AS1: RISK [✔]

36

Chapter 36
Zari

I look at Gin. I'm crying because he told me about what happened before. He chuckled while cupping my face. Our foreheads and noses touch each other while our tears keep on falling.

He smiled. "Please...wait for a year." he caressed my face. "I'll be in Florida for a year with Syrine for our divorce."

I bit my lips. "Are your parents okay with that?"

"Don't worry about them," he kissed my forehead. "Kami na ni Syrine ang bahala sa lahat."

Natahimik ako sa sinabi nya. It's really happening. Gusto na talaga nila na mag-file ng divorce. It's good since they will be free already and Syrine will be able to be with the man she truly loves.

But...why do I feel so scared?

"Zari,"

Napalingon ako kay Gin nang tawagin nya ako. We were about to part ways so we could go home. I looked at him, hinihintay ang sasabihin nya sa akin.

"Will you..." he looks deeply into my eyes. "...take risks with me again?"

Natahimik ako sa sinabi nya. That was when I realized why was I so scared at the idea of him being free again. Palaging nasa isipan ko iyong araw kung kailan kailangan ko syang palayain.

The pain was still fresh in my mind. The wounds still linger in my heart. It feels like I was haunted by our past. Kaya natatakot ako. Natatakot ako na baka kapag sumugal ako ulit...pareho lang ang kalabasan.

I faked a smile. "Let's just talk about it when you're already divorced. I don't want to rush things."

Dumaan ang lungkot sa kanyang mga mata dahil sa sinabi ko pero kaagad din naman itong nawala. He smiled at me softly. "Can I have your number, then?"

Napataas ang kilay ko. "Why?"

Napatikhim sya dahil sa tanong ko. "So, I could text and call you while I'm at Florida."

"No," kaagad na sabi ko kaya natigilan sya.

Napaayos sya sa pag-tayo. "May I know why?"

"Just no," mariing pagkasabi ko.

He looked like he was about to ask me again for the reason but he stops himself. Nakahinga ako nang maluwag dahil doon. I thought he was about to enter his car but suddenly he walks toward me.

Hinawakan nya ang ilang hibla ng buhok ko. He kissed it while looking at me. "After my divorce..." he smiles softly. "...I won't let the stars disappear from my sight again."

Mahina akong natawa dahil sa sinabi nya. I smile at him which made him smile widely. "I hope that when that time comes, the fear is no longer in our hearts."

He reached my cheeks so he could caress them. "You're the only one who's afraid, Zari."

I fisted my knuckles because of what he said. I suddenly hate myself for being who I am before...for being afraid to take risks again. But how can I toughen myself up if I'm already too wounded because of what happened in the past?

Nakakatakot. Natatakot ako na baka kapag kumapit ako sa kanya ulit ay bibigyan ulit ako ng rason para bumitaw. Nakakatakot kapag masyado kang nagmahal kasi masyado ka ring masasaktan sa dulo.

"Hala! Anong nangyari?!"

Nagulat ako nang narinig ko ang boses na iyon. It was Reign's voice. She's with Suji and they're bringing some snacks. Umiiyak ako kanina habang wala sila kaya kaagad kong pinunasan ang mga luha ko nang mapansin sila.

"Anong problema? Bakit ka umiiyak?" kaagad na lumapit sa akin si Suji pagkatapos ilapag ang mga snacks sa lamesa. "May masakit ba sayo? May nanakit ba?"