𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝗲 [ 𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗮𝘂 ]

deserved .30

"and cut!" ivan yelled out, getting even more frustrated, "for the tenth time today.. " they were filming. it was the scene where "grace" spends the night at "aidans" house after the funeral. ricky and nini were supposed to be sweet and happy towards each other but the whole scene was a shit show. ricky couldn't get himself to look at nini in the eyes and nini couldn't ... well she couldn't really do anything right.

the girl groaned and ran her fingers through her hair, "i'm sorry," she muttered again. she glanced at ricky who had an impatient look on her face. nini couldn't focus. she had so many things on her mind and she just couldn't get herself to stop thinking about anything.

ivan went up to the two, "okay, ima say this one last time. eye contact. emotion. smile," he gritted through his teeth before he forced a smile at the two actors, "got it?"

"got it," ricky and nini both said at the same time before ivan walked away. they glanced at each other before ricky broke his eye contact again. he just felt weird around nini and was still upset about the way things ended. nini just felt like shit around everyone. ivan sat back down in his chair.

"action!"

nini stared at ricky while he eyed the table. the girl tried her best to ignore everything that was going on through her mind and focus on the scene as ricky said his lines, "i don't know, grace. how do you expect us to be friends when we barely know each other?"

"i didn't know you still wanted to be friends with me after everything that went down," nini muttered. the girl thought it was ironic how well this scene fit her and ricky's situation right now.

"..do you wanna be friends?" ricky asked, looking up at nini. it was hard for him to look at her. the boy knew that once his eyes were on her — they'd never want to leave.

"yeah.. i guess.." nini reluctantly said, ".. do you?"

"why is this so awkward?" ricky said and forced a laugh, "yeah nini. i really like you and i wanna be friends, ricky forced himself to say. nini tried her best to smile and cocked an eyebrow up at ricky. the boy frantically shook his head.

"i meant i really like you as a friend," the boy awkwardly said. nini nodded her head as the red rushed to both of their cheeks. she always messed up at this part.

"i really like you too ricky — i mean aidan. fuck," nini groaned. she heard everyone groan with annoyance and they put their heads down with disappointment. nini looked at ricky who just tried to look everywhere else but the girl. ivan groaned and yelled cut. he made his way to nini with an angry look on his face. shit, here we go, nini thought to herself.

"NINI! this is the eleventh time we're gonna have to reshoot this scene. what's up? why you acting like this," ivan snapped at the girl. she started to feel overwhelmed and shrugged her shoulders. ivan cocked an eyebrow at the girl, "you don't know?! you don't know why you messed up this scene ELEVEN times? no, there must be something bothering you if it's taking you this many times to say a simple line."

the girl glanced at her moms and benjamin who just gave her the same exact look as ivan. they were all angry. she looked to ricky who just sat in the chair and kept his head down while nini got scolded at. she let out a frustrated sigh, "i'm sorry—"

"i don't want to hear your apologies. i asked you a question so i want an answer," ivan said in a stern voice. nini let in deep breath as she felt herself start to tear up. there were so many answers but she just didn't know which answer was the right one.

"i'm just stressed. i-i don't ... ugh! i just can't think straight—"

"do you ever think straight?!" ivan asked. nini got taken aback. it reminded her of her conversation with lewis. ivan continued, "we're all stressed here, nini. but maybe if you did the damn scene right we wouldn't be."

"i know! i just .. i didn't — i'm s-sorry," nini started to twist her words and sentences together. ricky and ivan watched as nini's eyes started to feel up with tears but she still scrambled for the right words to say. ricky got up from his seat and stood at nini's side.

"nini .. it's okay," he tried to tell her but the girl just shook her head. ricky tried to reach for her but she just backed away. soon enough, benjamin and her moms rushed to nini's side.

"woah! what's going on?" benjamin asked as he stood next to nini. her breaths were starting to get shorter and shorter. she was struggling to breath.

"nini, stop," mama carol said in a stern voice as she got close to nini, "cut this act out right now."

"she's not acting!" ricky yelled and motioned for everyone to back away, "she's having a panic attack. can everyone just step back and give her space for a second??"

"nini, listen to my voice, alright" benjamin told her in a calm voice, "you're having a panic attack, okay? close your eyes and try to control you breathing—"

"oh my god, we do not have time for this shit," ivan groaned and rolled his eyes, "nini, cut the crap."

"ivan, i'm gonna need you to just leave right now, alright?" benjamin strictly told ivan.

nini's moms rolled their eyes and laughed, "oh come on, benjamin. it's all in her head."

"I SAID LEAVE," benjamin finally yelled out as he looked at everyone with anger. they all got taken aback and backed away from him and nini. benjamin took a deep breath and turned his focus on nini.

"come on, neens. let's control your breathing."

"i-i can't. they just .. i can't," nini tried to say but her breath was just becoming shorter the more she thought about everything. ej and maya. ricky and lewis. ivan. this movie. her moms. her music. lewis moving to california. benjamin and jenn being together. ricky hating her. nothing was right and it was all her fault. this is her fault. this is her punishment.

"NINI!" ricky yelled out as nini's eyes closed and she fell to the ground. she thought she deserved this.