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Chapter 36

*C H A R L O T T E*

Now that I'm calm enough I can enjoy the ride. The countryside is so beautiful here and because there is a whiff of spring in the air, I open the window a bit. Nature is just coming to life after a long winter and the air smells sweet and promising. I love the wind in my hair and close my eyes for a second. I can do this. I can spend some time here, with Hero and not break down. Or have sex with him again. My life in Madeira has made me so much stronger and I will resist heartbreak and temptation.

When we enter Cardiff, I look outside. I take it all in. It's good to be back. The city has changed but feels familiar at the same time. Jack and Lizzie's new place is on the other side of the city, outside the city center so while driving through Cardiff I get to see some of my favorite places. I see Cardiff Castle and Bute Park. I see a tiny bit of the Hayes and of course we drive past Liberty Bridge and the Atrium. I try to spot my old bedroom window but I fail. I will try to walk past it tomorrow. Last time I was here I was in a bad place and Cardiff felt a bit foreign but now it feels warm and welcome and like home again. I'm glad about that. That's probably what I hated the most about the whole situation. I felt so lost everywhere, even in places that felt like home before. And wherever I am, I will always remember my year in Cardiff as the best year of my life.

"Home sweet home," Jack says and he parks in front of a house.

"God, this looks great! There even is a park across the street!"

"Thanks! We were very lucky to have found this. There is a great school nearby as well!"

Lizzie is a bit tired so she goes inside immediately but Jack takes his time to show us the neighborhood. He's obviously very proud. The park across the street has a small playground where the twins can play. The park isn't very big but it has trees, grass, loads of flowers. It will be a great place for the kids to play! It seems like there are a lot of young families living in this street so I imagine they will grow up with a lot of friends. I can imagine the park as the heart of the community. There are some local shops close to the house and it really feels like a small community within the city. I am so happy for them. It can't be easy to get pregnant at such a young age and to have to drop out of university but somehow they made it work and now everything has worked out for them.

"Wow, Jack, this is amazing!" I say for the millionth time.

"Congrats man," Hero says. "This is great!"

"Thanks," Jack says with a broad smile. "We're very happy as well."

We walk back to the house.

The cars are still full of stuff so Hero, Jack and I bring all the gifts and bags inside while Lizzie makes us some coffee and tea. Again, she really wants to help us but we tell her not to.

"Go and make yourself useful by making us some coffee," I say.

She glares at me but eventually she goes back inside.

It takes us a while to get everything inside but I don't mind. It gives us something to do. I'm still not sure how to act around Hero and inside the house I won't be able to avoid him. Every time I look at him my heart pounds in my chest and the blood rushes to my cheeks. One would think that I would be used to his looks by now but I'm totally not. He's still as handsome and sexy as the first time I saw him and that doesn't help the situation at all. I'm trying so hard to forget him and here he is, looking more gorgeous than ever. His hair is a bit longer than the last time I saw him and I want to run my fingers through it all the time. So yeah, I'm having a hard time trying not to stare at him.

When we're done the living room is full of stuff. We try to walk to the sofa between boxes. When I sit down the hangover kicks in. I need to take a nap!

"Okay, so", Lizzie says when we sit down for coffee. "There is one slight problem."

I frown and look back and forth between Jack and Lizzie.

"We have two extra bedrooms," she continues. "But I was really hoping to get one of them ready for the twins."

"Yeah, sure! I can't wait to decorate it!"

Obviously it takes me a second to see the problem. But then it dawns on me.

"Oooh.." I say.

(This is the last one for 2020.. hope you enjoyed it! See you all in 2021 😘 I promise to update soon! Stay safe & healthy & have fun tonight! V. ❤️)