better off without you

43

june first.
may flew by really quick most of it was spent with owen but as of right now we were in a small fight, he had stopped doing his school work and i yelled at him for it which he didn't take lightly. he hates being told what to do which i don't blame him but this was necessary. this happened a few days ago and we still haven't talked since, i felt like it was more than that, it was built up anger from the two of us but i wasn't worried about it, i don't think either of us were really in the mood to talk anyways.

we had a long weekend, teachers workshop was monday and it was currently friday night. my only plans were to go to shane's, i knew i'd see owen but we probably wouldn't talk much anyways.

i just wore leggings and sweatshirt and threw my hair up in a bun, i told mads i'd meet her there so i had to get going now.

"i'm going out" i yell as i walk down the stairs putting on ugg slippers
"be safe, text me when you're there please i love you"
"yup, love you too"

the usual group was there along with other kids from school who are typically there.
"hey" madi wraps her arms around me
"hi!"
"i need to get drunk" she claps her hands and walks into the house before me, owen was sitting with cole and another girl who was a little too close for comfort. we had only been dating about two weeks but feelings were there long before, i was never the jealous type when i came to relationships mostly because the guys i have been with before were not as much of a flirt as owen is which is why i worry when he's with girls.
we make eye contact for a second before he looks away, he was way more mad then he needed to be. i guess now that we're together things we say come more harshly like me telling him to get his grades up.
i fill a cup with watermelon juice and watermelon vodka, this was one of the drinks that could make me tipsy rather quickly which was what i wanted at the moment.

"you came!" shane says opening his arms for me to hug which i do
"you think i would miss one of your party's?"
"well i just didn't know with whatever is going on with you and owen"
"yeah.. uh who's the girl that's all over him"
"oh that's sam, his ex. shit i didn't mean for it to come out like that"
"oh awesome" i pull my lips tightly together and nod, what the fuck.
"no, don't worry about her they only dated a few months and besides he's with you"
"i don't know what we are right now"
"you guys will be fine, get drunk, sleep together then wake up and make up"
"that's not exactly how it works but thanks"
"just enjoy yourself alright"
"i will"
he nods and walks off probably to go find emma or something, i make my way around the house saying hi to some people mostly trying to avoid owen.

hours had passed and some how i ended up talking to mark and a few other people, it wasn't smart but here i was. we were playing truth or dare, i was more observing than actually playing.

"what are you doing" owen asks pushing through the group of people
"oh now you wanna talk?"
"alana lets go" he pulls me up from the couch and starts pulling me towards the door before i loosen my arm from his grip.
"owen stop" he turns to face me as i cross my arms over my chest
"what are you doing" he asks again
a circle had formed around us making everything so much more awkward than it needed to be.

"you ignore me all night to hang out with your ex then when i sit with a few other people you get pissed?" i snap
"god alana lets just go home"
"and avoid all this? yeah right" i add a small laugh at the end
"what were you doing with him" his gaze goes from me to mark
"we were playing a game"
"a game?" he questions
"a game."

"we need to go" he says
"why"
"i don't want you with him"
"god, it's fine"
"alana he fucking raped you"
his voice was loud enough for everyone around us to hear, i felt all color drain from my face. how could he just announce that to everyone.
"fuck you asshole, we're done" i push him out of my way and straight out to my car.

by the time i was home my heart was completely broken. it was supposed to be something that stayed between our group and now half of my grade knows what had happened and it was all because of him. the guy i had fallen in love with the past several months.

time skip -graduation-

don't fall don't fall don't fall don't fall. those words were repeated over and over as i walked across the stage and took my diploma from principal cadwells hand.
"thank you" i whisper and walk further down the stage until reaching the end and walking off.

owen and i were officially broken up, shane and cole made an effort to talk to me but i knew they were just trying to get owen and i back together. there was no use as he would probably end up in italy and i would be in college. at this point i didn't care how much distance was between us, i couldn't wait for him to leave.