DreamSMP one-shots ||

// Paranoia //

I'm rlly liking Ranboo's character atm so here's another os based on his recent lore streams !!

(3rd person pov)
!!!! TW/CW: Derealization/dissociation episode, paranoia, (unintentional) sh, blood
~

     Ranboo sat in the corner of the dark obsidian room, his legs pulled to his chest and his hands running through his hair, tugging slightly. The room was small, made to be a type of mini panic room; dug into the side of a mountain going underground, its only light source was a dimly lit torch on the wall.
     It was the day after the festival, when the Community House had been destroyed and Ranboo had been outed as a 'traitor' by Dream in front of everyone. L'Manburg was officially gone, having been blown up for the third and final time. He was alone and completely isolated, his house was gone, and he was sure everyone was officially against him.
     His mind was in shambles trying to recall everything that had happened in the past two days. One thing he remembered for sure was the hot feeling that consumed his entire body because of the embarrassment, and feeling everyone's eyes on him when Dream called him a traitor, holding an exact copy of Ranboo's precious book in his hands. He remembers standing in the ruins of the Community House, the shocked sounds of the people around him, and especially seeing Tubbo's expression when he heard the news. For once, he just wished he could forget it all.
     'You betrayed him. You betrayed your best friend and now he hates you. Everyone hates you. Everyone hates you.' A voice rang in his mind.
     "No. I- I didn't mean to. They- I.. I never meant to betray anyone." He whispered to himself.
     'This was all your own fault. You didn't pick a side, maybe you should've picked a side!'
     "I'm- I can't pick a side. I can't pick a side, they're all my friends how would I be able to choose a side?" He asked himself.
     'Dream said you blew up the Community House, I can't believe you blew it all up. How inconsiderate of you.'
     "No.. no.." He shook his head, disagreeing with this inner voice; his eyes shut tight, desperately trying to make them go away. "I.. I didn't do that, I wouldn't have done that.."
      'Would Dream really lie about something he cares so much about? You did it, it had to have been you.'
     "No I... I would never do that.."
     'Did you do it? Did you?'
     "I can't.. I don't... I can't remember..." He sat forward, picking up his diary and opening it up.
     "I.. I would've.. would've written it down.." He flipped through the pages frantically, some pages were even torn out.
     He tried to focus on the words on the pages, but they were becoming jumbled as they danced on the paper. He blinked, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands but it was no use. He felt as if he was floating, and his mind felt foggy. He couldn't tell how long he had been in the room, all he knew was that the opening of the room showed a dark, dark sky outside.
     "What..." He put the book down, looking at the palms of his shaky hands. He realized he couldn't feel them as he moved his fingers. "Why can't I...."
     'Nobody likes you now. You messed up, you really messed up.'
     "No.. no, I.. right here it says-" He flipped to the page that said "Friends" at the top of the page, but there was nothing else underneath it. The rest of the page was blank.
     "Oh... oh god..." He closed his eyes again and pulled his legs back up to his chest, burying his face in his knees. He dug the nails of his fingers into his palms to try and stay grounded, but it didn't seem to be working.
     'You're alone, all alone. Alone and a terrorist.'
     "Stop.." he whispered.
     'You're an idiot, Ranboo...'
     "I'm- I'm..."
     'Ranboo...'
     "Wh- stop..." he was reaching his limit, usually he could handle the voice in his head but today it was so.. distorted. He couldn't tell the difference between the voice in his head and his own, and now it was almost as if there was some other separate voice as well.. It was all too much, he just wanted it to stop.
     He didn't mean to hurt anyone. He just wished people would stop choosing countries over the people around them. Didn't they see that people are so much more important than places? Who cares if the Community House is gone, or L'Manburg is gone? Nobody is dead, shouldn't that count for something?
     "Please.. please just stop..." Ranboo whined. He was tired, so so tired of this.
     'Ranboo!'
     "STOP!" He lifted his head, opening his eyes quickly to see that he wasn't alone anymore.
     "Ranboo?" Phil. It was just Phil.
     "O-oh.. Phil? What are you doing here?" Ranboo blinked, trying to make sure he wasn't seeing things.
     Phil bent down to Ranboo's level, who looked like a complete and utter mess.
     "Mate... what's happened?" Phil asked. Ranboo hated eye contact, so he stared down at his knees.
     "I... I don't.. I don't really know."
     Suddenly his cheeks felt wet as he was slowly being brought back to his surroundings. He didn't know he had been crying, and suddenly felt embarrassed again. How did Phil know where he was anyway? Was Phil mad at him like everyone else?
     "You're bleeding, Ranboo." Phil said, concerned.
     He brought his hands up to look at them, and sure enough there was red liquid seeping from small fingernail-shaped openings in his palms. He didn't realize how sharp they were, he must not have felt it.
    "Oh.. I didn't... didn't mean to.. um.."
    "Here." Phil pulled out some cloth he had on him, carefully wrapping it around his hands. Phil started with his left hand as Ranboo spoke.
     "Do you.. hate me, Phil?" His voice was timid as he spoke, trying to process what was happening. "Are you.. you're real right?"
     "Yes, I'm real. I'm touching you, aren't I?" Phil asked with a small smile, beginning to wrap his right hand.
     Ranboo nodded, trying to reassure himself he wasn't crazy.
     "I was wondering what happened to you after.. you know... Eret said he saw you down here the other day, I figured I'd check up on you since Techno brought you up when we were speaking not too long ago." Phil said, finishing off wrapping Ranboo's sore hands.
     "He.. he talked about me?" Ranboo asked, confused.
     "Well, yeah. He said he talked to you after the war?" Phil asked. Ranboo still didn't look at him, afraid he'd freak out again.
     "Oh.. yeah he did." Ranboo suddenly remembered walking up to Techno, the pig-man looking at him with a soft expression. He asked Ranboo if he was alright, and Ranboo had responded with something like, "Same as always."
     "I was wondering since, you know, both of our places were in L'Manburg and L'Manburg's kindof... gone." Phil paused. "I was wondering if you needed a place to stay." He said.
     "Um.. I.. yeah, I suppose I do." Ranboo smiled, finally looking up at the man. His expression was kind, which felt very comforting to Ranboo after this whole ordeal.
     "Why don't you come stay with Techno and I?" Phil asked.
     Ranboo thought for a second. His house was blown up along with all his things, it didn't seem like he really had any other options. Besides, it seemed that Techno didn't hate him after all, so why not?
     "Okay." He said.
     "Great. Lets.." Phil stood up, looking around the dark, barren room. Above the sitting Ranboo was a sign on the wall that stated, "You are fine."
     "Lets get out of here, yeah?" Phil said, feeling a bit worried for Ranboo. He looked down, sticking a hand out for the boy to take.
     Phil helped the him up, and together they made their way out of the room. As they walked together in comfortable silence Ranboo thought to himself: maybe, just maybe, he wasn't really as alone and hated as he thought he was.
     And boy, was it relieving.