Battles In Life

45

Today I have my laser treatment and we have to go to the hospital. Lochie hasn't left my side. I know it's hurting him as well. obviously not as in physically but it's hurting us both mentally. It's not something I want anyone to know this just needs to stay between Lochie and I, it's personal but I may need to tell corey.
Laying in lochies arms, I can feel his eyes on me. I haven't lifted my head from his chest since I woke up. Brushing my hand up his side I raised my head looking at Lochie. He had a small smile on his face but I could see in his eyes how he is feeling. His eyes always show me how much he loves me just by the way he looks at me. Moving my hand up I rested it on the side of his face and Lochie leant in pressing his lips against mine parting just enough to Entwine our tongues. When he pulled away I opened my eyes giving him contact "I love you" I grinned "I love you". Lochie only held me tighter like he never wanted to let go.
"How are you feeling?" "Not as sore as yesterday" "still sore?" "Yeah a little bit. I'm going to go for a shower before we have to go" "I will join you" I nodded. Lochie kissed my forehead before both of us parted and got out of bed. Lochie has left a few of his clothes here for when he stays. He doesn't stay every night but I don't mind if he does.
Getting into the shower Lochie followed, instantly putting his arms around my waist from behind. "Are you ready for your last laser treatment session today" "I'm hoping it's the last for my arms anyway. But yes I am" "does it hurt?" "It's surely doesn't tickle but I'm used to it" "I will be there with you this time" "I know and I appreciate it, I didn't like going on my own last time" "I told you I'd come" "I know". Lochie planted a few light kisses on my neck and shoulder making me close my eyes enjoying his touch. "Are you alright dana?" "Yes I am" "good". Both of us getting clean, Lochie stepped out first grabbing both of us a towel. "thank you" "that's okay" "do you have a problem Lochie?" He grinned "no I'm fine" "okay" I gave him a knowing grin making him shake his head. I know I can't do anything until two weeks after my bleeding has stopped which could take one to two weeks. But it won't stop me from pleasing him. I would Right now but we have places to be.

"Hi dana, how are you today?" "I am well and you?" "Wonderful, hopefully today will be the last treatment for your arms" "I hope so too. This is my partner Lochie" "hi Lochie I'm Caleb" "nice to meet you" "come through let's get started" "okay".
"Lochie would you like to come in?" "Yes I will be with her" "that's fine". Walking into the treatment room, I took my jumper off and laid down on the bed.

Lochie

Watching dana get the laser treatment done, I'm sure it wouldn't be comfortable but she just laid there in silence. When Caleb was done he walked over to dana putting an ointment over her forearms then covered them with dressings. "How long does dana need to keep those dressings on?" "Until the ointment has soaked in which should only take a couple of hours" I nodded.
"Remember keep your arms out of sunlight for the next two weeks" "that won't be a problem" "okay dana, you are good to go" "thank you Caleb" "you are more than welcome. Will you still be coming back for your temple?" "Yes" "in three months?" "Yes please" "okay I will book that on for you".
Dana put her jumper on then we both walked out to the front desk.
"Here you go dana your next appointment details" "thanks have a good day Caleb" "you too, take care".

"How are you feeling dana?" "Like my skin is on fire" "is that normal?" "Yes it is" I didn't like her in pain this is definitely a shit twenty four hours. I'm still struggling with the fact that dana had a miscarriage. I am honestly surprised she didn't cancel her appointment but it might be taking her mind away from what happened yesterday, well until we get to the hospital.
"Are you hungry?" "No not right now. To be honest I couldn't stomach any food I want to know what the doctor has to say" so I was right. Taking a deep breath as we walked into the clinic dana held my hand just a little tighter.
"Hi have you got an appointment?" "Yes with doctor Samantha" "name?" "Dana blanche" "thanks take a seat, she won't be long" "okay".
Just as we sat down samantha came out.
"Hi dana, hi Lochie please follow me" both of us only nodding, I grabbed danas hand as we followed samantha into her private room.
"Please take a seat".
"Thank you for coming in how are you feeling dana?" "I'm okay still cramping but not as bad and the bleeding has slowed down a lot" "mentally?" "Umm I think I am just in shock at this stage, I I didn't even know I was pregnant" "okay would you like to speak to someone?" "No I have Lochie" I grinned.
"Do you mind if I do an examination?, there is a bathroom if you'd like to freshen up" "umm I have just had laser treatment I can't get under the water" "that is fine I just need to make sure your body has released the fetus" dana only nodded "can you take your bottoms off and lay on the bed?" "Yes I can" as dana walked towards the bed, the doctor closed the curtain to give dana some privacy. "When you are ready please let me know" "I will".

I'm not sure what the doctor was doing but I could hear dana let out a few pained noises. "Sorry dana" "it's okay" it's not bloody okay she has been through enough but I kept my mouth shut.
"Okay dana you can get dressed now" "thank you". The doctor came out from behind the curtains throwing her gloves in the bin then washed her hands.
After a couple of minutes dana came out fully dressed, taking the seat beside me.
"Are you okay?" Dana only nodded "okay dana it seems the fetus has come out and I'm sure it would've been when you had the first gush of blood" dana only nodded "there is not much I can do, I can only recommend you get some rest and if need be take some pain relief" "okay" "I'm sorry dana" "thankyou is there anything else?" "No, you can go" dana stood up and I followed suit "thank you doctor" "take care dana".

Walking out, I put my arm around her back and walked her to the car.
She was quiet but I didn't expect any different her mind is probably working over time. I just hope it doesn't cause an attack.
"Let's get home and I will make us both some food" "okay, thanks for today Lochie" "you don't need to thank me dana we are in this together" dana nodded.
Arriving back at the apartments, we headed straight into danas never letting go of her hand. I know it's not easy for her as it isn't for me but together we will get through it.
Pulling her towards me I wrapped her In a hug "if you need anything please tell me" "I just feel numb Lochie" "I know me too dana, me too".

Dana

Letting Lochie cook dinner I headed to the bedroom. I could see Lochies phone ring but I'm guessing if he wanted to talk he'd have his phone on him. Right now all we need is each other. I don't know what this means. is it a sign i should not be with Lochie or is it just another battle in life that I have to deal with. I just don't get it. Some times I wish my parents were back but they decided to continue to travel. They were going to come back for me but I want them to be happy to enjoy their life. They know Lochie is here for me and I think that has helped them knowing I have someone here. as much as I would like to discuss this with mom I can't, I know corey will probably question me about why I have taken a few weeks off from jiu jitsu and I'm not sure if I can say anything or if Lochie would want him to know, it's a very personal thing and he may feel guilty as I was at jiu jitsu just before it had happened but no one is to blame we didn't know.