Sinner | Draco Malfoy

21

Draco's pov —

' dark gloomy day, rain pouring from the sky, it signified the sadness that radiated from us today, everyone gathered around, friends, family, even strangers. all gathered together around the black casket, I tried to get closer, it was impossible, swarming of people flooded the place, tears pouring quickly down their faces, sobs escaping their mouths, chest heaving trying to catch their breath, I sat there, confused, who could have died?

as I got closer, pushing through the crowds, I was forced to wear all black, and hold a white rose in my hand, no words forming from anyone, loud sobs, a few whispers here and there, I managed to get to the casket, realization set in, and I understood the sobbing

pain struck through my beating heart, an aching pain that wouldn't go away, I wasn't a man for crying, but tears built up in my eyes, and poured down my face, there you were, laying in that casket, I was numb, words couldn't explain the way I was feeling, you were lifeless, and I was alive.

but you were dead because of your addiction, y/n, can't you see that you killed yourself, can't you see that you left me behind in this world, a world that I can't see without you? now I am a boy who lost his hope, and you were a girl who gained her wings. '
—

I gasped opening my eyes, frantically searching around the room, you were still here, laying beside me, your back pressed to my chest, and you were okay, soft breaths released from your lips every so often, a snore that released once in a great while, your lips parted, a bit of drool pouring from the side of your mouth.

'Thank Merlin," I whispered to myself, everyone has dreams I suppose, some have nice dreams, some have sad dreams, and here I am dreaming about her dying, quite a sad moment, don't you think? maybe I won't confess it to the world to bring it upon us.

I will never think of this dream again, it is simply not real correct? "what are you whispering?" she asked with a sleepy voice, i hummed in response, "oh maybe I was sleep talking." sleep talking? really draco, couldn't you have just said you had a bad dream?

"sorry, what time is it?" She questioned, and I glanced at the clock on the nightstand, "six in the morning," I replied, pulling her body closer to mine, not wanting to lose the warmth that radiated from her body, t'wasn't something I would admit to, but I liked this more than sex.

cuddling was more intimate than sex for me, you could simply enjoy the presence of another body pressed into yours, warm and cozy, no words, soft breathing and hearing one another's heartbeats, another thing I wouldn't admit.

do I like her? yes I do, can I admit that? absolutely not, how does one admit their feelings to a girl whom is destined for their life to be ruined by intoxication? "I should start to get ready," she mumbled, and I ignored her, bringing my face closer to the back of her neck, pressing a chaste kiss to the soft skin, "don't go," I replied, a slight whine hinted in my voice

"But I must, and so do you." she untangled her legs from mine, and turning her body to face me, our faces inches away and suddenly I felt the embarrassment of not brushing my teeth, did I have bad breath right now? oh Merlin, "why must we, darling?" I raised an eyebrow at the girl pressed to my body, "because we still have classes to attend to," she replied cockily.

"I say we ditch school, forever. leave far from this school, far away from these people," I sighed, yes it was a plan of mine for a while, but at this point in my life, that wasn't a reality, purely fantasy, "where would we go?" she was more awake now, she looked more beautiful when she was awoken, "somewhere with an ocean, or a river, or a private house with a field of dandelions in the backyard," I was beaming.

but of course could never truly happen, not because I didn't want to, or not because I didn't want to bring her with me, there was a certain task I must finish before moving on with my life, I could barely stay focused, barely focus on the studies that each professor handed me, it was overpowering, and I didn't wish to get anyone upset at me.

but I'd much rather be in a field of dandelions, enjoying the warm breeze, sipping on something cold, yes what a lovely fantasy. "That sounds lovely, I've always wished to live in a castle, with white and gold all over the place, but not the castle you are probably thinking of, a small castle perfect for a family of four." She smiled, her fingers tracing my hip bone, furthest I would allow her to lift my shirt.

"Family of four? you want children?" I've never thought of children, possibly wouldn't mind it, but also a possibility that I might mind it. "Of course I do, don't you?" her accent was a lot more prominent and stronger when she spoke about things she enjoyed, "I've never thought about it like that, skipping that question." I laughed nervously, "Berlin or Rio de Janeiro?" I asked her again, "Berlin, without a doubt." She replied confidently, and it was a nice conversation, she hasn't asked for drugs.

that's a start yeah? the night was wonderful, we've gotten intimate with one another, showered together, enjoyed each other's company, but happiness doesn't last for too long, and I must leave her again, and let coldness enter into my body, and protect her from far away.

Because life isn't fair, and the more you try it only becomes harder,

every beginning always gets an ending.

happy or sad,

We must accept our fate.

// hello this isn't my best but I needed to update something for you guys,, Decided on something different! :) hope you enjoy, also don't forget to vote and comment I love seeing everyone's comments :))

Also there will be no pregnancy in this book