"ITUTULAK mo ba ulit ako palayo?" pag-uulit na tanong ni Kylo. "Kasi kung oo, sasabihin ko na lang na hindi para hindi mo ako palayuin."
Cailean smiled. "Hanggang ngayon, hindi ko alam kung bakit mahal mo ako, Kylo. Noon ko pa tinatanong sa 'yo 'yan, college pa lang tayo, bakit ako?"
"Kailangan ba may sagot doon, Cailean?" he asked while looking at her. "Hindi ba puwedeng hindi ko rin alam? Wala akong magawa, e. Ikaw, e. Ano'ng gagawin ko? Pipigilan ko?"
She wasn't able to say anything. Cai just stared at Kylo.
"Ikaw kasi, Cailean, ang hirap sa 'yo, gusto mo lahat, may explanation. Gusto mo lahat, magagawan mo ng theory," sabi nito. "And that kind of thinking ruined us both. Gusto mo palagi kang advanced sa lahat ng bagay. That's not how it works, babe. No."
Unconsciously, Cailean smiled hearing him say 'babe'. Alam niyang hindi nito sinasadya 'yon, dahil ang tono ng pananalita ni Kylo ngayon, katono noong panahong magkasama sila at nag-aaway.
He would call her by her first name, pero sa dulo, palaging may babe.
"For once, I hope you'll live in the moment, Cailean," anito sabay talikod at pumasok sa loob ng unit niya. Iniwanan siya nito sa balcony kaya tumalikod siya.
She was smiling, para siyang tanga na kinikilig and it had been forever since she felt this. Butterflies, pounding heart, and a genuine smile.
A part of her was thankful that this was actually happening. Sa loob ng anim na taon, naghintay rin siya ng pagkakataon, pero nang makita niya si Kylo sa kasal kahapon, gusto niyang tumakbo papalayo dahil wala siyang mukhang maiharap dito. Puro kahihiyan, puro pagsisisi, at puro sakit ang nararamdaman niya.
Walang ginawang masama sa kaniya si Kylo, alam niya iyon. Kylo was nice to her. He was there to support her, he was there to make sure she was happy, he was there to make her feel loved.
But she wasted all of those because of her stupid dreams.
Cailean was full of herself that she forgot everything about Kylo. In return, all the plans she made did not happen because she lost the person who truly believed in her.
Huminga nang malalim si Cailean habang iniisip lahat ng what ifs kung sakaling hindi sila nagkahiwalay ni Kylo. Ang nakakatawa, biglang pumasok sa isip niya na gusto nito, two years after graduation, magpapakasal na sila. He was already planning about the family, at na-overlook ni Cailean lahat ng iyon.
Totoo ang mga sinabi nito. She was planning just for herself na hindi niya nagawang isama si Kylo. She forgot about him while he was thinking about her.
Pumasok si Cailean sa loob ng condo niya at naabutan si Kylo na naghihiwa ng cabbage para sa Pancit Canton na iluluto nito, just like the old times. Naglabas din ito ng pipino.
"'Buti mayroon pa sa ref," aniya habang naglalakad papalapit sa sofa.
"Yeah, nakahanap naman ako," sagot nito nang hindi tumitingin sa kaniya. "Weak ka pa rin, cannot eat spicy without cucumbers."
Mahinang natawa si Cailean at naupo sa sofa. Panay na rin ang hikab niya dahil inaantok siya. It's past her bedtime, hindi naman niya magawang matulog dahil nandito pa si Kylo. Ayaw naman niya bigla maging bastos.
"By the way, nagpo-post ka pa?" tanong ni Kylo sa kaniya. "Hindi na muna ako nag-o-open ng Facebook. I just want some . . . privacy," anito nang hindi tumitingin sa kaniya.
"Ako rin, they're messaging me kung nagkabalikan na ba tayo. Like, halos lahat ng batchmates natin, mukhang interesado," natatawang sabi ni Cailean habang naghahanap ng mapapanood sa Netflix. "By the way, how's New Zealand?"
