If she knew...

I couldn't lose you

Felicity’s POV

I woke up in the foundry with Oliver next to me he held me close as I was telling him what I saw, saw him die, against Ra’s. I don’t want to lose him not again. I leaned against his strong frame just comforting myself that it was Vertigo and not real.

“I was scared Oliver.” I say softly. “I couldn’t lose you, not again.” I say softly as he puts a hand on my cheek.

“You’re not going to lose me!” he says with the same sincerity he gave me the first time he said that. I lean into his hand as I wanted to feel his touch. My skin tingled under his touch. I could tell he felt it as he slowly moved his hand along my jaw and rested it on my chin.

“I don’t want to lose you I have lost you too many times already.” I say as realization hit. I couldn’t lose him I didn’t want to. I couldn’t bear it. If he were gone I would be totally lost.

He took my hand in his like he did the night he came back and placed it over his beating heart. “I’m not going anywhere I promise.” He says as he places a light kiss on my lips. I smile and I keep leaning my head against his strong shoulder.

"I hope you didn’t kill him. I hate being the reason for you killing. You killed the count before because…” he cut me off.

“Felicity… He’s in jail for life and we talked about the count before, he had you and he was going to hurt you. There was no choice to make.” He repeats the same thing he told me then.

I look up into his blue eyes and I see warmth, warmth only he could provide he wraps a protective arm around my shoulders protecting me form all the outside misery.

“Oliver there was something that I needed to tell you before the whole incident happened.” I say wanting to tell him what I wanted to tell him then.

“What is it?” he asks as he looks into my eyes, searching for something.

“The times I flat lined I was surrounded by cold and then there was a warmth I was craving and without realizing I let it take over. But your voice made me want to keep fighting. The thought of seeing you again made me want keep going, to keep fighting. I couldn’t let you go. I couldn’t live without you.” I say as I feel tears welling up and I felt a single tear find its way down my cheek and onto the cold floor. “While I was hallucinating I saw Sara too and she told me to keep fighting too. So I kept fighting, I did it for you and me. I couldn’t go, I just couldn’t let go…” I trail off.

“Felicity, I’m glad you didn’t let go" he says as he kisses my head. “I don’t think I could live without you.” He says slowly bringing his lips to mine, placing a soft kiss.

“There was something I wanted to ask you. Could you teach me to shoot an arrow?” I ask with a playful smile as he looks at me with a smirk.

“Yes!” he says “but first you heal fully, both with your scars and the vertigo incident.” He says kissing me softly. He ran his hand down my back, across the long scar, sending tingles up and down my spine. He than wraps a protective arm around me and we just stood like that, rocking back and forth for what seemed like hours.