UNKNOWN PAIN

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Z: "ASH!" he yelled, standing in the doorway, whilst I jump out of my car and rush inside. Getting blown away by the wind and my shoes getting soaked by the flooded streets. Z: "Come inside quick!" A: "This weather is absolutely ridiculous." Z: "I know right. I'll get you something warm to drink." 

We sat in his room, led up by his LED lights, listening to Frank Ocean. Laughing till we cried and talking about the most random shit...but truly...ever thought about how small we actually are? How we're literally chilling on a huge ass rock, floating in a space of nothing but stars and other fucking rocks? And ...How did humans come up...with an entire system, whilst we could've just like-chilled? I guess, people are to selfish for a world without a system, yet I wonder if it would work? It was nostalgic, it felt like I was 16 again, hanging with Zach for hours on end. I looked at him and smiled. Z: "I really did miss this Ash." I nodded and pushed him jonkingly. A: "Hungry for some pop tarts?" 

 A: "Hungry for some pop tarts?" 

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Z: "Ride slow please. I still think this isn't safe." A: "Don't worry. It's a short drive. I'll text you when I'm home!" I hop in my car and put the old one direction album on max volume. Loudly singing. As I reached the highway, my stomach began to grumble. Was I about to have my period? like seriously now? I ignored it, but with every minute the aching worsened. The urge to throw up grew. I tried focussing on the road, but it took so much energy to focus on the distance between me and the car in front. Scared off what was happening, I decided to move lanes slowly and pull over. I was suprised that I was able to concentrate enough for that. I sat and breathed slowly..in and out. Focussing on my hands, which were shaking. Come on Ash...you're okay. I was trying to convince myself that I was okay...but every symptom kept coming back the second I thought it was gone, making me cuddle up with my knees more in believe it would reduce the pain that worsened each time. What the hell? I opened the door and walked off to a patch of grass, where I threw up. Again and again. Make it stop. Embarrassed, but so miserable, I tried pulling myself up. But everything was shaking, I lied down, rain splashing down. I tried standing up, believe me...I knew it was not smart to be outside, in the pouring rain and rushing winds, feeling like this, but my body froze. All I could focus on was my breathing. Make it stop please, make it stop. 

?: "Ma'dam, are you okay?" I opened my eyes, confused ?: "Here drink water, I'm calling the ambulance. Try to stay awake. You're going to be okay." I tried...but my eyelids felt heavy and I wanted to drift away in the darkness, numbing the pain by sleep. 



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