memories | yuzuru hanyu ff (on hold)

Chapter 7

Our food came. We said our blessings as usual and dug in. As I was eating, I felt a pair of eyes directed towards me. I looked up and scanned the place thinking it was maybe a child but then I stopped at the familiar pair. It's him. He had a bored look on his face, observing my features and I knew it. I grabbed a tissue and wiped my mouth, hoping that he wouldn't notice it was me. I tried focusing on my food, ignoring him, but his burning gaze was still on me.

'Shit.'

I stood up from my seat and told my mom I'm going to the restroom because I ate too much. She nodded, and asked the waiter for the bill.

I asked the other waiter where the restroom was and pointed it for me to follow. I went to a stall and locked the door. I sat at the toilet seat and took a deep breath. I'm not having a panic attack but more like I'm mentally preparing myself for what's coming. I don't want to see him, yet I want to just jump to his arms and engulf him with a big hug. I want him, but I shouldn't. My mental health was damaged a lot, and I can't afford to break it again. I took one last deep breath and went out of the stall. I washed my face just so I can relax my nerves with the cool water. I wiped my face with a tissue and left the restroom.

As soon as I went out, I was pushed against the wall, with a pair of hands next to my head. I looked up to see who it was, of course, getting ready to use my self-defense if this person does anything funny. I got ready to knee him in the groin until I realized it was the person I've been dreading to see.

He's face was so close to mine that I could feel his breath on my face. His eyes looking directly at my eyes. We stayed silent in that position and I couldn't help but look away from him.

"Natsuna, it really is you." He finally breathed out.

I snapped my head towards him, forgetting how close we were and accidentally hitting his nose with my forehead. We both winced in pain, as he took his hands off to cover his nose while I rubbed my forehead to ease the pain. I took this chance to get out of the area and went to my mom. Luckily, my mom paid for the bill and was just waiting for me. We wore our shoes and I quickly left the restaurant, leaving my mom behind. She called me back to wait for her and of course not for getting to say our thanks.

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We got in the taxi and told the taxi driver our address.

Good thing for us, we watch a lot of english shows so our english is quite good.

'Still need some fixing though.'

We sat in silence until my mom broke it.

"Care to tell me what happened back at the restaurant?" She spoke in Japanese while I put my full attention on her.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe, finally exposing what happened in my first year.

"Do you know Yuzuru Hanyu?" I asked carefully.

"Yes. He was a student in our school, also a very big figure skater. He's quiet famous, don't you think?" She chuckled, while I keep my mouth shut, looking away.

She noticed this and stopped.

"What about him?" She asked.

"When you became principal, I started opening up more to people in my school. Therapy helped a lot, and since then I felt like I didn't need help anymore. I laughed, smiled, I felt happy. Then I met him, Yuzuru. He became my boyfriend." I stopped and looked at my mom.

She gave me sign to continue, and that it was fine.

"I met him and we started dating. He was such a nice guy, the nicest guy you could ever think of. He made me feel special. We were together for about a year, when I was in my second year, until..." I halted.

My mom took my hand into hers and caressed it while she looks at me. I took a deep breath, knowing that she'll listen.

"Until, he broke up with me. He broke up with me in front of my classmates, in front of our friends. They started laughing but stopped once they saw me walking away. The next day, they started saying sorry but I knew they were just like that because you, my mom, were the principal." I looked at her. She looked down, deep in thought.

"He avoided me, not wanting to look at me. He probably thought that I was a distraction and that I wasn't needed anymore. He then stopped coming to school anymore, and it made me wonder if I was such a nuisance to him that he didn't wanna go to school anymore. I was heartbroken, I fell into depression again and yeah... I think that's when it all went downhill" I said with a smile. I didn't dare look up, too embarrassed to say the least.

I felt a hand under my chin, making me look up.

"Natsuna, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't try harder, that I didn't care enough, that I only thought of myself while you were hurting. I promise, that here in Canada, I'll change. I'll change for you." She smiled while she caressed my cheeks.

I teared up a bit and gave her a big hug. We separated and just laughed. I laid back and just observed the busy streets of Toronto.