Calm [H.S]

Chapter 27: Then Let's Go

Surprise double update!! Make sure you read chapter 26 before this! Happy reading, kissies :) Side note, I low-key sobbed writing this.

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I hear the door behind me whip open through my crying, I assume it was Harry. He doesn't say anything or run over to me. I do feel him get closer to me, enough to see what I'm doing. I hear him sniffle which tells me he's still crying.

He stays there as I finish my drawing.. I put my pencils and drawing down on the table in front of me and put my head in my hands, crying even harder at this point. I feel the couch move next to me. I pick my head up out of my hands as he takes the drawing through the table.

"Is this-?" he starts but I cut him off.

"The drawing? Yes, just broken now." 

He begins to cry even more and so do I. We look at each other and all I can think about is how pathetic this must look from the outside.

"I'm sorry," he chokes.

"I know," I nod.

I grab the back of his neck and pull him to me. He places his head on my shoulder and his arms around my lower back. I run my hands through his hair as we both just cry for similar reasons maybe.

 A lot has happened in the past couple of months that has been hard to even think about. It's like once Kenna died I paid no attention to anything else. Like I never had a chance to even think about him, not that I wanted to. After we broke up, the world just kept spinning, especially for him. In movies, after break ups it seems as if almost time stops. But it didn't with us. Harry was still expected to be the Harry Styles that everyone is used to seeing even if he was broken and I didn't even have time to process it all, my emotions felt like they were completely shut off.

"I'm sorry," I mumble into the side of his head.

"About what?" he questions, moving his head from my shoulder to meet his eyes with mine. I move to sit on the table across from him, like he always does. He moves forward to be closer to me.

"I'm sorry for everything. For breaking up with you even though I know we could have worked it out," I start to tear up again, two falling down my cheek. Tears streamed down his as well. "I'm sorry for not answering your phone calls because I know you just wanted to talk to me and the funny thing is all I wanted to do was talk to you because you're the only person I could ever really talk to but I was stubborn and thought I would only hurt myself more if I talked to you. But the truth is I just wanted you to tell me that everything was going to be okay. I really, really missed you so much so I practically isolated myself. I would still talk to Olive but barley. I just- umm-" I get cut off when his lips meet mine. It feels natural. My hand meets his cheek as he grabs my hips and pulls me onto his lap so I'm straddling him. After a few minutes we eventually we stop and I rest my forehead on his.

"What does this mean?" I mumble, picking up my head to look at him.

"It doesn't have to mean anything right now," he says and I nod.

"Okay," I say as he looks at my neck.

"Since when have you worn a necklace?" he questions and I reach and pull it out from under my shirt. His eyes meet my necklace which has the promise ring on it. "I had figured you'd taken that off." I shake my head.

"I couldn't. Your other ring is at my apartment. I put it in a box with some other stuff, pictures, but I couldn't part with this one so I put in on a chain and I wear it like that," I say and he looks shocked honestly. He takes the necklace out of my hands to look at him and he smiles. "I felt that if I took it off it would be me completely giving up and I wasn't ready for that yet and I'm still not now."

His eyes meet mine again and I'm trying to figure out what is going to come out of his mouth but I can't.

"Thank you," he says.

"For?" I question.

"Not giving up yet, because I sure haven't. And for opening up to me. I know how bad it must have made you feel with me pushing you to just admit that you weren't okay but I hope that you also understand that it needed to happen. I do apologize for overstepping," he says and I shake my head.

"No, thank you for overstepping, as horrible as I may feel right now maybe I can just actually let the grief run its course and be done with it. I never let myself be upset about any of it. And everything happened within the span of two days so I had no time to even properly feel. But now I can," I explain and he nods taking in what I said.

"I can help you through it too, if you would like," he says. "Like you can talk to me, always know you can."

"Yes of course and you can do the same because I know we both probably have things to talk about. But we have time because you know that I'm spending Christmas with you right, friend?" He giggles.

"Oh shut up," he says. "Christmas is the day after tomorrow, I think you should stay longer than that. I mean you don't have to but I just figured it would give us more time to either figure things out or give ourselves some sort of closure." He can make things go from funny to serious within two seconds. 

"How long do you want me to stay?" I ask.

"As long as you want," he replies and I nod. "Want to go for a drive and just like blast music and forget about everything for a minute?"

"Yes, that would be great," I reply and he laughs, throwing me onto the couch.

"Then let's go."

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Umm sorry it was a short one but WE ARE MAKING PROGRESS!! I wonder what will happen next...ily all kissies