memories | yuzuru hanyu ff (on hold)

Chapter 10

I got out of my hiding spot and saw my mom looking at me weirdly.

"Why- What- How- What? You know what, never mind" She shook her head accepting the fact that her daughter has gone crazy.

She pushed her cart away from me as I looked around to check if the trio was there. I stood up to realize that they weren't in sight and went towards my cart. I quickly caught up to my mom who was avoiding me from embarrassment. I snickered and continued walking beside her.

"Did you get anything?" She looked at my cart.

It was empty.

She looked me up and down, and left me with a scowl on her face.

"Wait! I have pictures." I laughed at my mom's facial expression.

I showed her the picture of the bed frame and decided to get a loft one. It wasn't as cheap as the others but not that expensive either. I also showed her the mattress that I want and agreed that we'd get the same. We picked out a few more items such as dishes, cabinets, a fridge and more. We also got some necessities like toothpaste, shampoo and conditioner, those stuff. After we paid, we went to one of the employees and asked if we could arrange a date to set up the bed frames and deliver the heavy furniture. We decided that they'll do it on Thursday, the 21st of March. I put it on my calendar so we won't forget. We left with the things on our hands and got in a cab. As I sat down, I pulled out my earphone, plugged it in and started to listen to music. I slumped on my seat, feeling tired on the events that happened today.

'What a fiasco'

And went to slumber.

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I woke up to the feeling of my mom shaking me. I plugged out my earphones and put it inside my pocket together with my phone and wallet. We took our grocery bags out of the trunk and went inside our house. We placed them on the kitchen counter and chilled for the time being. After about a few minutes, my mother stood up and got her things.

"I'm going to submit my driving permit to the government so I can legally drive. You should also get your driving license too." She said while packing her things.

"But I'm 17? Don't I need to be around 18 or something?" I asked.

"In Japan, you need to be 18 but in Canada, 16 is the age. So do you wanna come?" She asked looking at me, ready to go.

I thought about it and decided I'll take a walk around the neighborhood.

"I'm good, I'll go walk around the neighborhood. I'll probably rent a bike in the park too while I'm at it." I said having plan inside my head.

She looked at me, deciding whether she can leave me by myself. She sighed and agreed to what I said.

"We'll meet at the café near the park, okay? I'll call you when I reach." She said looking at her watch.

I nodded and accompanied her to the door to send her off. I bowed to her and wish her to take care of herself. She left as soon as she rode the taxi and I shut the door. I plopped my self on the inflatable bed and scrolled through my social media page. As I was scrolling, a notification popped out, notifying me that someone asked for a friend request. I looked who it was and saw Nam's picture.

'This kid...'

I shook my head and scrolled through his page. He was a figure skater.

'No wonder he asked if I skated.'

I scrolled and scrolled to find one picture of Nam, Spanish dude, which I assume 'Javi' from the post, and Yuzuru. They look so close. It looked so honest until I looked at Yuzuru. It made me remember that me and Yuzuru had a past. I closed my phone, not accepting the friend request and left the house.

I couldn't bring myself to look at him, yet I want to. I feel like I'm an embarrassment, a disappointment to be called his girlfriend.

'I'm a disappointment.'

I started breathing heavily as soon as I got out of the house. I can't breathe. I looked everywhere to find no one on the streets, It was hot since it was in the middle of the day. I can't breathe. I needed to calm down, I need to find somewhere cool to calm myself. I can't breathe. I need to snap out of this. I can't breathe. I look at my wrist to find a hair tie, pulled it as far as I can and released the tension to slap my skin. I can't breathe. It didn't work and I started to panic even more. Scratching and hitting myself in the process, hoping it would snap me out of it. I can't breathe. I feel my consciousness slowly fading away, as I catch my breath. I can't breathe. I don't need help, I don't want help. I can't breathe.

'Shit'

Please, someone help me.

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I woke up. Everything was blurry that I had to blink my eyes quite a few times. I got up and realized that it was a big mistake, suddenly feeling sharp pain in my head and darkness surrounding in my eyes. I laid back down to ease the pain. I took an inhale with my nose and smelled the place. The bed smelled oddly familiar.

'I'm such a creep, what's wrong with me?'

As the pain subside, I opened my eyes slowly. I looked around and realized that I was in a room. Shelves filled with trophies and medals, a desk on the side of the room, surrounded by books. I saw a pooh tissue box on the desk and immediately knew this room's owner was the cause of my problems.

'Is the cause of my problems.'

I heard voices outside the room and immediately closed my eyes, pretending that I was still asleep. Footsteps was heard and then the door opened. I tried steadying my breaths, as I pretended to sleep.

"Is she still asleep?" I heard a familiar voice, probably Yumi-san.

"I'm getting worried, Yumi-san. I'm sorry for bothering you. She told me she'll be fine, but here she is, out cold, in bed. I'm such a bad mother." I heard her sob.

It made my heart hurt but I continued to stay still.

"Should we call a doctor? No, she just fainted. She probably just had her panic attacks. Yeah, that's it...right?" My mom asked Yumi-san, and started sobbing again.

"There, there, Ayaka-san." Yumi-san comforted my mom.

"I'll take her mom downstairs and make tea. Take care of her, Yuzuru-kun." Yumi-san said as she left the room with my sobbing mom.

'Yuzuru? Shit.'

I heard the door close and subconsciously clenched my fist. I heard shuffling around the room and it stopped. Then the bed shifted, making me realize that he was on the bed.

'Wait, is this his bed? No, no, no. Shit, why do I have such bad luck?'

I felt the bed move, as weight was put beside my head and felt a breath fan over my face. He stayed there for probably a minute, or what felt like a minute. I couldn't breathe, he was too close. I was getting sweaty until he shifted off the bed. I heard footsteps moving around the room. The door opened and closed right after.

I soon realized that he has left the room. I opened my eyes and sat up, stretching in the process as I was in an uncomfortable 'sleeping' position. I looked beside me and was horrified to see that he was standing next to me. He went near me as I scoot back, but with my bad fortune, my back hits the bed frame. He hopped on the bed and started getting closer. I looked away until the moving stopped.

"It's been a while, Natsuna-chan" He whispered to my ear.