January 5, 2012
Dear Louis,
It's Thursday. We used to have marching band today. Our longest practice of the week before the game on Friday night. Football season was the best. Remember when we met? We were both so scared, I a child of 15, you almost a man at 16. My mom disliked you so much at first. She used to cry as much as I did the first days. Whether for her child's grief or her own I do not know. We all miss you so much.
Did it hurt? I mean the whole thing. You cut your wrists and took pills. Why both? Why not just one? To ensure your chance of survival was zero? I asked the ER doctor and he said if you had just done your wrists or only taken the pills you would of had a 5% chance of surviving.
Did you think of me? I know it's a selfish question but it won't leave my mind. If you thought of your parents, or your sister? Her young innocent face, once so full of life and beauty is now lifeless, hopeless. Her only protector, her only family, her only true friend. I should go see her. I've seen her sitting with you in the evenings after I go so Dr. Silver. She's so sad. We're so sad. I'll go see her. I promise.
I found a box of our old pictures this morning. I couldn't look at them so they're sitting on my desk. I just stare at them, to frightened of the memories, too scared to remember you that clearly. When I close my eyes I can still see your face. Your handsome, angular face always tan from marching outside. I remember the day Senior Chief made you choose between marching band and ROTC. You always loved band more. I think. I think I just smiled. Just a tiny bit. It's gone.... Just like you.
Always, Only, Forever Yours,
Mai <3
YOU ARE READING
Without You
عاطفيةUNDER EDITING: Mairenn and Louis had been together for a while. Neither of them kept track of the time. Mairenn knew Louis struggled with suicide and guilt over his parents leaving him and his sister when they were young. She loved him and supported...
