Fate Worse Than Death

Awakening of the Soldier

Finn's POV:

Those words ring through as I remember every memory, every conversation, and her every laugh. All I could think of was her and now my nightmares have come true. I have killed Clarke, I was the cause of her death.

"Finn?" Raven's voice seemed like a mere echo within all the noise of my head. I couldn't reach Raven's call I could only sit and watch my memories of Clarke play on repeat. I am afraid of the darkness that consumes me, my demons, and the voices that ask "how much more sorrow can you take?"

Jaha's POV:

When Allie and I saw the boy sitting in his own grief  we knew our plan had worked. He was broken and perfect for us to mold. Finn sat there numb as tears fell continuously. When he finally noticed us he raised the gun at my chest protective of who he thought was all he had left.

"They're here to rescue you Finn." Raven brilliantly stuck to her role and prepared the perfect weapon for man kind. He questioned not why Clarke was dead because of him, instead he accepted it and believed anything Raven told him exactly how we imagined. He become nothing more than a robot. And every good robot follows orders. Slowly he lowered the gun and fell in line with Raven. Soon he will help us save humanity but first we need him to get rid of those who try and stop us. The soldiers I left in the village are acceptable losses and they understand they're job is greater than any being.

Finn's POV:

It can't be undone now. It feels like I'm sleep walking but I can't wake up. I'm tried of trying to be brave. I'm tired of trying to be a better man. I'm tired of fighting the voices. I'm done! The cold steel in my hands no longer feels like spiral of nightmares but a tool for the power to end all violence. Every atom in me told me believe Raven and do what must be done, but that small inkling remained nagging for the truth on how Clarke died.

"How?" I ask Raven and Jaha behind me to give me some clarity but all they did was stare at void spaces and I needed answers now. "How did she die?! What did I do to her?!"

"Soon after you left Polis, Skaikru went after the grounders. Clarke tried to follow you and she ran into them here. They wanted to punish you for warning the grounders. We found and buried her." Once again my heart was ripped apart after its fatal wound. The wound that will forever mark my soul. Jaha's words gave me clarity to know who was friend and who was foe. And I swear on Clarke's grave that I will end Skaikru's violent reign. For her. For the future. For peace.

"This world can't hurt you anymore princess." I speak to her in the clouds before letting the final blocks drop. No longer was I holding back my hate. Here I was again, in the same village I destroyed my life in and now it will be the place I destroy in order to save. Torches burnt out, Arcadian invaders sit drunk around the village. I feel the hot flame burn brighter as I watch the village set ablaze. No grounders were there but they weren't the targets. As the guards ran chaotically I met each and every one with a bullet in their skulls. I hear Clarke's voice in my head as one by one I watch them drop. Her kindness and her smile, those which I'd never see again. A virus Arcadians were and I followed all in the village until they lay cold by my hand. There's no going back now, this is now you.

Jaha's POV:

The boy held more anger than we hoped for but now we watch him slay Arcadian men without blinking. He chased after those who ran and came back covered in droplets of blood with no emotion, no care, with just a single tear. He was broken because of a lie but that makes him ours........