Eliza
After "making up" with the group it was awkward to rejoin them. The first few days were awkward at first. But this last week had been fine. There was a game tonight, but we weren't going. I had been trying to not see Miles because I knew it would make James pissed. But I felt bad because he had been back for a week and half and all he has gotten was hate. I should've been kinder to him, I knew that, but risking this group for him could not work. I would get cut. Everything was so sensitive right now. I knew that I could beat Miles up in an alleyway and he would still be kind to me. We were headed to Tau's house right now to hang out tonight. I just wanted to go home and stare at the ceiling. I missed August. It had been 3 weeks and she had not contacted me once. I needed to accept it was over, but I couldn't. Her tour was starting in a few days which meant she was probably very active on social media right now. I couldn't bring myself to stalk her. I wanted to. I wanted to see her gorgeous face on the screen of my phone, but I knew that if I did this whole thing would seem so much worse. At Tau's house we just hung around and took turns playing shooting video games. Wren was also sulky like me. She missed Elijah. Which I didn't think was possible but apparently it was. Someone had to continue to comfort her. I wish I could've told them about August so I could have their comfort. But I figured now would be a bad time to tell them because I was already on thin ice and they could get mad that I had waited this long to tell them. It had to be at a different time, or never. By the time it would be OK to tell them there would be no reason to tell them anymore. I just sulked internally until I could get home.
When I got home my mom and Niall were sitting on the couch watching some cooking show. My mom's eyes lit up when she saw me.
"Eliza! Come sit with us." She called and motioned me to the couch. I groaned and kicked my shoes off. I walked over and sat on the chair beside the couch. My mom rolled her eyes and then paused the tv.
"Okay, so I talked to your dad and he said that he would come visit here rather than you go to Japan. A nice compromise." A huge smile covered her face. She was way too excited about that awful news. I didn't want to see him entirely. And I was still not over what my mom had said about me leaving, purely out of self-interest and manipulation. I processed him coming and it was bad. But it was better him being here than me being there.
"Okay. Yeah, that is better than going to see him. I mean I fucking hate him and don't want to see him at all. But." I went on and kicked me feet up onto the coffee table.
"Eliza! Don't say that about your father." Niall looked at me and had a little bit of a glare. What was it to him?
"Also, Parker said that August had left a drawstring bag at the door the other day and he had thrown it in the garage, so I went to get it and it seems like some of your clothes were in there. I put it on the ground in your room." My mom went on. August had been here. August had been here the day we broke up and she left, and I hadn't known. I shouldn't have gone to see Miles. Fuck Miles at this point. I should've just stayed with her on the beach. I wished August was here now, in my room. I quickly left the living room to see the bag. Maybe she had left me a note or something. When I ran up to my room and saw the bag sitting on my bed I abruptly stopped. There was probably not anything in it. I opened it and dumped everything out onto my bed, which was a mistake as the clothes had dirt on them. I ruffled through the items: my sweater; a half drank bottle of vodka; August's lipstick; August's deodorant; and my socks. Why had August felt the need to return this? Half the stuff was hers. There had to be some sort of note or message. There was no other reason to have given this to me. The stuff in here was as much hers as mine. I looked into the bag again and there was nothing. I looked into the pockets of the sweater and nothing. I rummaged through the pile but there was nothing. I threw everything on the floor. I could feel the stream of hot tears falling down my cheeks. I fell onto the floor and leaned against my bed. I put my cheeks into my hands and just sat there crying.
