The Moon Hiding at Dawn

Chapter 21: Chasing Sunsets

I'm going to chase sunsets.

I ran as fast as I could, flying down the flight of stairs like I'm merely sliding in the air without much of an impact on the solid steps. I zoomed rapidly until the adrenaline immediately dissipated in the same pace of my movement. I slowed down and sat on the last step of the second-floor stairs, thinking that I'm starting to impulsively decide on things without any logic in doing so.

My renewed vigor plummeted downhill as the weight and lack of plan skewered my guts. I'm definitely acting out of character even though I fully know that that's been happening since day one. Sure, I'll be chasing her for answers but how exactly would I do that? What if another idiot so proud of his convictions would butt in? In the best case that answers were given, would I be ready to receive those? Or will I just run away? Can I even get near her and ask her for clarifications like it was nothing? If so, would she even dare to answer any of it?

I slapped myself. The hardest one I could possibly pull. I've been rising and climbing too close to the sun. I need to get myself down and grounded back to the earth.

My vision is tunneled to getting what I want as fast as I could and ending my uncertainties as soon as possible. Yet, taking a good luck around, everything is just normally progressing. People are just walking by, some rushing with papers at hand, some just loitering around. It's normal, maybe even slow... I'm the only one getting unreasonably fast.

I'm rushing things yet again though considering the circumstances, I really have not much of a choice. After all, I still have no clue on how long have they been together. As to how far intimate they have been. Millions of other reasons to keep going even though I'm trying to think of one to stop myself from going fast flowed in my head... which is probably proof that my brain doesn't want to know at all but just wants everything to end. All these reasons are just echoes of what I feel... that my heart won't be silenced at all until it's struck down.

Nevertheless, I should take it with most caution. I can't possibly attract unwanted and unfamiliar eyes towards me. Nor should I look like a desperate fool in front of those who know me.

I stood up and walked towards the gate and waited somewhere I can stand undetected and unsuspicious as well, which is to say blending in near a group of what I would assume to be friends and acting like the outcasted one. Not difficult when it has been a reality for me for quite a time. I didn't even need to say or do anything. The place is always crowded with people waiting for others to go out or waiting for a vehicle to ride. No one would notice me in the crowd unless they are specifically and deliberately searching for me.

Blending in, I stood in anticipation, ready to take my time but it turns out that I didn't even need to wait for that long as just a few moments later, Clyde passes by the gate with Kallen clinging into his arms. I tailed them as they walked to the left side instead of waiting to get a ride. From the school gate, one can only go left or right. Houses and dorms plus some stores in town are located at the right of the school while the left is sprouted with many commercial and public building so their direction could only mean one thing. A date.

There are a lot of people walking which makes it easier to follow them without any problem but my walk was coupled with a lot of side trips just to cautiously hide myself. Half an hour or so later, we arrived at the mall. And by 'we' I meant the two of them entering first and me after a few groups and persons later.

It's quite awkward to be stalking them at this point as they go window shopping all around the place, taking note of the fact that I was asked by staff of different stores and sections multiple times of what product am I searching for and offering their assistance in my "shopping". I brushed them off with a cold look and a flat "No thanks, I'm fine by myself" just so they remember not to bother me and suddenly blow my cover away. It's not really much of a cover though since I'm still in uniform and it's easy to spot students because of it. Staying at their blind spots will do the trick so long as I don't do anything to get anyone's attention.