What if I ain't no violinist?

75. Twoset Zookeeper II

A/N: This is a prequel to Twoset Zookeeper, Chapter 58 of this book. Either episode could be read first. I hope you enjoy it..!!

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Eddy's boyfriend Brett was a zookeeper. His friends often asked how they met. His friends also asked whether it was easy to fall in love with him.

Eddy would smile and say;

"You be the judge."

This is how they met.

Eddy had been pretty annoyed with the fact that he has had no prospects in a while. 

He's been lonely and unhappy about it for quite some time.

His well-meaning friends at work would say to him;

"You're a nice guy Eddy, you just gotta get yourself out there."

Eddy sighed and decided to try something different.

Eddy attended a speed-dating party.

He had 2 minutes to chat with someone in front of him before they moved away in rotation.

He immediately became bored and regretted coming.

He understood the people who came to these things were nervous. He was too. But he disliked "small-talk" and was bored after the third person opened with "Hi, how are you?". He came to the realisation that most people would open a conversation like that, wasting 20 precious seconds out of 120.

Eddy decided to fast track his questions as much as possible. So to his next candidate, he responded with;

"Good, thanks for asking. Do you play a musical instrument?"

He got a response "No" and the conversation just totally died on the spot.

To his next candidate, he responded with;

"Good, thanks for asking. Do you play a string instrument?"

He got a response "What do you mean by a string instrument?" and when Eddy rephrased his question "As in, like a violin or a guitar?" his candidate replied;

"Oh, no, I don't. Though I wouldn't mind learning guitar. ...Who plays violin these days!?" and that was the end of that lead.

When Eddy got his next "Hi how are you?" by his next candidate, his eyes glazed over and he responded with an unintentional slurry monotone;

"Good, thanks for asking. Don't you just hate the viola?"

Without missing a beat, he got a response;

"Hell yeah, can't stand the bloody things."

Eddy immediately snapped out of his trance and refocused his vision on the young man in front of him.

Pitch-black hair, strong eyes and a cheeky grin.

"...You play violin?"

"Used to. I take it you do, too."

Eddy decided to try another question.

"...when was the last time you touched a llama?"

"Oh sh*t, can you smell it on me? I'm sorry. But it's actually an alpaca."

"What the f*ck?"

Well after that, there was no way Eddy could focus on any of the remaining 24 candidates he was to meet. All he wanted to do was find out more about the guy that allegedly smelt like an alpaca who used to play the violin.

About an hour later, when everybody had thier 2 minutes with everybody, each participant had their multiple choice answer sheet collected. These were tallied by the organisers and a timetable was given to each person which showed when they could meet with their mutually interested partners and have some extra 1 on 1 time with them. Eddy only put one guy on his choice list. He smiled when his timetable said he could meet him straight away.

"Brett.. Yang?"

"Yeah."

"No wonder you smell grassy."

Brett laughed.

"So you smell like oranges then, Eddy Chen?"

Eddy shrugged. It was an old joke in reference to the pronunciations of their Chinese surnames.

"So, Brett, you and the llama?"

"It's an alpaca. Don't get jealous though, I can assure you we didn't get along."

"I was just trying to make the conversation iNtErEsTiNg. You floored me with your answer."

"You floored me too. My initial thoughts were man, this guy's got such a heightened sense of smell, he could work as a police dog. I must say, you did ask the most iNtErEsTiNg questions out of all the candidates I met tonight."

"Oh my god... So, you and the... alpaca?"

"You make it sound so scandalous, Eddy."

"It's not every day you meet someone who's paranoid of smelling like an alpaca."

"I'm a zookeeper."

"Ooooh. And you take care of alpacas?"

"Well, I don't normally but I had to attend their enclosure today cos I was called in to smooth things over with a visitor who got spat at."

"OMFG. Are you always this funny?"

"I don't think I'm funny. No one's ever told me that I am. So, what do you do in your time while I end up smelling like an alpaca?"

"...I play the violin in an orchestra."

"Oh my god how cool is that. Where at?"

"The Sydney Symphony Orchestra. Concertmaster."

"Holy sh*t, you're like my superhero."

Eddy blushed and felt so giddy inside he thought he was going to squeal like a 14-year-old girl.

"Brett, do you have other candidates you wanna meet and greet tonight?"

"What? When I have you in front of me? Heck no."

"Neither do I. Do you want to leave this place and go grab a bubble tea?"

"Oh my god I thought you'd never ask. Next thing you're gonna tell me you have perfect pitch and my knees are gonna buckle."