Incarcerated

Chapter 17

Not being able to attend Jordan's funeral was the biggest heart break for me. I was sentenced to 3 months in jail because I wouldn't talk or tell on the robberies we was doing. I haven't even opened my mouth to say a word to anybody. I felt so empty inside. Jas was fighting to get custody of my daughter but Jayden told her if she did she would have to leave. I can't believe my own brother was treating me like this. The shit hurted so bad. I felt hopeless.

I had ended up going upstate last week. Prison was not for me at all. I really just stayed in my bunk all day. I didn't talk to anybody or tried to make friends. Girls here thought I was weird or stuck up. Truth be told I was just defeated and hurting. My soul was crying and breaking down.

Heyy new girl.! This girl said coming over to me. She was my bunkie.

Heyy.! I said looking up from my notebook.

What's good? You alright.?

Yeah I'm fine, thanks.!

Me and my girls going out to rec you wanna come.?

No I'm okay thank you.!

Nah I ain't asking you I'm telling you.! You always in here writing and Shit you don't talk or do anything. Being in here can really fuck your mind up. Come on we cool.! She said taking my book closing it and pulling me up.

Okay.! I laughed a little. She pulled me to the line to line up to go outside. I really didn't wanna go out here at all. They opened the door and we went out. I followed the three girls to the bench and tables.

Heyy newbie.! The one girl said sitting on the table taking a cigarette out.

Hi.! I smiled slightly.

Y'all this my bunckie Promise, P that's Kayla, Shi'era, and this Mama.!

Hi y'all.! I waved.

What you in for.? Mama asked.

You smoke.? Kayla asked.

No, and umm I guess for not telling on my boyfriend. I said as I bit my lip.

Damnn for what.? Mama asked.

Ummm some robberies I guess.

What the fuck....so how much time they tryna give y'all.? Bianca asked.

Well he was murdered and.....they gave me three months.! I said trying not to cry.

Awww I'm sorry boo.! Mama said getting up and hugging me.

I just wished they had let me go to his funeral. I said wiping the tears out my eyes.

What happened.? Shi'erra asked. "If you don't mind me asking"

We had just had a baby and she needed milk. We ended up going to the store together. I sat in the car and he went in......It all happened so fast..... I don't know what happened inside the store but he was shot three times in front of me....I cradled his dying body until the police showed.....they showed no mercy on him....they didn't ask me any questions.....they just cuffed me like I was apart of the robbery or something. My daughter was 5 days old and they just booked me and she went into the system that night. I wasn't aloud to go to his funeral and they said since I didn't wanna talk that they was gonna give me three months in jail....... I said wiping my tears. This is the first time I ever said what happened out loud. They all got up to hug and comfort me.

Damn now I know why you always quiet and sad looking. I'm sorry bro.! Bianca said hugging me tighter.

This has literally been hell for me and I don't know how to handle this.