Pandemonium | Dream SMP

01. Isn't Ares supposed to be a man's name?

"So this is the Dream SMP." I wonder aloud, gazing down at the mass of structures that stretch out before me.

"Heh, if you think it looks impressive now, wait till you actually get down there," Schlatt smirks, sticking his hands in his suit pockets as he admires the view alongside me.

"Has it changed much since the first time you were here?" I question, glancing sidelong to my travel companion. He hums lowly and puts a hand to his chin, studying the layout of the land.

"Actually, it looks like it got uglier."

I laugh lightly, readjusting my grip on the enchanted trident that sits across my shoulders.

Schlatt turns to smirk at me.

"God I love that laugh."

"I know. You only tell me every day." I hum with a roll of my eyes.

"Only cause it's true."

I smile warmly up at him. I'll be the first to admit that we're an odd pair. A goat-man and a warrior girl. It sounds like the start of a bad joke. But we take solidarity in the fact we're so different, both from each other and those around us. It's a bond I never expected to form with another being. Let alone one as crude and conniving as the man stood beside me.

"I still can't believe you got invited back," I comment, matching my pace with his as we set off down the hill and towards the SMP. The sun sits high behind us, warming our backs as we walk.

"What can I say? I'm a popular man. Everyone wants a piece of me."

"Except when they want you in pieces." I quip cheerily.

"Eh, ya win some you lose some." He adjusts his suit jacket, uncaring of the opinions of the many who want him dead. "How do I look? My tie on straight?"

"Yes, sir."

"And my hair?"

"Still there."

"Good. Good. Appearance is important, no matter what people tell you. It's the first thing they judge you on." Schlatt explains idly, fixing a white cuff. "You can intimidate someone with looks alone, didn't you know?"

"Is that why you always make me stand menacingly behind you whenever we meet someone?" I question with a tilt of my head, all memories of our past encounters with strangers suddenly making a lot more sense.

He flashes me a pointed grin, "Ayy, now you're gettin' it."

"But will I need to do that here? Don't you already know these people?"

"Oh, you mean the L'Manburg boys? Nah, they're all pussys. Your intimidation is wasted on them. No, I brought you along for one man in particular."

"Oh?" I gaze at Schlatt, genuinely curious. For him to have a specific target in mind is unusual. Usually, he's unbiased in who he chooses to bully. I wonder who this man is?

We crest another hill and two figures come into view. The taller of the two, a blonde boy with a wild grin spots us almost immediately, and starts waving his arms around, cheering. The other, a brown-haired boy of much shorter stature, gives a cheery smile and folds his hands behind his back. They both wear matching uniforms of blue blazers and breeches, and sport black tricorn hats.

"Ayyyy! Big Man! Welcome back!" The blonde exclaims excitedly, rushing up to pat Schlatt on the back. I watch in astonishment of this friendly encounter. Schlatt rarely leaves a good impression on those he's met before.

"Tommyyyy! How've you been?" Schlatt grins. "And Tubbo! You're looking well."

"Hello, Schlatt," the other boy greets politely.