Chapter 35

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*H E R O*

"Thanks for driving," Lizzie says.

"No problem mama," I smile at her.

"Are you okay?"

"Sure. Bit hung over but sure."

I keep my eyes on the road so she doesn't see my face.

"Oh, you don't fool me, Hero! I know you wanted to share the car with Charlotte."

I sigh. I don't want to burden her but it would be pretty great to talk to someone.

"Yeah, I did. I don't know Liz. I really thought that once I told her the truth we would be back together. I didn't count on her to react like this. I don't know what to do."

Lizzie puts her hand on my leg and squeezes.

"You'll be all right, Hero."

"I just want things to go back to normal."

Now it's Lizzie's turn to sigh.

"The best things in life require some work, you know."

"Ha, look at you, preparing for motherhood."

We both laugh.

"Seriously though," Lizzie says.

"I know," I sigh. "But she seems so... detached. It genuinely seems like she has moved on."

Lizzie thinks about that for a second while stroking her belly.

"I see what you mean," she says after a while. "But you have to realize in what shape she was in, Hero. Maybe she's just trying to protect herself."

I frown at her. She's lost me.

"Look, I have never told you this because you were already suffering but when Charlotte visited us she was a mess. A total mess. She had lost so much weight, the sparkle in her eyes was gone, hell even her hair was dull. And the look in those eyes. She was like a ghost. It was like Charlotte had left us and all that was left was her body. She was really suffering, Hero. You really hurt her. And I was so scared. I was so scared that we might never get her back."

Lizzie pauses for a second and I swallow the lump in my throat. Not the image I wanted to picture. I knew it was bad but I never let myself think about just how bad it was. I figured since she had dated Josh that moving on would be easy.

"You okay?" Lizzie whispers.

"What's your point?"

"My point is that I was surprised when I saw her yesterday. She seemed so much like her old self again. She looks healthy and happy, the sparkle is back. Sure, it's clear that she has guarded her heart now but still, I'm happy to see my girl back. It seems like she's finally found her peace. Madeira must be a magical place. So I understand why she doesn't want to get back together. Surely she doesn't want to jeopardize her happiness."

"Heey, I thought you were on my side!" I protest.

"I am on no one's side," Lizzie says with a disapproving voice. "It's not a competition."

"But you helped me find her!"

"I was going to get married any way," Lizzie says. "But yeah, I love seeing you together. So yeah, I helped you but now.. seeing her so happy. I don't know, Hero. Maybe you should let her go. She deserves to be happy. Or maybe she just needs time. Whatever the case, you have to do this her way."

"I know," I sigh. "I will be whatever she needs. A boyfriend. A friend."

As much as I don't want to hear this, I know.

"I am really proud of you, you know," Lizzie says after a short silence.

"Gee, thanks," I say in a sarcastic tone.

"No seriously. I'm very proud of the way you're handling this. Remember last year when you had broken up? First you acted like a dick again, then you started drinking and oh all those girls! And after you were a complete mess. Now, you're handling this with grace. Last thing Charlotte needs right now is a guilt trip from you and you're respecting that. Doesn't matter how much you want to be with her and doesn't matter how bad you feel, you respect her wishes and you're putting her first."

I look at Lizzie and I can't help but smile at her because she's looking at me in such a loving way. She's right, I am doing the right thing. I am being chivalrous.

But doing the right thing sucks. And chivalry is overrated. 

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