Fate Worse Than Death

Let Me

Bellamy POV:

This heavy bastard lol I carry Finn's weak body into medical as Arkadia watches in shock to see that Finn is still alive. Jackson helps me lay Finn onto a bed as Abby and him get to stabilizing Finn enough to where we can leave him unsupervised in case he were to die whiles we were gone. Jackson and Abby ask no questions till they have finished but the shock in their eyes is ever telling.

"Bellamy, Clarke, explain." Abby pulls Clarke and I to the side so we could talk privately. "This is not possible. We all saw Finn die. So how is he here and alive? " Clarke explains how we found out that Finn was alive and the deal we made with Lexa to keep Finn alive and keep the alliance. "I guess that explains all the cuts and bruises."

"I tried to clean him up as much before we got here but I didn't have much to work with" Clarke tells Abby as they cut off Finn's clothes to reveal the extent of Finn's wounds. "Mom how are we gonna keep him safe or even alive?"  I rush to Clarke's side when tears begin to trickle down her cheeks. Clarke leans onto my hand upon her shoulder, accepting my efforts comfort her.

"I don't know Clarke but we will keep him safe, no matter what it comes to." Abby continues to clean up the vomit and infected wounds as she speaks. Without another word Abby gets up and has Jackson follow her out of the room giving Clarke and I one last glance leaving Clarke and I alone with an unconscious Finn. As Clarke leaned into my embrace I felt like I was at home, for the first time since we got down to the ground.  I want nothing more than to have Clarke be mine and mine alone.

Finn's POV:

I open my eyes to the steel ceiling of med bay. I turn my head at the sound of Clarke's sniffles to see Bellamy embracing Clarke as she cries. I can't lie, it hurt to see her in pain but it hurt more to see someone else comforting her. I know she is not mine, but it still hurts. Let her be happy! She deserves so much more than you. Clarke turns and sees me staring.

"Hey you're up" Clarke chuckles as she wipes her tears.

"I'll give you two some privacy" I see pain in Bellamy's eyes as he leaves.

"Are you feeling better princess " I chuckle through the pain in my chest. Clarke can't help but laugh.

"You were just dying and your first question is 'Are you feeling better princess' " Clarke awfully mocks me through her laugh. "You're unbelievable." Clarke leans in to meet my lips but I turn away. Pain and confusion is in Clarke's face as she pulls away.

"I'm sorry Clarke, we can't. It's just-" Its hard saying it out loud, admitting that she's not mine.

"It's just what Finn?!?" tears again fell from Clarke's eyes that I knew was my fault. She was angry, annoyed and hurt but I knew she wouldn't let me go so I made the choice for her.

"You're not mine Clarke, you should be with Bellamy. He's great, I mean he can be a real ass sometimes but he loves you Clarke, and you care about him" I smile through the pain my words cause me but I need to know she'll be protected after I'm gone. I try and reach for a strand of Clarke's hair that was getting mixed with her tears and snot but Clarke got up and left. I'm sorry Clarke, but this is the only way. I lay my head back down and let my body rest for once since the day I thought I died.

Bellamy's POV:
Outside Kane, Abby, the head guards, and I discuss the new up on security around Arkadia with the threat of Lexa invading after her betrayal at Mount Weather and in response to us taking Finn from their village. Behind Kane I see a crying Clarke walk out of med bay.

"I'll be right back" I run to Clarke and asked, "what happened?" I search her face as she sobs when I notice nosy people gathering, so I pull Clarke into my tent away from prying eyes.  "Did Finn hurt you?" The very thought of Finn hurting Clarke makes my blood boil.

"No he didn't. It's just I guess Finn and I broke up, I mean we weren't ever officially together but you know" I can't help but feel happy at this news but I just take Clarke's hand as she picks her skin.

"Clarke it's okay. You're strong and he know you deserve the world." I gaze into Clarke's ocean blue eyes as I speak so she knows I mean it. A fierce tension between our lips that are only inches away, drives me blind with my love for Clarke being the only thing I can feel.  I close the distance between us and take her in. Desire and heat runs through us both as we intertwine our lips. Finally. She can finally let herself feel for me. In those moments I was the happiest man alive, until she pulled away.

"Bellamy we can't" Clarke explains.

"Why not? You're not with Finn anymore, I love you Clarke. I WANT you and I KNOW you want me too."  I plead with Clarke to accept it.

"That's the thing, I don't know what I feel" Clarke begins tear up as I continue.

"PLEASE Clarke, Let yourself feel what you feel for me. Let me give u the love you deserve. I'm not the type of guy to fight for any girl, but I don't know what it is about you that I can seem to get you out of my head. Clarke it's always been you and I, we can do this together. If only you don't shut yourself down. If you need forgiveness for what happened while Finn was gone or for Mount Weather, I'll give that to you." I take Clarke's hands and give her knuckles a gentle kiss, " you're forgiven, together we can make it through this" Being Vulnerable to anyone is so hard for me but with Clarke I feel whole, I'm supposed to be this tough leader but Clarke let's me be who I really am.

"I'll think about it, but that's all I can promise. I still have to figure things out, okay?" A little sadness from her not saying yes is completely outweighed by the joy I feel hearing her admit that she will consider it. A grin spreads across my face as Clarke heads out the tent. Oh ya! Who's the man? I'm the man! I must look like a dork dancing around my tent but luckily there was no one near.