Come Back Home To Me 7DS X Reader

Chapter 12: I Know I Made A Mistake

Y/N POV:

I walked slowly down the long, dark quarters of the castle, leading the way to the one piece of artwork that always brought me a slight bit of comfort. I kept my eyes on the navy blue carpet that trailed the long hallway, trying not to meet any of the eyes of the family portrait artwork that was hanging all along the gold painted wall.

Of all of the kingdoms to ransack, he had to pick Camelot. I huffed a small sigh, and looked at the one portrait I had looked at every day since coming back to the place that not so long ago used to feel like a home to me, sadly though, now it feels more like a prison.

Without even looking up, I knew I had reached the painting I was looking for. Ever since I had discovered it, among the family portraits, I had come to see it everyday while Zel was having business meetings, or whatever he did. I never cared enough to get the details, as I wanted no part in whatever evil scheme he was currently planning.

I delicately ran my hand over the cracked and splintered, dark wooden frame that held a portrait of Arthur, myself, Elizabeth, Hawk and the Sins, smiling softly at it. This particular portrait must have been painted after the battle with Hendrickson, but I was glad it was still on the portrait wall. I doubt Zel even knew it was here. I moved my hand slowly over all of the faces of everyone that the dried clumpy paint had created.

We were all in front of Liones castle. A smiling Diane in her Giant form, standing beside Gowther who was giving his signature peace sign. King was floating on his Chastiefol in its pillow form, with his head laying in his hands. Under his floating body, Meliodas had a blushing Elizabeth in a bridal hold, with his hand gripping her ass. Merlin's face was serious as always, while Arthur had his arm around her shoulders. Finally, my eyes landed on where Ban and I were in the painting.

He had his left arm around my waist, pulling me in close to his side, while his eyes had been painted to look at me in a loving way. Under his right arm, was a beaming Hawk. I was smiling in the portrait, one arm hugging Ban's waist, wearing a baby blue coloured dress.

I was walking around the castle for the 5th time today, because there is nothing else to do. It's been a month of me living here in Camelot with Zel, and although it may all seem perfect, my heart knows something isn't right. I'm miserable, it seems like my heart is only half of a whole.

I had chewed through my bottom lip multiple times, causing my onces pink lips to be covered in cracks, and scabs. My once toned and fit body, now looked like a pile of bones, with my white skin sticking snuggly to them and my once bright green eyes were dull, and had dark purple bags under them.

I should have never let him take me away from the Sins. When I had looked into Zel's eyes after getting my memories back, I had thought that I loved him, but nowI just want to go home, and be the person who truly held the other half of my heart. To be home with Ban.

When those lost memories had forced themselves back into my brain I was so confused and overwhelmed with multiple mixtures of emotions, but the moment Estarossa returned and gleefully announced he had killed Melio, I was quickly brought crashing back down into this reality. My rage had turned back into sorrow, and the lust I had felt for being back with Zel turned into shame.

A vicious guilt continues to consume me for letting Zel take me away from my friends and family, but I know that I can't leave him again. I know he promised me that he won't hurt my friends or try to find a way to kill Ban but I don't believe him. Ban may not be able to die but he still feels pain, and I know better than anyone that there are fates far worse than death.

A part of me also feels obligated to stay with him. He had spent 3000 years thinking I was dead, mourning me, when in reality I was alive, and had just forgotten all about him. If our love was so strong, why didn't I remember him? Sure my nightmares were my past, but I could never remember his face in them. My heart never ached for him the way it does now to be with Ban.

Part of me does still love Zel, and he will always have a place in my heart as my first love, but it's not the same, or should I say it's not as passionate as before. I don't feel fireworks when I kiss him, like I did every time I kissed Ban. The first few hours with Zel had been perfect. I had finally had my memories back, and it was like I was hit with one of Cupid's arrows as all my love for Zel took over my every thought. However, he wanted to pick up right where we left off 3000 years ago, though I was no longer that ruthless killer anymore. I didn't know how to pretend to be fine when I wasn't, and the more I thought about my feelings the more my heart kept aching for Ban, and my other friends.

I even miss Melio, and as hard as it is to admit, although I was still angry at what Melio, Merlin and Gowther had done to me, I also couldn't help but be grateful in a way. I was disgusted with the way my past self had acted, and I never wanted to have to turn into her again. I went from a short tempered woman who would kill anyone, who even slightly bothered me, to a woman who only fought when absolutely necessary.

It isn't all bad though, Gloxy comes and visits me once a day, just to chat and catch up. Zel tries to spend as much time with me as he can but he's busy leading the commandments, and trying to take over all of the races. I found some joy in small things in my memories like, laughing at a drunk Melio, and Ban with King, or just snuggling with Ban by a campfire. I hated to admit it, but the truth was, this wasn't my life anymore. Zel wasn't my life anymore. In my fit of rage, I had made a horrible mistake by turning my back on them all.

Yesterday when Gloxy was here, he told me about how he and Drole captured King and Diane to show them his past. I scolded him, and he assured me they weren't harmed, that he was just trying to make them understand not only his and Droles history, but also little of mine. Hearing their names broke my heart, I missed them so much, I hadn't seen them since I got my memories back terrified that they would hate me.

Gloxy told me that before he had left, King had asked about me, wishing me well. My heart ached, at the thought of my best friend not understanding why I was with the evil commandments. Him thinking that I chose to side with them, and give up on Ban.

Just thinking of Ban, I would feel my eyes start to tear up. I missed him more than words could describe. I felt trapped here, not because I was per say, but because I knew he would never forgive me for leaving with zeldris. Not only that but his best friend was dead and I did nothing to stop it. Ban is the man who I not only want to be with, but also need to be with. He made me so happy, and made me try harder to be a better person.

I sighed sliding down the wall, resting my head on my knees. I could feel my past self and my current self fighting for control over what I should be feeling, and it was very overwhelming. I still want what's best for Zel, he deserves happiness. This month has made me feel more like a prisoner, now I know a little bit of how Ban felt in Baste Prison.

I wanted to leave and go back to my home. to my family. but I knew I couldn't. Ban might be physically safe, but my other friends weren't. Zel was ruthless, and he would have the help of the commandments to hurt them. I knew he would never lay a hand on me, but Gloxy, The Sins, and Arthur weren't safe if I angered him. He would probably make me watch as he killed them, starting with ripping out King and Gloxy's wings.

My stomach turned at the thought of the horrible act. So I sucked up my misery and just continued to fondly think of my previous life in secret. I thought about my favourite scarlet eyes looking into mine, and about the first time he told me he loved me.

I was rudely interrupted from my happy thoughts, when I had heard a crash. Scared that Gloxy had gotten hurt I got up and went running towards the area I heard it came from. I rounded the corner to see Gloxy flying over a knocked out guard. "(Y/N) we have to go now" confused I tried to ask what happened, but he put his hand over my mouth to quiet me.

"You're not happy here, and as much as it pains me, I have to get you out of here. There are people outside, they are going to help me fix this for you" Before I could say anything he picked me up and flew me out of the palace, towards a huge golden army.

He put me down, only for me to be picked up again by someone else.