Historia. | Kuroo Tetsuro

44

slight trigger warnings: panic attacks, and mention of self-harm.

I fought with (Y/n), and I don't like it. She scared me. She yelled, slapped me, and cursed me. She was never like this. She bursted like a balloon that popped from being excessively pumped. I didn't like it. I didn't want to make her cry. But this....

♥︎: I don't love you anymore.. Let's break up.

I told her we will talk once I get home. I even considered calling once I land! I don't want to break up with her! I've been trying to fix us this past two years... I don't want us to end like this... Please.. I don't want to break up with her. She's the only one.. I don't want anyone else. I don't want to part with her.. I'm not wasting 9 years... I love her. Why is this happening?

I've tried calling, but she wouldn't pick up. I also tried sending texts, but she wouldn't answer or reply. I tried to call again, and I realized.. she blocked my number. I've been trying since last night, but she wouldn't pick up. Not her, nor her assistant, nor her manager... nor Misaki.. no one. No one is telling me why this is happening..

Is she really breaking up with me? After all those years? After we've already been engaged..? Speaking of... she never wore her ring in the past two years. Has she been planning on breaking up with me ever since? So.. was yesterday... was it when she planned on breaking up with me? She doesn't love me anymore? Since.. when..?

"Kuroo-senpai." I turn to the voice, and find Kokoro. "Why.. what's with the waterfalls? You've been letting your river flow since last night."

"She broke up with me..." I'm not agreeing to this. "Look... she broke up with me.." I laugh, and show her my phone. "In the end.... I'm still trash.. I said I was going to marry her..... I want her to be my wife.."

"Who breaks up through text messages these days?" I glare at her, and she sighs. "Please stop crying. Coach is looking for you—Iwaizumi-san is." I nod, and stare at my phone screen. "Kuroo-senpai."

"I don't want to break up with her... I have so many things... left unsaid..." I love her. I love her so much.. I don't want to let go.

"Kuroo-senpai." I push her out of my room, and lock the door. "We have a meeting in 20 minutes!! Jeez."

I drop to the floor, and stare at my phone. Why can I not keep you out of my head? (Y/n)... have you any idea how much I longed for you to come home? How much I wanted to hold you like that again? How much.... I wanted to drop this just to be with you? But... I had to provide for you, so I couldn't let myself get fired. I have to save money for you.. for us. But now.. you broke up with me.

Your ring.. did you know your name was engraved on that? It's small so you wouldn't notice... you've been looking less. I know. I felt it.. I felt how you slowly drifted away. How you slowly fell out of love.. but, despite that, I still felt that you had a part of you that loved me. You're not the type to take advantage of people.. You wouldn't have let me hold you tight.. if you had completely fallen out of love.

But I... never once looked at you? I felt.. ridiculed.

When you had told me that I was looking at you, you have no clue on how happy I was to hear such things. I wanted to be with you, no matter long I would've had to court you. If it took me years, then I would've been okay. But, you said that.. and I believed you. But, you tell me... I have never.. not once... ever looked at you? Never..? You lied to me..?

Though you have, more than that I felt the fear of losing you. I didn't like it. You're the one I swore to marry. I don't break... such promises. Especially not that. I proposed, and at first you declined and ran away, and then you said yes. I felt happy, but when I saw your face, you were full of doubt. I let it go because I thought you were only scared because we were going to a different stage. But... no.. You have been questioning your love for me.