Making the perfect whoufflé: one shots

Dear Doctor

*****A/N: this is set before The Doctor came back for Christmas so just keep that in mind. Also, this could possibly be triggering for some people due to the mentions of depression, self harm and suicide. CONSIDER THIS A TRIGGER WARNING. Please, if you are sensitive to that kind of stuff, just don't read this one shot. Thank you!******

Dear Doctor [whouffaldi]

Dear Doctor,

Why did you leave? I know why, but everything is so dull without you.

Come back,
Clara Oswald

All Clara did lately was cry and stare blankly at the walls around her as she felt her entire world crash around her because he left and she couldn't stop him.

Dear Doctor,

I know these letters are pointless and you won't come back, but I miss you so much. Please come back, for me?

Yours truly,
Clara Oswald

She began to look like a hollow form of her old self. The hurt inside her heart began to show on her physically. Most of the time, she didn't eat because without him, she didn't feel like it. It hurt too much to eat.

"Why don't you eat, dear?" Clara's gran asked during her aunts birthday party. "Trying to lose weight?"

"No, gran, I just can't. Sorry." Clara smiled weakly and continued to stir her mashed potatoes around her plate.

Dear Doctor,

I look in the mirror lately and I can see it. I can see the sadness. My cheeks are hollow and my ribs are starting to show. I can't eat, it just upsets my belly. I'm begging you to come back.

Love always,
Clara Oswald

After two months of sadness and depression and crying at two in the morning, she was done. Fed up with tears and sadness and being hollow. And she decided it was best to end it.

Dear Doctor,

I have always loved you, I hope you know that. I'm sorry, but without you my life is nothing. I waited so long and you never came back. I love you.

Goodbye,
Clara Oswald

The gun was pointed to her head and tears streamed down her now hollow cheekbones as she sat on the living room of her flat, legs crossed. The neighbours would hear the blow, but she didn't care. The Doctor was all she lived for, and he left.

Her fingers tightened on the trigger and she was ready. But then she heard it. The TARDIS. The Doctor suddenly ran into the room, fell to his knees and grabbed the gun from her hand. He threw the damn gun to the other side of the room and quickly embraced her. Clara sat there blankly, crying into his chest silently. "If this is another mirage, I'm gonna be very pissed." She said, now clutching the sides of his jacket for dear life. She wasn't letting him disappear this time.

The Doctor lightly chuckled and kissed the top of her head, "No, Clara. It's me." He let go of her for a moment--Clara was hesitant to let go of him--just to cup her face and look into her eyes. "Why would you do that? Clara, why?"

Clara sobbed lightly and managed out, "You left." She looked up into his icy blue eyes and felt like she was home again.

"Oh, my Clara. You are so unique in this universe, why would you ever destroy your uniqueness?" The Doctor whispered, not really to Clara but to himself. He embraced her again and she began to loudly sob into his chest. He smelt of the TARDIS: mechanical and clean. "My Clara, my Clara. I'm here now." He noticed how thin she was and tried not to hug her too hard, afraid she might break beneath him. Her clothes hung on her body limply and he could feel her shoulder bones as he hugged her.

Clara looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Promise you won't leave again."

"I promise." The Doctor said, smiling sadly at her. He noticed something on her arm. Scars. The Doctor took her left arm in his hands slowly and examined the scars. "Did you do this to yourself?" He looked at her.

Clara pursed her lips and wiped her face with her right hand before nodding. "I'm sorry."

He cupped her face again, only inches away from her face. "You shouldn't be sorry, I should. I left you and you felt..lost. I'm so sorry." The Doctor dipped his head to capture her lips with his, tears mingling with the taste of her lips. Clara's eyes closed softly as she brought up her hands and laid them on his shoulders.

Clara pulled away for a moment. "Please don't leave."

"I won't. I love you, my impossible girl." He spoke before kissing her once again quickly. "Promise you will never ever ever do this to yourself again." he said, pointing to her scarred arm.

Clara gulped and reached to grasp both his hands in hers. "I promise."

The Doctor smiled and embraced her again. "You know, I have some too."

Clara pulled away from the hug only to grasp his sleeve and tug at it, asking for permission to see his scars. He nodded and she rolled down his sleeves, revealing shiny, purple scars that looked like they used to be deep. "Why?"

"I lost people, Clara. And when you regenerate, sometimes the scars stay." The Doctor smiled sadly before taking her hands in his and kissing her slowly. "You saved me, sorta, I suppose. When I met you, I felt as if I had something to live for. You. So I stopped. I'm sorry I ever hurt you."

"Stop apologising, you fool. You saved me from killing myself. Consider us even." Clara wiped tears off her cheeks and collapsed into his chest, clutching the lapels of his jacket and breathing in his scent deeply. Oh, he was home. He smelt of old cologne, spice and something earthy. "I love you, Doctor." Clara whispered into his shirt.

"I love you, too." The Doctor whispered back before kissing the top of her head.