BTS ~ 𝘚𝘦𝘰𝘬 𝘚𝘰𝘯𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘯 || Seven Deadly Sins || Mafia AU

thirty three.

Minji's pov.

I was glad to wake up in my bed. It was just getting bright out, and I released a silent curse at how long I had slept, but since no-one had woken me up, I assumed it was fine. I had a quick shower before going down the stairs, only to find many people dotted about. That was how it was to be over the next while. Crowed and cramped.  I entered the dining hall as per usual, and, to my surprise, all five of the boys were present. "Good morning," Namjoon acknowledged as I entered, and I smiled at him. "Morning," I replied, sitting down. Small talk was being exchanged, but you could tell that each boy's mind was focusing on things other than the chit-chat about the weather and the food. As I was served, I turned to Jimin.

"You're not out training yet?" I questioned. Jimin shook his head. "Namjoon was just talking to us about a few things. We're going to in a little bit, though, if you wanna join?" I turned my head in Namjoon's direction, not fully paying attention to the question Jimin had asked me.

What had he told them?

I knew it wasn't my place to ask, so I said nothing. I accepted Jimin's offer to train, but requested to focus on working out rather than combat or shooting, due to the harsh winds and the cooler air outside. He nodded, and told me that Taehyung and Hoseok were planning take the soldiers out on some kind of training session in the gardens farther from the house, and that we would most likely have the area to ourselves. I smiled at the thought. The buzz and loud atmosphere the building had transformed into over the past few days hadn't exactly been a calming one.

After we got a chance to properly digest our food, Jimin and I headed to the training room, and, as he had predicted, it was empty. Jimin put on some music as I made my way to one of the treadmills. I decided to work on my stamina before my strength. After all, if they couldn't catch me, they couldn't kill me, right?

As I began to run, I wondered who the 'they' I seemed so fearful of were. Were they the Bangtans, my actual enemies? They couldn't be, right? I mean, I had shot one of theirs dead and they did nothing but nod. Was it the Seoks? No, that didn't seem right, although after everything I'd done, I was definitely considered a traitor to my own clan. I just hoped they would see that everything I did was what I had thought to be right at that specific moment. Not just for me, but for them too.

I thought back to the very beginning.

I had been stubborn and angry. I hadn't shared information without some sort of force. I had been a little bit lost and I had probably answered some of the Bangtan's unsaid questions in my sarcastic blabbering, but I had felt nothing more than rage for the boys. Which shouldn't have changed since.

But it had.

I suppose willingly staying and not even attempting to escape the premises had been a mistake, but I knew it would be a fruitless quest anyway. Making friends with Hoseok was a questionable decision, but even weeks later I didn't feel any sort of threat that came from that. I thought back on Hoseok's words he had given me at the beginning.

"If I could prevent this, I would, truly."

I did genuinely believe he meant it.
I do genuinely believe he means it.

As for the whole ball incident, I couldn't have prevented that if I tried. Its not like I knew that I would be taken by the very group that had caused the ball in the first place. While I was with the Choi's, I had nearly let myself go. I remembered Yeonjun's gun to my head, and Taehyung coming to rescue me. The damsel in distress. I didn't want to be the damsel. I wanted to save myself, but I had no reason to. The two things I had thought of living for had been for my father and my group... but I didn't necessarily care for them as much as I had initially thought, either.

I thought of the brief romantic interaction I had shared with Jimin. It was odd, and it was definitely a spur of the moment thing on my end, which resulted in much tension, but was it the same for Jimin? Of course it was, it had to be - but even having momentary attraction towards one of the seven men gave me an uneasy feeling in my stomach. Despite this, I could not deny that I had felt for them. I had been feeling for them. Not just romantically, but as friends too. And that is what made my situation one thousand times worse.

Finding and killing one of my Grandfather's killers is the only bit of justice I served in the hands of my captors, and even then it was under their knowing and somewhat consent. That had been one thing. But, almost as if in return, I had killed Deok-Su. Oh, Deok-Su. How I had tried to push him to the back of my mind. He was the only person ever truly there for me.  I knew that my killing him was better than the other fate he was to serve, which was being sniped off by the driver on that very same night. I had killed him because it was the choice that was the least terrible. But I had still killed him. The one who had been by my side forever. My hope.

I thought of Namjoon and his actions, and realized that my time in the Bangtan building hadn't been easy or smooth sailing either, but in my eyes I got off lightly. Too lightly. I wondered how different it would've been if I had died somewhere along the line. If Yeonjun had pulled the trigger before Taehyung arrived. If I had tried to escape and been killed for the attempt. If I didn't get out of the room with Namjoon when I did. If Sungho had successfully slit my throat.

"Even though we can't see the end, we must go to the end."

The words of a song I had never heard before echoed through the room. I then realized I had been running fast, too fast, sprinting even, on the treadmill. I continued listening to the words of the song.

"On this path without a map,
It's a maze, don't wanna look back
Only looking forward as we run
Shining through the darkness."

As I slowed the machine down, I thought about the words I had just heard. I felt Jimin's eyes on me, and I got the feeling that he had been watching me the whole time, attempting to evaluate my thoughts, but, as the mystery song had chanted, I continued to look forward. I proceeded with my running to the slow music.

"Practice goes harder once night comes."

I almost laughed at the words, noticing how true they were to my story. Not only the literal meaning of the words, but how I felt about them. Sure, I had been up training until late hours recently, but most Mafia business happens at night, too. Most of the incidents I could recall happened when the sun went down. My capture, the ball, Deok-Su's murder. Was this all practice? Practice for something greater, something more terrifying to come?

"Look at the night sky, look at the stars,
It's like us, shining brighter in the darkness."

I wished I could see the stars at that moment in time. They would've reminded me of Deok-Su, how they always did since his death. I realized then why I had been running so fast before. I was trying to escape whatever problems I was facing. Everything in my life had seemed like such a mess over that time period, and before that even. I thought of how I had been roaming the streets before my capture, how that was the only taste of freedom I had received until then. Oh, how the tables had turned, in a sarcastic kind of way. I was captured, but I felt more free then I ever had before.

"Days of silence flow and then we all practice again."

I thought about this. Would it be the same for the war? After Thursday, what was to happen? Would it be a while of quiet before another task would arise? Where would I even be? Would I even be? As If the song understood me, the next line came at me like a large gust of wind.

"What will be the result of our practice?"

Before I knew it, the phrase hit me again.

"Even though we can't see the end, we must go to the end."

And that's when I made the decision.

No matter what side I fight on, no matter how I come across to others, I must fight. I must fight for myself. Not my family, or my father, or the boys, or anyone else but myself.

I thought for a moment.

Your fate isn't based on the decisions made for you by others.
Living, dying, it's all on you.
You must choose your own future...

... and I was not about to let myself become a fragment of history.