Historia. | Kuroo Tetsuro

12

Kuroo-san—Kuroo brought me to the hill again to calm down. It's pretty late already, but, I kind of don't want to go home yet. The sudden news of Misaki running away from home... I can't help but think that it's my fault. Maybe if she hadn't seen my cuts.. or..

"(Y/n)," he calls out and I hum in response, "care to share your thoughts with me?" He takes a seat beside me and places the jacket around my shoulders.

I turn to him and ask, "May I?" He nods and I rest my head on his shoulder. "I still think that I'm the reason why she left... I am the reason why she's like that in the first place.. it's my fault." Sharing my thoughts made me shed a few tears, I've been trying to hold back since we got here.

He wrapped an arm around my shoulder, carefully rubbing my arm as I cried. "It's not your fault, it was a misunderstanding, right?" He kisses the top of my head and wipes my cheek. "Someone sabotaged your friendship, so don't say that it was your fault."

"But Kuroo..." I back away, tears falling continuously at the thought of Misaki. Where are you? "She.. because of me, she had a panic attack... she.. she.." He cupped my cheeks and wiped them with his thumb, giving me a kiss on the forehead. "It's because of me..."

"It's not your fault, okay? Look at me." I reluctantly look at him, earning a kiss on the tip of my nose. "It's not your fault." I nod and a smile forms on his face. "That's my girl. Now.. let's head home, shall we?" I nod again, and he takes my hand to pull me up. He tried to pull his hand away but I held it tight.

"Don't.. let go.." I'm scared. "Please..." He nods and takes my bag, carrying it as we headed home.

I keep thinking that Misaki left because of me. She might've thought that, why did I have to come back? Why am I here? I never knew she came to the same school... if I had known, then I wouldn't be here. I would've avoided her to keep her from getting worse because of me. She might suffer.. because of me.

Kuroo had to check on my face before letting me in the house. He told me that Nana would be worried at me if she sees my face. He wiped my cheeks, making sure that there were no traces of tears. My nose and my eyes are probably puffy, the traces of the tears aren't really important. I feel so cared for...... just my imagination.

We got home and the lights were already off, and Nana and Tenji-san are asleep. Kuroo-san asked me if I wanted to take a shower and I just shook my head. I'm tired.. I don't want to go to the bathroom, I might result to hurting myself again. Especially that, I'll be in a closed space. I might hurt myself and worry him—why does that matter?

Reminds me.. he was going to say something. "Kuroo....." I call out, and he hums. "You said that you were going to say something... what was it?" He turns to me, his eyes looking anywhere but me. "Kuroo..?"

"I-I don't think that it's a good time to say it." He answers, turning his back against me. "I'll tell you.. once things are okay." He takes his shirt off and heads out of the room.

What could it be? Maybe it's something about Misaki? That's why it's a bad time to say it because she's not around? Is that it? I hope it's nothing too serious.. if something's off about Misaki then I'm going to blame myself until I die. I can't stop thinking about how I ruined Misaki's life because of one stupid post... I don't want her to be stuck in this. If I'm going down, then I'll go down on my own. I won't drag her with me.

I lock the door to change my clothes, and unlock it once I finish. I wouldn't want to lock him out of his own room. I wonder where she is.. I don't have her number, I haven't asked for it yet... maybe I should've asked for it while I could, but would she have given her number to someone who ruined her life? She wouldn't, right? She hasn't even forgiven me yet, she hasn't told me that we're good already.. we're not yet there. I shouldn't fantasize that yet.. but I do wish we could be friends again.