Historia. | Kuroo Tetsuro

52

slight trigger warnings: mention of suicide, rape, and self-harm

"Is that all your luggage?" I ask, and she gives me a sad smile.

"I told you, I could handle everything on my own. You didn't have to bring a person you hate to the airport." Me.. hate you? I don't know... I'm mad.. but it's not that... "Tet—Kuroo-san..."

"Please.. anything but that... not right now..." She cups my cheek, and pecks my lips. I grip onto her coat, and pull her closer. "If I never loved you... do you think I would ever let you do this..?"

"I'm your toy, Tetsuro.. Your stand-in doll for your desires and for your fears." You're not a toy.. "I'll be off now. Take care of yourself." She gave me a long kiss on my forehead before heading inside.

I drive back home, and find her parents in the living room. I take my shoes off, and wear my indoor slippers. I greet them with a bow, and head to the kitchen to get refreshments. Her Mom likes tea, and her Dad prefers coffee. Maybe that's why she likes both. (Y/n).. I'd like to say she's cute and I love her so much.. but I don't know.

I place the tray on the table, and hear a recording of our argument from yesterday. I grab a hold of my hand as I felt it shaking from nervousness, shame, and guilt. Her parents know how much I cursed her. I'm a jerk. Now, I don't think I ever have a chance with (Y/n). They will never let me marry her... not with this in hand.

Her Mon stands from the couch, and my eyes widen as I felt taken aback from the sight of anger on her face, tears streaming endlessly. She slapped me on the cheek, and I felt lost. Why was I slapped? Was it because I cursed their daughter? Because I got mad at her?

"That's.... for raising your voice without knowing her reason..." She slaps me again, and I feel the numbness of my cheeks. "That's for raping her... back when she was 18." I see her raising her hand, and I instinctively shut my eyes to prepare myself for the impact.. but, nothing came.

She instead cupped my cheeks and looked at me with grief, crying hard and even dragging me with her to the floor as she fell on her knees. She caresses both my cheeks gently with her thumbs as she rested her forehead on mine, crying and saying absolutely nothing. She pulls me into a hug, and like a force from nowhere, I felt tears flow from my eyes.

"Please... trust my daughter...... she doesn't want this either.. but she wants to marry you... This is the only way.." How could leaving me be a way of showing me that she wants to marry me..? "(Y/n) said she'll get better.. so wait for her.. No matter how long it takes.. Please.."

"She left..... doesn't that mean... she's cutting off our engagement..? She doesn't want me.."

"Tetsuro," her Dad kneels in front of me and smiles, "(Y/n) doesn't want anything else but for you to get better for your relationship to go well. Okay?" He pat my head, and I don't know. I hugged her mother tight.

"It hurts, doesn't it Tetsu-kun? It hurts to see the one you care for... leave and just go as if it's nothing... But to (Y/n), this isn't nothing... this is everything to her... Take a leap of faith, and trust her.. please...."

"(Y/n)... doesn't want me..... (L/n)-san... She doesn't want me at all..." She shakes her head, and pulls away from the hug. She wipes my cheeks, and plants a soft kiss on my forehead. "I.... don't even know if I love her..."

I've spent my days wondering if (Y/n) was right. She said that I only see my mother in her. It's disturbing to think so. I've had... sexual intercourse with her and we have done things that only couples do. How could I see my mother in my fiancée when I've done such indecent things? (Y/n) is wrong in so many ways! She's my fiancée.... how could she say that..?