Balance - Tss Au

I hate you for what you did to me and I miss you like a little kid

Tw: Psych ward, eating disorder (ana, minor BED), purging (Note: The depiction of the psych ward is probs not 100% realistic)

i think the song 'Dynasty' by Rina Sawayama fits Remy well, just saying.

"Do you have a prior history of self harm?" The nurse asked.

"No" Remy answered in a monotone tone.

"Substance abuse?" Her hand was still tightly holding onto their arm.

"No"

"Suicide attempts or suicidal thoughts?"

"No"

She guided them into a small room, not bigger than a cleaning closet. Remy was wondering what Remus was going to tell Janus once he got home. Maybe Jan would be happy the burden that was his partner was gone.

The lady said she had to body check them for sharp objects and requested that they take their leather jacket off. It left them in their sport top, shorts and boots.

She pointed at the spikes on the jacket "I'll have to confiscate this until you're allowed to leave. Your phone too. And you're top if it has a wire in it"

Remy crossed their arms in front of their chest as if they thought the lady would tear off their top if they said no "It helps with my dysphoria" Was all they could get out as a meek answer.

"It's still a safety regulation" She took out a bland blue t-shirt from box "You can wear this for now. Ask any staffmember and they can lend you a phone so you can ask somene to bring your things"

They bit their lip out of nervosity as they took their top of and dragged the shirt on. It was so big it hid more of their legs than their shorts did. The lady moved up behind them and told them she was going to body check them now.

Her hands quickly moved across their chest and ribs. Her hands moved down to their hips and suddenly Remy was 13 years old again and all their instincts were screaming at them.

They didn't move, they didn't say anything. Fighting back never did any good. They simply bit their lipped harder, until blood was dripping down their chin. They stared forward and emptied their mind until their brain was 5 steps behind their body.

Remy watched on as the body check ended. As the lady took out the second packet of diet pills from their short's pocket. As she wiped away the blood. She grabbed their arm and led them back out of the hallway while talking. They didn't hear a single word.

The nurse stopped outside their room and opened the door for them before walking away. Remy was still dissociating as they sneaked into the room and sat down on the bed. The lamp above the other bed suddenly turned on.

"Remy?" Logan yawned out. He fumbled after his glasses so he could see that it definetly was them "W-what are you-u doing here? Visting hours are-e over. Did you br-reak in?"

"Go back to sleep babe. I'll like tell you tomorrow" At least there was one good thing with this place. Logan.

Soon snores came from Logan's bed. Remy laid down on their bed. It was cold and uncomfortable. They held the pillow close to their chest. They wished it was Janus they were hugging instead.

They didn't get any sleep that night. All they got were tears.

--

Roman lit the second candle in the form of a pumpkin and put it on the table. He'd made the dinner table as nice looking as possible, with a red cloth on it and everything. He'd put some romantic music on in the background and the food he'd spent time making was laying on the plates.