Semishira- texting story

Mistake

Shirabu stared at Semi, his concern for him grew every few seconds. Semi couldn't even seem to form proper sentences without overthinking, and stopping himself from talking. Semi was acting strange and Shirabu wasn't okay with it. 

"Eita, you know that if you have something to say, you can say it. I won't judge you or get upset or anything like that so just... just say what's on your mind." Shirabu attempted to explain.

Semi looked at Shirabu for a second and then looked away sighing. "I think that... if I say what I'm thinking you will definitely get upset... and  just... I don't want to hurt you."

Shirabu furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, "Eita, I don't know what you're talking about... if you have something to say then you need to just say it."

Semi frowned, "You don't... it's just... we aren't..." he couldn't figure out exactly how to say his thoughts, "Shirabu, I'm graduating soon and I'm just... we will be separated and I just don't think that..." 

Shirabu felt himself start to get frustrated, Semi wasn't finishing his sentences, and Shirabu had a good clue on where this conversation was leading, he was just hoping that it wouldn't happen. "Eita please finish your damn sentences."

Semi's eyes widened, Shirabu hadn't snapped at him at all in the past few days. He was expecting Shirabu to get very frustrated during this conversation, but he just wasn't ready for it. "Right sorry, I just think that we aren't... I mean like I said, I'm graduating shortly and you're still gonna be here and I just don't know how that will affect our relationship," Semi avoided eye contact with Shirabu as he continued, "then there is also both of our mental health struggles... it just..."

Shirabu's eyes widened, he knew exactly where this was leading to and he didn't know if he could handle it, "What are you... Eita are you saying that we should..." Shirabu was afraid to finish his sentence, he didn't want to think about it, let alone say it. 

Semi closed his eyes and nodded his head, he didn't even want to look at Shirabu. He really doesn't want to see Shirabu in pain, but he doesn't think that staying in a relationship will work for them anymore. "Kenjirou... I love you it's just that I really don't think-"

Shirabu interrupted him immediately, "You're joking, right? Please tell me this is a fucking joke."

Semi remained quiet, not knowing what to even say right now. He hated this, he really didn't want to do this, but he knew it was for the best. Neither of them would be able to handle it when Semi graduates, it's just not worth it in the end. 

"Eita please respond, please just tell me this is a joke and that everything is okay," Shirabu felt himself tear up slightly as Semi kept his eyes closed, not responding, "Eita just say it's a goddamn joke!" Shirabu yelled this time, standing up.

Semi flinched at Shirabu's yelling, "I'm... Kenjirou I just don't-"

Shirabu interrupted Semi once more, clearly he was holding back tears, "If you're really going to do this then you have no right to call me by my first name anymore."

Semi nodded, "Alright... Shirabu, I'm really sorry but... I don't think that either of us will be able to handle long distance or... I don't know I just don't think this is a good idea anymore. We weren't even a good match in the first place." He didn't like what he was saying, he hated it. At this point he regretted mentioning breaking up, but he can't turn back now.

Shirabu couldn't believe what he was hearing, for the most part their relationship was amazing, they barely had any serious fights once they got together. He thought their relationship was practically perfect so he couldn't figure out what is driving Semi to end it now of all times. "So you're really not joking around..." Shirabu finally let his tears fall, "That's fine. If you want to be a complete asshole and dumbass I can't stop you. I'm not gonna beg you to stay with me... I just wish you had a better reason for all of this."