The Blonde Alpha

FORTY ONE

I drag my feet to my room, wanting to take as long as possible to get there.

Beccas words were feeding to my human insecurities , and my wolf was trying everything to stop me from heading into that dark space.

You are the Queen, you need to be confidant.

Her voice rings through my mind, I cross a mirror in the hall and stopped, I needed to get a good look at myself.

Being a Queen, I couldn't give Alec a child right now, I can not make Alec King, that just not how this works. I close my eyes as I feel a warm tear slide down my cheek.

In my heart I knew that I wanted to give Alec the choice, I wanted him to have what his heart desires, what he thinks is best.

Why?

Because I love him.

Even if he chooses to go, even if he still loves her.

I can rule for long, I can always pass the throne on to my niece or nephew...maybe even adopt, there are countless homeless werewolves.

Alone, like me.

I wipe my tears and turn to my room, as soon as I push the door open I make eye contact with Alec's rich green eyes.

"Hi," I whisper, stepping into the room.

I walk over to my desk and place the crown down before trying to remove my hair clips.

Alec walks over to my , he glances at my face through the mirror before placing his hands on my shoulders and turning me around.

"How are you." His voice, husky, but still with that inch of cockyness.

"I'm ok, tired, today is been long."

Alec leans downs and kissed my forehead, wrapping his arms around me for a hug, " I want you to remember something my rojo, I love you."

I smiled against his body, " I'm trying to keep remembering that." I whisper

Alec pulls away and rests his hand in my cheek, " you still have to remind yourself that I love you?" He asks, his voice starting to have a hard tone.

I pull back and shake my head, causing my hair to fall over my shoulders, " I don't mean it like that it's just that Bec-"

"Oh stop it Renezmaé!" He shouts, pulling away from me , " what do I need to keep doing for you to believe me, I said I loved you, I left my alpha position for you, I parted from my best friend , my life for you, for Damn sake I even slept with you!"

His word hit me like a pack of knives, he just basically repeated what Becca said, he did leave his life for me.

"I'm sorry you made so many sacrifices for me." I took a deep breath, " but I'm not that type of women, if you believe sleeping with me is the way to show love only then you are highly mistake."

"I'm tired of this Renézmae, I'm tired of going in circles with you, trying to prove my love only for you to question it, to question me."

Now my tears were rolling down my face.

"Iv never had anyone constant in my life."

"Oh stop giving me that, you can't hide behind you past all the time." He paused, " do you love me."

I nod, " I love you more than I love myself."

He steps closer to me and angrily shoved my hair behind my ears before gripping my face, " you love me but not trust me."

"I do trust you!" I tell.

"Then you spent the entire day deliberating with your staff, coming up with ways in which you could stop me from going with Rebecca? She needs some support now."