Frozen Heart

Chapter 6 ~ "One Week"

Nik

Something felt off about the phone call I got from Grace a while ago. She seemed totally content to meet up just two hours before and suddenly she was coming down with a nasty virus? It just didn't add up.

I didn't have a clue what to do about Grace, I knew that I wanted her and for the first time in my life that want extended far beyond sex. I thought she was amazing, pretty. She gave me all these extra chances about stuff and seemed to be incredibly understanding. I actually could see myself spending time with her and I was looking forward to tonight being the start of it all.

I just wanted to keep her separate from everyone and everything else in my life. With her I could be a different person, I couldn't let everyone see me weak and caring. Only her, the only girl who made these last two weeks feel like sunshine.

I was trying to spend some time with Sasha today before dad dragged her off to the rink. She was exhausted. For most people, rounding the bend into Christmas was exciting. It was time off with family, delicious meals and presents. In our house it was Alex and I either hiding away in our rooms or doing anything possible to be out of the house. Sasha worked through the whole thing, never slacked off. 

It wasn't that much fun for any of us really. Especially not her with her extra practices. Dad always said a holiday wasn't an excuse to slack off. Sasha never slacked off, but she needed a break.

"What's wrong with you tonight?" Sasha asks and I raise my eyebrows. We were sitting in the family room, watching a movie that she liked. But of course all I've been thinking about is Grace. "Can you even tell me what happened in the last five minutes of the movie?"

"Sorry, I've just got a lot on my mind." I mumble, shaking my head. She sighs and pauses the movie, turning to look at me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asks and I shake my head.

"No, don't worry." I tell her and she rolls her eyes.

"You don't have to be so afraid of emotion, Nikita." She teases. "You know you could let me or somebody else in once in a while." 

"I know, Sash." I say with a shrug. "It's just hockey stuff, I'm alright." She nods and turns the movie back on, giving her attention back to the screen.

Was that why Grace canceled? Because I wasn't telling her anything really or expressing myself? If that was the case I'd feel disappointed, I knew I shut her out a lot the other night at dinner. She talked in depth about her parents, her life, and her feelings. I barely told her anything about me, but I thought she seemed more open then that.

I didn't think I'd lose her just like that so fast. I never let people in, I didn't want anyone inside of my head. But I knew she was already in there, that she was worth it to me. I had to do something, share something about me with her so I didn't lose her.

"Sasha, are you ready?" We hear in a firm voice behind us and Sasha pauses the movie, turning to dad behind the couch.

"Yes, but don't I have another twenty minutes?" She asks.

"Don't talk back." He says in a curt tone and I feel my hands form into fists. "I want to leave early, get there and have you stretched before the ice is cleared. I want you on your game today, do you understand?"

"Okay." She says, getting up off the couch. He turns and heads to the front door and I stand and grab her arm.

"Don't burn yourself out." I tell her and she nods. "Don't let him get in your head, you can do this." She smiles weakly and gives me a hug. "Good luck." I tell her, letting her go and get ready. I turn off the movie and go to the kitchen hearing dad pull out. I grab a granola bar and scroll through my phone to pass the time.