calum and Ashton were in fact standing next to my bed. Their voices weren't hard to recognize even when i was half awake.

"Was i alseep?" I aksed completely disorientated to the both of them.

"Yes you were, for quite a while exactly." Calum spoke in a kind voice.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled as i sat up. Which i soon realized was a mistake, my entire body felt sore.

I felt weird, i didn't feel pain or anything it was a feeling that wasn't able to recognize.

"You don't need to apologise for falling asleep. I'm happy that you did." Calum said.

"How are you feeling?" Ashton asked.

I was unsure of he exactly meant so i gave him a safe answer. "I've had better days."

He smiled and nodded. "That's one way to say it."

"I feel weird. It's a feeling i can't quite explain." I said to him.

"You're probably feeling the medicine who are making you numb. You aren't feeling the pain that should be there." Ashton explained.

"Mabye."

"Where's Michael?" I asked.

"He's at home, probably sleeping." Calum answered.

This confused me a bit. "What time is it?"

"It's 9 in the morning. Michael will be here in the afternoon."

I looked at the window which was useless because the blinds where stilled closed.

Ashton noticed this and walked to the window to let some light in. I was happy when he did that, it reminded me that life was still continuing.

"It's snowing again." He said as he looked outside.

The little bit of happiness i felt a moment ago left, snow wasn't something nice.

"You're aren't really a winter person, are you?" Calum aksed.

I shook my head. "Not really. I do like the cold wheater but i hate the days it has to happen in."

"Will your parents visit you tomorrow when it is Thanksgiving?" Ashton asked a he sat back down next to my bed.

"I don't really care of they do or don't. I always hated that holiday, it feels useless when you don't like your family or aren't allowed to eat what you want."

"How did you used to celebrate Thanksgiving when you were younger?"

"Like when i was 7?" I asked Ashton.

"Yes, when you still lived with your biological mom."

"My mom and i would bake a pie together that would be too horrid to eat. It wasn't about huge meals or seeing family. It was about having a good laugh. We used to celebrate Christmas the same way. No presents bought with money and no family other than the people we shared the house with."

"Do you miss those days?" Calum aksed.

"I think i do but even those days had their flaws. Just not as many as the days have now."

"What exactly do mean by saying that?"

"That making a pie together didn't almost make a perfect Thanksgiving. Because after that i released that there was no one to eat it with. It was just me, my mom and her boyfriend."

Ashton was about to say something but i cut him off. "Can i use the phone? I want to call somebody."

Calum didn't hesitate to hand me his phone. "Are you going to call your parents?" He asked.

I shook my head as i dailed the number. "River."

"We'll give you some privacy." He whispered with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes as they both tiptoed out of the room. As if i was going to have an intimate conversation with River.

"Hello who is this?" He said confused over the phone.

"It's Kate calling with Calum's phone."

"Oh hey, how's going?"

"I feel weird. All i have to is lay in bed with needles in me."

"Doesn't sound like a fun. Are you in any pain?"

"No, Calum said that I'm pain medication so i don't really feel anything. But i do feel quite sore for some reason."

River chuckled when i said that. "Mabye your body thinks that you're finally working out."

"Haha very funny." I said sarcastic.

"I'm sorry i just needed to get it out of my system."

"Are you excited for Thanksgiving?"

"I'm afraid it's going to be a total shit show but I'll be happy to finally eat some good food. I just know that all my family memberas are either going to make jokes about my leg or feel sorry for me."

"What do want them to do?"

He was silent for a second. "I want them to see as they did a few years ago."

"How does it feel to be home?"

"Amazing, i really missed my own room without any beeping noises. But it's not the same without you." He said changing his tone to a sad one.

"I feel the same here. Without you and Alice gone i feel kinda alone. But I'm thankful to have the most amazing doctors by my side."

"If you didn't have that stupid transplant you would've been able to come home with me."

I ignored him because i had something better to tell him. "My biological mom is in the hospital right now." I said with a smile. It made me even happier when i said it out loud.

"Wait really? Is she there with you right now?" He asked.

"No she said that she doesn't want to meet me until she's ready. But she was the one who donated her bone marrow to me. That's why she's in the hospital."

"Omg Kate that's amazing. I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you. Calum was the one who contacted her and brought her here. Mandy of course gave him the address but i refuse to give her any credit."

The longer the conversation lasted, the more tired i got. But it wasn't the kind if tired that sleep would fix.

"Hey I'm sorry but i have to go." I said to River.

"I'll speak to you soon. Hang in there, keep fighting for me."

Him saying this made me smile and have me a warm feeling. "Bye River."

He also said goodbye before i hung up the phone.

Calum must've been eavesdropping because after i had hung he immediately entered my room

"Where's Ashton?" I aksed Calum when he closed the door behind him.

"He went to talk to your mom to see how's she's going. You know, mentally."

I nodded. I hoped that Ashton was able to get her ready to talk to me.

"Has she changed?" I aksed Calum.

He thought about the question before he answered. He knew that my mom could better answer these questions herself.

"I didn't know your mother like you did. I only knew her from pictures and stories. But she seemed healthier when i met her."

That answer was good enough for me.

I figeted with my hands as i thought about what to say to my mom.

"You're nervous." Calum as he glanced at my heart monitor.

"When do i get to go back to my room?" I aksed dodging his statement.

"After all the cells are tranported and when we are able to give you a smaller dose of medication." He said.

"I really hope that this whole thing is working."

"Only time will tell." He answered.