There is no me without you (a supercorp Fanfiction)

Chapter 51

*smutt warning in this chapter*

Kara POV

I heard the door to the lab close. I focused so hard on my hearing. I didn't want Lena to hurt herself. I could hear quiet sobbing conking from the lab. I drop my head into my hands. I royally messed this up. I can feel the burn over my heart. The one where our souls mate is rejecting you. I deserve every bit of Pain it brings. I just accused Lena of being like her brother. I did the one thing I never thought I would! Now I'm like everyone else in her life. I'm just sitting here starting at the floor. I've messed this up so badly. This is one of those times I wish I was still in krypton when it exploded. I've never shared these feeling with anyone. I can't believe I said that. I'm meant to stand for hope. I'm meant to be brave and strong. I'm meant to be loyal and faithful. But I'm just a person. A messed up person that doesn't believe in there own girlfriend. Maybe Lena would be better off without me in her life. Tears start falling quickly and quietly from my eyes. I just couldn't move. My heart hurt. Lena do deserve so much better than that! She needs someone better than me. I feel a pair of soft hands on my shoulder. I couldn't bare to look up and see the pain I chased her in her eyes. This was it. She was done. I press my hands against my head to make the pressure higher. To cause pain. I can see her bare feet under my eyes. I close them. I try to build a wall for my emotions. To make it hurt less for Lena.
"Babe why are you crying?" Leans whispered panicked.
I don't look up. I don't move. I can't. The fear of losing her is too great. My heart beats a little faster. I don't look up. I don't say anything. I can't. I've already messed up everything beyond repair. I've lost Alex, my mum and both of my adopted parents too. Losing Lena is going to break me worse than all of them put together. Losing her is like losing krypton all over again. I open my eyes. Praying to rao that she left. She is kneeling in front of me. She places on hand on my thigh and reaches up gently to wipe away my tears. My heart beats faster. The walls closing in. I don't know what is happening to me. Lena quickly grabs my hands.
"Focus on my heart beat. Breathe with me" she says softly. Her voice was horse but I could hear the love in there still. I focus on her heart beat. Thump. Thump. Thump. Like the steady beat of a drum. So safe. I take a deep breath as the same time as Lena does. My chest isn't as tight. She gently squeezes my hands. She keeps whispering sweet thing to me. I slowly start to calm down. She moves both of our hands away from my face. She gasps.
"Babe, why were you pressing your hands so tightly into your head? You have big read hand marks there." She says softly, her voice laden with guilt.
"You deserve better." I said Barkly above a whisper.
"Kara, babe. You are perfectly imperfect. Nothing you could ever do would make me leave. I love you so much that it hurts so badly." She says sweetly whipping away the tears from my eyes. I look at her. She was there even after what I did. She truely was amazing.
"Babe you carry the weight of two worlds on your shoulders. I will always be here to help you. I will have you back forever. Through the good and the bad." She whispered. It felt like something in my heart had finally repaired itself. It felt like I was home again. I gently pull her up so she was straddling my lap. I gently kiss her. Trying to show her what she means to me. "I love you Kara Zor-el" she breathes against my lips. My eyes flutter shut. Her lips gently capture mine. I could hear both of our heart beats increase. Her lips telling me, showing me that she loves me. She rests one hand gently on my cheek, her other hand between my legs softly running her fingertips up the inside of my thigh. I sigh completely content in this perfect moment. Lena kissing me deeper as she grazes her nails down my back, I whimper gently. Our kiss heats up when I pull Lena closer into me, as she straddles me, running her fingers through my hair to my back digging her nails in while she begins to gently thrust against me. I let out a moan with the tremble of pleasure moving through my body, never have I been so turned on. I place my hands gently, cautiously under her shirt. Feeling her soft, perfect skin. She shudders against me when I reach the bottom of her shirt. I lean back to look into her eyes. To ask if this was ok. She hurriedly nodded starting to kiss my neck. I rip her shirt off leaving it in pieces on the floor. Lena uncontrollably gasps in my ear.