What if I ain't no violinist?

112. The Haircuts by Butcher

Whenever Brett or Eddy got their hair cut a tad too short, particularly with the hair clippers on the sides or at the back, one would tease the other by calling them "Shaun". As in a sheep that got "shorn" (which sounded a bit like "Shaun") or sheared too much. Just a little classic Aussie sheep joke that people would say to each other. Jokes aside, there was a barbershop near where they lived that they've been going to since they moved in together, unfortunately, their favourite barber retired a few months ago and the new guy wasn't very good at cutting Asian hair. The boys started getting bad haircuts.

Eddy returned home after getting a haircut and Brett recoiled in horror at first glance.

"OMG Eddy, I'm sorry but honestly, they're getting bloody worse."

Eddy grabbed his hair with both fists as he screeched.

"Oh no!!"

"I'm due for a cut too. I'm gonna try to avoid the butcher and ask for the other guy."

They've actually nicknamed the guy "Butcher" as he's been ruining every single haircut they've had to date.

"But Brett, can you seriously avoid the butcher and ask for the other guy when he's standing right in front of you asking how you are and being all nice?"

Brett exclaimed.

"I know, he's such a friendly and nice guy... and so I feel so bad dumping him as my barber.. But he gives really bad haircuts!! I've come to a point where I realise being nice just doesn't cut it anymore...!!"

"I know. I know. Well, good luck going to the barber tomorrow then. I hope your hair will end up looking better than mine.. I mean, ANYTHING would look better than mine..."

Eddy heard the front door open and slam shut. There was an eerie silence.

Oh sh*t this doesn't sound good.

"Brett..?"

"Yeah, I'm home..."

Brett's voice was often hitched up to a tenor voice range whenever he was in a good mood. This time around, his voice had plummeted well past his natural baritone into the bass range. As sexy as his voice sounded, Eddy knew this was not a good sign at all.

Eddy heard Brett take off his shoes and kick them to the side. Eddy quietly counted in his head as he estimated when Brett would make an appearance into the living room where Eddy was. Eddy braced himself and looked up from his computer screen.

What he saw, he realised was something he was no way near prepared to see.

There stood Brett, in the worst ever haircut imaginable and beyond. Saying that it was hideous was being kind. Eddy realised all of a sudden his own horrific haircut he got yesterday would be an object of desire and envy from Brett's perspective. What Eddy saw on Brett was a haircut that would give you nightmares. In fact, Brett was probably feeling like he was in one right now. Perhaps an exorcist could eliminate the bad presence of whatever that was breathed into the haircut which appeared to have given it such a sacrilegious life of its own. It was truly an offensive haircut and it was worn by the person Eddy thought was the most adorable in the world...!! The contradiction and conflict caused made his head to throb and his stomach churn.

Eddy involuntarily gave out a choking sound from the back of his throat.

"Geez, thanks, Eddy."

"OMG... the butcher... he ... he got to you...!! I'm so sorry Brett."

Shaking his head, Brett started to pace around the living room;

"F*ck, I had no chance in hell. He was outside sweeping. Who f*cking sweeps their shopfront these days !? I just couldn't avoid him...!! OMG Eddy, I don't think I could live like this for 4 weeks...!!!"

"Just give it 2. It will grow out a bit in 2, I promise. And then we'll go to that really fancy Korean hairdresser that cuts hair like Kpop stars, they should be able to fix us up"

Brett turned around sharply towards Eddy.

"You recogn !?!? You'd need a whole engineering team to fix this monstrosity !!!"

"I... I've seen worse Brett...."

This may have been the biggest lie Eddy had ever told.

Brett groaned.